About the missing girl in Portugal?

Question

I know the parents will have to live with the decision to leave their kids alone like they did for the rest of their lives but I am proper shocked at the way the media and news are skimming over the fact a couple left 3 children under in a hotel room alone.

Is this becuase they are a respectable older couple, both working as doctors?

If an un-married couple in their late teens found themselves in the same situation would the papers not be accusing them of neglect?

As a mum, it is something I would never have done.

The hotel offered a babysitting, room checking and a creche but they never took any of them. Maybe check your facts.

Bumble - I don't know what news service you are relying on but no one else seems to be of that opinion. I have watched it on BBC24, read it in The Express, The Scotsman, The Times and heard many discussions on Sunday AM on the BBC yesterday. All of which are unanimously reporting that they failed to employ ANY of the child minding services available.

Bumble - you have gone way of track here. I never made any criticism of you. Indeed you were the one acussing me of using the Sun as my main source of information. You don't seem to be understanding my question. It is about the media potrayl, not the situation itself. Get of your soapbox and answer questions you actually understand.

Answer 1

i know what u mean. i'm a mother too - my son is 4 years old, and i would never leave him alone like that.... no matter how close the restaurant was to the hotel !!!

i too have noticed that the press seem to be saying very little about the children being left on their own. and sadly i think u are right... if it had been a single mother, or a couple from a less respectable background, there would have been a lot more fingers pointing at them, and questions asked about their parenting abilities...

i suspect that if they find the body of the little girl, the press will then turn their attention to the parents, and why they thought it was a good idea to leave three very young children unattended in a hotel room, when the hotel actually had a babysitting service...

i hope they do find the little girl alive and well, but i have to be honest and say that i don't think that they'll find her alive.

i hope i'm proved wrong.....

Answer 2

I agree something more should be said on the news about how they neglected their children to go out and enjoy themselves with friends. They're acting as though it is a normal thing to do. All they keep repeating is the fact that they were eating in a nearby restaurant. I agree that if this were a teenage couple it would be all over the newspapers about how they left their kids at home alone to go out drinking etc.
Also, the parents claim they checked on their kids every half an hour over a period of 2 or 3 hours. Even though to me, checking on them is not acceptable regardless of how often you do it, since when did it take 2 or 3 hours to eat a meal? Its quite clear they were doing a little more than just eating.

Answer 3

I agree about the age issue and being unmarried etc.. I do feel genuine human empathy for the couple whose minds must be a living hell at the moment. Never underestimate an outward appearance - those people could be putting on a brave face (for various reasons, which when you think about it should become obvious without publicly saying so here). Don't you think these people will be getting advised from the police on what to say/what not to say right now??

Noone knows how they would react in a given situation as serious as this until they are in it. That is why I am reluctant to judge these people also.

However - in this day and age I would never leave children on their own in a hotel room ever, under any circumstances. The children could be away in seconds - is it really worth taking the chance? The answer is always no.

God Bless Maddy and I pray you are safe and well. Nothing else matters. I hope that the individuals behind this find it in their hearts to do the right thing and give the child back to her parents and hand themselves in to the police. That way the whole situation can finally start to achieve some closure. I pray that the person who has done this can find some remorse and overcome their sick mind by doing this, only then can they get the professional help and judgement they so clearly need to stop them from doing this ever again.

Answer 4

Although there is no law against it in the UK, small children should not be left alone anywhere at anytime!!! As parents we have duty to protect our children, not only from child abduction which is extremely rare, but also from all harm. Leaving 3 small children alone in the house is irresponsible altogether. What if one woke up and woke the others? What if one started choking? What if there was a fire? The consequences are many and unfortunately in this case an abuction took place which is probably the least likely thing to happen.

My question is why did they leave 3 small children alone especially when there was a babysitting service available? Checking on them every 30mns is not reasonable and the restaurant was not exactly next door!

Someone said that we should be asking about the crime of child abduction. Yes, it is horrible and it is wrong but it is not likely to go away and neither are paedophiles or child traficking rings although I hope they do one day! Our duty as parents is to be aware of these dangers and to protect our children. These parents are doctors, aware of child protection procedures. In the UK, a parent who goes out and leaves a young child alone at home would be referred to social services and they as professionals know this.

What on earth were they doing?! I feel for the little girl as she is the innocent party and has has no choice or control in her fate. As for the parents, they will never forget their actions but frankly my sympathy for them is rather limited right now!

I do hope she is safe!

Arch nobody is implying they deserved this!!! All we are saying is that leaving small children alone is not really a good thing to do!

Answer 5

i know, i was shocked that they had left two 2 year olds and a 3 year old! i wouldnd even leave an 8 year old alone...
the hotel did offer a babysitting service, and it makes it even worse that they were doctors...didnt they know better?
obviously they didnt deserve to have their children taken away, no one deserves that, but they should have been more careful.
my thoughts go to them though-they have elarnt a lesson and they must be kicking themselves right now...its so sad, but would many people leave children alone like that?
your right that if they were teens, etc...but the news HAS covered this issue, i was watching a programme and the parents lawyer was defending them, saying they went back to check every half hour (so they handt just done it once! ) and that everyone does it...(?)

Answer 6

Who says this is a bloke? It could actually be anyone, a couple wanting a child or a woman having lost a child. By assuming this is the work of a paedophile maybe they are missing other vital clues. Don't forget some people will pay good money for a child if they are desperate.

Answer 7

Hi, My sentiments exactly, why on earth did they leave them, and why hasn't the media picked up on it, yes if a couple who were on the dole had done this could you imagine the hoohaa about it but because they are a professional couple nothing has been said, it seems that the press are making excuses on why they left them, its ok saying the apartment was in sight but the back of the apartment where the perpetrator got in couldn't be seen. I would never have left my children apart from abduction what about fire, and the prospect of children wondering off. Lets hope Madeline is safe and she will be returned to her parents and the rest of her family God Bless Her.

Answer 8

As a mum I have to say that I would never have left my kids in the room on their own at all for any length of time at all.it only takes a few moments for a toddler to wake up and wonder where mummy and daddy are and go looking for them.

I feel so sorry for these parents though and would never ever want to be in the position they are today.

I really hope this has a happy ending for this wee girl and her parents, what she must wondering is terrifying for any parent to think about.

Bumbleboi.
The parents chose not to use the babysitting service.

EDIT; Bumbleboi. I heard it on the BBC news which stated that they did NOT use the service as the restaurant they were eating at was less than 50 yards away from their room.

I AM NOT JUDGING THEM. JUST SAYING I WOULD NOT DO WHAT THEY DID.

Answer 9

Agree with you.

If they were a young couple, or working class, or poor, or if it was a single mum, they would definately come under greater attack for leaving essentially, 3 babies in a hotel room alone. I was surprised when I learnt it was two highly intelligent people who had left their kids.

Age 2 and 3 is perhaps the worst age to leave a child because they can walk around, and tend to move around a lot (ie. they could have just as easily banged their heads, fallen over, smothered themselves etc.)

I agree that there isn't anything like a perfect parent who does everything right, but I disagree that all parents at some point neglect their children; I certainly wouldn't be pissed around my children, or leave them at home alone, or leave them in the bath etc. etc. Speak for yourself if you are willing to put your kids under ANY risk.

Answer 10

bumbledoi, people are not judging anyone the facts state that the parents left their children alone in a room asleep and went off to have a meal ,how could any reasonable person think that is ok .If they had left someone in charge why were they checking every half hour ,that was some meal to have your little girl taken away for. I sympathise with the parents but they have made the biggest mistake of their lives .we all hope it will have a happy ending for little Madeline and that those parent's and all other parents learn from this sad story.