I am a professional and make a lot of money in my business. My wife is really lazy, leaving the housework and yardwork to me. I just can't keep up with all this anymore. When I come back from a road trip, all the cleaning and repairs are overwhelming. No matter how much money I make, it gets absorbed by paying for things damaged by trashy neglect. I believe in trying to make a marriage work. Marriage counciling doesn't seem to have an effect. At work, I'm internationally respected. I just can't sit and watch TV like she does.
2007-05-05 00:30:41 · 25 answers · asked by mojonah 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Threaten a divorce and if that doesn't work, follow through with your threat and get a divorce, Then you can have all the affairs you want, don't have them while you are still married. This only causes bigger problems! As hard as you try to make some marriages work, sometimes it's best to call it quits. If you believe in trying to make a marriege work, you don't think about having affairs!
2007-05-05 00:41:45 · answer #1 · answered by Gerry 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Having an affair is not the way to go as it is a cowardly act to satisfy your needs.
If your marriage is not working, then you need to sit down and discuss this with your wife. You know what is happening in the household and it will continue this way forever unless changes are made.
If trying marriage counseling didn't work, then find another counselor to help both of you as you can't fix it on your own.
I don't know if you have children, or if your wife works as well as care for children. You might consider having a cleaning person come in once a week to clean the house and when repairs are needed hire a handyman since you are financially sound.
If your wife is just sitting around all day, she may be depressed and may need to see her doctor. This is probably a good idea anyway. It is NOT easy being in a marriage and your husband is off on a road trip for a week and your left at home with everything.
Get help first and if all else fails then you just may need to get out of the marriage. Having an affair is not the way to go. Be a man and do the right thing.
2007-05-05 00:51:16 · answer #2 · answered by Patty G 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Explain the problem to her. Tell her she's lazy and your not going to keep giving her money if she's going to continue to be lazy. If you are the primary on ya'lls bank account, take her off of it so she can't use it. If you control her credit cards cut her off. Then maybe she will get the picture. If you can't do that then I suggest a divorce because affairs never work, ever. People always get caught and if they don't it takes up so much time and the girl or guy you plan on cheating with will eventually want more so just get a divorce and get it over with if your wife keeps things up. I know how affairs are, I've thought about it myself but honestly it's just never a good idea. It causes to much anxiety. So either cut her off and show her your serious or get a divorce.
2007-05-05 02:22:24 · answer #3 · answered by Amber W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As bad as she is an affair is not the answer, but if your miserable in this marriage, divorce is the answer. You cannot make a marriage work all alone, it takes two. If she refuses to work at it, are you willing to spend the rest of your life like this?
She doesn't sound very respectful of you, but cheating on her makes you just as bad...
It's nice you believe in making a marriage work, but how exactly is having an affair making your marriage work?
If your not happy, leave and end it, for everyone's sake...
Having an affair is opening a whole new can of problems, take care of this problem before you start something else...
2007-05-05 01:43:14 · answer #4 · answered by Innisfil g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you believe in trying to make a marriage work then why would you be planning on having an affair? Your statements are contradictory.
You say that "at work I am internationally respected"... so? What does this have to do with anything? And what does the amount of money you make have to do with cheating on your wife?
Why is it that you are afraid to end this relationship before you have another?
2007-05-05 00:44:59 · answer #5 · answered by mosaic 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Having an affair isn't going to do anything to fix your problem. As tempting as it must be, you're not going to feel any better.
And having an affair takes time and money that it sounds like you can't spare. It's time to make some changes at home. Either you have to accept your wife's laziness and move to a place that needs less maintenance, or you have to get her motivated to help. If counseling hasn't worked, it's doubtful she's going to be easy to motivate.
I don't know if you have a pre-nup, or if your wealth pre-dates the marriage but if she's that intolerable you may have to look into a divorce. That can get expensive, but maybe it's your only option.
But do NOT have an affair first. That would only be ammunition against you later.
2007-05-05 00:38:57 · answer #6 · answered by rohak1212 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Forget it. Affairs may be satisfying for the moment but does not resolve the problem and the hurt it causes others can never be repaired. If you make that much money, hire a housekeeper. Is this marriage worth saving at all or is having an affair a way out? Think long and hard before proceeding........Not been there. Never will.........
2007-05-05 00:39:09 · answer #7 · answered by adustygate 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm hoping you mean "how do I get started " as in "where do I start" and NOT how do I get started cheating...talk to your lazy wife and tell her to start contributing. Itseems you've allowed her to do this for quite some time. Help her through her lazy tendencies. Give her a project. There must be some other reason why you want to cheat. All that will do is give you guilt and hurt her. Try to reasolve your problems before you cheat. I think you're looking for an excuse to cheat big spender. Spend your time and money at counseling. Good luck.
2007-05-05 03:40:36 · answer #8 · answered by BB'sMom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you want someone who will worship you based on you telling us that at work you are "internationally respected."
While you're gone for months, you probably live out of hotels where they have things like room service and housekeeping. Welcome to the real world pal, you don't live in the hilton hotel and you're not a celebrity. Do yourself a favor and get over yourself, already.
Yardwork IS a man's job, hello! I'll be DAMNED if i'm going to be hauling around a weedeater just because you're too f*cking cheap to get a landscaper (ask your neighbors kids, they'll probably do it for ten bucks) or too f*cking lazy to do it yourself. If you make a lot of money, here's a concept: HIRE A HOUSEKEEPER TO COME ONCE A WEEK.
Have you even bothered to ask the poor woman what her problem is? Maybe she misses you and is depressed because you're gone so much? Ever think of that? No. you're too self centered to think about her.
Either way your statements are contradictory, and I don't believe you've convinced anybody, least of all myself, that you are committed to this marriage so you might as well divorce her because she sounds like she'd be better off without a pompous a$$hole such as yourself who thinks women were put on this earth to serve him.
Grow up.
2007-05-05 01:49:08 · answer #9 · answered by bostongirl_1981 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
How about starting by getting a divorce, because adultery is WRONG no matter what the problem is. Two wrongs do not make a right. Have you had a talk with your wife about the problem face to face? An affair is an awful idea dude, and it doesn't say much for your character. Good luck to you.
2007-05-05 01:20:55 · answer #10 · answered by iPokeBoyzWithStickz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋