Society is dull, isn't it? Do others feel like me?

Question

Society is all based on peer pressure. We have do certain things, inorder to belong. The majority of it is based on looks. I hate it here. People bore me. Other people cause the depression inside me. I'd like to move far away, somewhere where I'm some us a face in the crowd. I have so much in me. The energetic, vibrant personality I have is cover up by societys "shoulds." What's so great about life? Not depressed or anything, but have been bored for a year or so. Happiness is fleeting. Tell me something interesting.

I wish we didn't have faces. People are so superficial. I'm not attractive so I am left out most of the time.

Answer 1

As far as the genuine individual is concerned, society has a vested interest in keeping things dull. Dull is the "logica equina" and the "status quo". In primal psychology we can find a ratio behind this constant.

Attraction: Repulsion

This will be less of a burden to you if an effort is made to acheive a perspective from a higher vantage point. That's why a broad liberal arts education is of such great value.

You have correctly identified a very real phenomenon in the sphere of human habitation. Let us consider the historical example of Alcibiades and the Athenians. Between his radical individualism and the demos' demand for conformity we can see an exaggerated dialectic. This dialectic sheds much light, if we study it, on the shadowy features of human nature.

Society (psychological component - Freud's Superego, if you choose contemporary constructs) applies pressure in direct and increasing proportion to a particular individual as that person becomes distinguishable from others. Supersession of anonymity is an ontological achievement: it marks the psychological growth of the individual and opens up space for that individual to acheive more in a chosen realm. As that individual self-asserts through speech (logos) and action (ergon), he or she becomes more personified and concomitantly visible to other persons.

Now this is where the uncanny aspect begins to show itself, because the self-asserting attracts an equally spirited corrective in the form of the other(s) attempting to humble, or cut down *, the individual. In contrast, anonymity-invisibility most certainly secures one a safe place on the margins.

* Apropos of conceiving life to be a game-sport-contest, the spirited conception celebrated by ancient virtue, exposited only in modern times with force by Nietzsche. But [gasp!] we have Aristotle on record as asserting the life of the philosopher over that of the spirited individual!

Answer 2

Tell me if I'm wrong, but I'm guessing you're under 30. For those who are still young or in school (elementary thru college), there is indeed a lot of superficiality and peer pressure to belong.

Ignore it and just be yourself. Once you get out into the real world, you'll see that people tend to leave that kind of stuff behind. It's ironic that teen culture views itself as rebellious and views corporate culture as stifling and conformist, when in fact pretty much just the opposite is true. Once you get to a certain stage in your life though (I'm 36 if it matters), the peer pressure and looks-based conformity just stop being all that important. It's quite liberating actually; when you surround yourself with a more mature crowd, they are more willing to accept you for who you are.

I've heard from a few non- and ex-Californians that that state is somewhat the exception though, that a lot of CA west-coasters continue to be superficial people throughout much of their lives. I don't have any first-hand experience to know if it's true but it seems to be a pretty common perception so if you're in CA, consider moving. :)

Lastly, if you find that you're just bored with your life, then DO something about it. Seriously, there is no excuse for boredom. Read a good book (there are tons of them out there.) Take up a sport, or hiking, or mountain climbing. Volunteer your time with a charity. Or put your pent-up creativity to use on some project like a blog site, or writing songs, poems or stories.

Both happiness and boredom are just states of mind, and your state of mind is within your power to control and change. Don't be afraid to make a change in your life. If you don't, then nothing will change and you'll keep on feeling like you do now. You have the power to make your life better, you just need to think of how you want to do it, and then do it!

Answer 3

Why do you subscribe to society's ideals. You are one of a kind. God only made one person exactly you. You are unique. Why ruin that in trying to be like others. My philosophy is that society must meet my standards, not the other way around. I look at each day as a new challenge to accomplish what so many others cannot.....enjoy life. I don't follow the yellow brick road. I venture into the unknown. And who said you aren't attractive? Society? Just look at them....what do they know? You are as attractive as you choose to be. If you tell yourself you're ugly, then you are. If you tell yourself you are beautiful then no one else can hold a candle to you. Chin up love. The world is there for your pleasure. Get your armor on, sharpen that sword and get ready to kick some butt.

Answer 4

Dear One, Donot despair. Donot hide your light under a bushel. Forgive those who may not understand your glorious energy field. Only love is real. May I suggest some wonderful reading for you? The Disappearance Of The Universe, by Gary R. Renard and Your Immortal Reality by the same author. Just read them all the way through with an open mind and see what you think. Also works by Eckart Tolle might be great. Go to the spiritual-metaphyscal section of your public library(hopefully you have a good one) and start reading with an open mind. There are many paths home and I think what you are feeling is that urge to "get on with it" and go back to reality which some call heaven or enlightenment. Just give it a try. I understand how you feel. All who seek truth will find it. Good luck to you on your path. Also try going to Hay House website online. Just type it in to your search. Peace.

Answer 5

The answer lies in you. You need to soul search within yourself. We are amazing creatures (us humans). We have unlimited abilities. (We can travel into space, create computers, Internet, etc...). You can find the beauty in everything, or the horror. It's all in the way you look at it. Change the way you see life and life will change to the way you see it. Me, I am never bored. Simply entertained. Nature is a great way to find yourself. Try getting out to the woods and walk a bit. I know, you may say, that's boring. Don't go in with that attitude. Go in seeking to find yourself and you will. Do something about it! It's not good to go on feeling bored when there is so much to do in life and life is so very short. Don't waste it.

Peace!

PS: If you are unhappy with your looks, start telling yourself you are beautiful and believe it and you will be. It's all in your mind for the most part. Of course little cosmetic changes can make you feel better too, but all in all, we are all beautiful people, regardless of skin color, shape and size. You just have to believe you are and tell yourself that always.

I see beautiful people and I see plain people. To me, it's all just part of a big blend and they are all beautiful anyway. Diversity is part of who we are. Who really cares about the stranger who is so pretty or the one who is more plain. What's the difference when you are out on the streets? I talk to who ever talks to me, regardless of looks and many times find the most kindness in the most humble of people.

PSS: You say you are unattractive and because of it you are left out most of the time.... Again, stop telling yourself this. It makes the situation very real. Turn it around. Tell yourself that the ones who leave you out can't connect to the greatness of who you are. It has nothing to do with looks. Besides, anyone who didn't like me because I am not as pretty as I was 10 years ago is not my friend and never was. I seek to be with people who love me for who I am. We are all aging every day and cannot expect to look like a model all the way through life. Remember, all those pretty faces now will look pretty scary in 20 years! I can't even recognize some people I went to school with since they changed so much over the years and are no wheres near as pretty or good looking as they were. Yet, they are the same people!

Answer 6

This world can never satisfy a heart that demands more than this world could ever give, namely inner peace and understanding. In time we will all come to realize that this world is upside down, and so explains why things are superficial. A wealthy man could be the poorest man, and a super-model can be a very unattractive person. We all go through different phases in this life, but we must all learn the grand lessons, so don't let the lies of this seeming life get you down. Let yourself be you and never let fear haunt your steps. The good qualities you express are who you are and are eternal. The rest is nothing.

Answer 7

those times in life do come when u r negatively lookin on others under a loop & u c only their bad side... no u r not depressed but maybe u havent seen anythin new or excitin in ur life recently... take my advice... dont sit in 1 place n wait 4 smth 2 happen. seek 4 interestin stuff n find what u r good at... maybe u need 2 follow ur aspiration??? u know there s a part of society that consists of dumb ppl. but no1 can prove if some1 is dumb or not. 2 me most ppl seem like insensitive machines... but some of them have created a surface that they hide behind. cuz once some1 sees what u got in u, will it be power or wealth, envy comes along. ever noticed each 1 of us makes a defense when meetin society n we look completely diff once we get 2 know each other? maybe u want ur qualities 2 be appreciated? they will be, by the right ppl in the right time n u ll find the answer 2 ur ques...

Answer 8

Well, not every age is perfect. We just have to make the most of it. If you wish to find peace and quite, you need to move to some place remote, like the woods of Oregon or Alaska. Living there is rough, but there is the freedom from having to be around the dull crowd.

Answer 9

Your intuitions are correct, actually. Usually only sensitive and intelligent people look beyond the programming. A main agenda of society is to turn you into a compliant, easily controlled, robot. Few ever realize this, or even care once they, somehow, do. See http://www.montalk.net and Best of luck !!

Answer 10

change youself first