Husbands drinking is going on to much..?

Question

My husband drinking is out of control. I told him so many times how this is damaging our marriage and ask him to quit, seek help but he still contines to drink. He drinks on the weekends and three nights in the week. He buys a twelve pack and has to drink all in one night and on weekends even more. I am so unhappy and lonely since its all he wants to do and leave me with no attention. I am trying to find a better high paying job so I can support myself and going to leave if he does not stop. Any advice will be helpful.

Answer 1

I think you need to maybe have some other people talk to him. He sounds like an alcoholic and if you love him you really need to try to get him some help. If he has family that is close, maybe get them involved too. Have you told him you are going to leave if he doesn't stop drinking so much? If not, maybe that will wake him up a little bit. It won't get any better until he sees that he has a problem. Good luck

Answer 2

Try to think back to what attracted you to this man in the first place. Also try to track back to when he first started drinking heavily. Did something happen around the same time? Is he trying to numb the pain from some experience he had? Other than his drinking, how is your relationship? Does he know you love him and that you're there for him?

Often when we try to get someone to change their behavior, without meaning to we do it in a way that makes them feel bad about themselves. They feel there must be something wrong with them if they can't handle every day problems. So they act out even more. Is it possible this might be happening with how you express yourself?

You're feeling lonely and want more of his attention. Instead of focusing on what you're missing, try to turn that around to what he's missing. What does he need to feel better about himself so he won't need to drink so much? Try to help him find whatever he's missing. Try to remind him of his positive qualities. More than likely, he doesn't see that he has any positive qualities so he's numbing himself.

I know it's difficult to deal with this type of situation. In my own experience I found that when I shifted my focus away from my needs to the needs of the person I was dealing with, it became easier for me and more helpful to them. You also may want to call Al-Anon to see if they can offer any advice to you. All the best to you and your husband.

Answer 3

check out the local chapter of al anon. they are there for the families of alcoholics and are better educated in these matters.

Answer 4

start wearing stockings and suspenders, that'll get his attention