NOBODY CARES! I Have Given Up. Hopefully You Care and Answer This Question....?

Question

Please take the time to read my long question and post an answer.

Me and my friend (I will call her Steph) ALWAYS ask whats wrong when my other friend (lets call her Hilary) is feeling bad.
She gets mad over EVERYTHING (no offence to Hilary). I am not exactly MAD at her, more annoyed and sad.
Well we always are concerned and stuff. We talk to her and treat Hilary like a queen. But she still is mad.

Well, I have been Sad/Mad/annoyed for the last THREE weeks, and no one is concerned. They dont treat me differently. They dont even care / notice I am sad.
Like what is wrong with this world. And if I am sad Hilary doesn't even care then acts all sad over nothing and Steph doesn't even care.
and when Hilary FINALLY ask me whats wrong, she talks about herself and her "problems" (problems? pfff)

Why are my friends being like this?
Please?
I still want to be their friends, but its seems like I can.
They are the best friends I ever had.
But they are not being nice friends.

WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Answer 1

Good question. This is not unlike what many people go through on a daily basis. We have our circle of friends and among the bunch you will have some strong, supportive, weak, needy, attention-getters, selfish, etc. It sounds as if you all have gifted all of your concerns and care toward one person and it seems this person has soaked up much of your spirit. When one friend is constantly in need of re-assurance and support, it can be draining to the rest of the group. Your focus now is you - because you realize that you have some issues which are causing your emotional and mental health to be in question. Don't play around - if these girls are your friends - just tell them. Say 'hey' look, I'm going through something here and I really need your support. If they love you and care about you and your concerns, they will focus on you for a change. Once you have been postively re-focused, believe me - somebody else will be in need. That's just the way it goes - but let me tell you this - don't "depend" upon your friends to "see" your issues. If you are really hurting - talk to an adult, or involve other friends who might be able to help steer you in the right direction. Sometimes, emotions that are heavy in negative issues such as anger, sadness, depression are not recognized. To me, your friend needs to talk to someone on a more professional level if she is always angry. There is something behind that and you girls are doing the best you can, but the weight of that anger is pushing you down. Get out and spend some time alone - get to know you and how you operate - good luck to you. I defintely understand.

Answer 2

You should concentrate on you a bit more. Some people are just self-centered and cannot see past whatever is bothering them. They are so selfish that they don't have a clue that something could possibly be bothering someone else because no one elses feelings count at all as far as they are concerned.
If they are the best friends you've had just wait until get the real thing.
Hopefully they will change and see that you have feelings too but right now they don't really seem to care.

God Bless

Answer 3

Ok well obviously Hilary is more of a prep then a friend by saying that she is only thinking of herself and don't care about no one else. you'll have friends like that, but its your disision to keep her as a friend, Steph I'm assuming is probably a quite person, so she might be afraid to ask you but she is noticing your problem, I think you might have to make another friend and see if they notice and if they don't well you do have one new friend that does care.

I went threw the same thing life is weird, you gain friends and you loose them and why they stop careing about you that means you are loosing them and either you do something to gain there attention back or there gone, when you loose them they hurt you really bad but then you will find someone you think is better and you move on. not saying to give up on your friends but maybe its time for you to find some backup friends sort of speak.

Answer 4

I'm not really sure who "he" is but i'm guessing it's her Daddy. If it is then i am sure he really cares for her and needs complete reassurance from you of how much you truly love and promise never to hurt his little girl. I think the texts were a good idea just in case he reads them...but try not to send too many because then it might get annoying and he might think you're obsessing and get the wrong idea. And if after her punishment is over she sees that you were there the whole time and are still there for her then she will know how much you care and then maybe she can convince her Dad to let y'all talk and get reunited.

Answer 5

Instead of holding things in you should CALMLY tell them that you have been very sad lately. If they don't ask why or show some concern then tell them exactly how you feel.
As far as them not noticing your feelings in the first place, it may be apparent to you but not obvious to others. Why not just start with a new rule: You will be open and honest about your feelings and explain nicely how you like to be treated. It's as simple as that.

Answer 6

So sorry to here.I went through this about a year ago. It is so much better to be friends with them and you see they are great people and you'll be like, "why did i hate them again?" but the only way to be happy again is to tell them how you feel. take out a minute or two of you and your friend's life to decuss eachother's opions and thoughts. If they still aren't being nice, and you can really see that they aren't, they aren't your friends. still be nice to them, but don't hang out with them as much until they know how annoyed they make you feel and what horrible friends they were. cheer up, everything will soon fall into place. Some people have warm kind and thoughtful heart, and some people have a cold evil and dark heart. I think you know who is who. :-P

Answer 7

Just be honest with your friends and tell them how you feel. You can not go through life getting mad because you feel they are getting attention over something you have not voiced your opinion over. If they do not know how you feel then you can not get angry over it.
You need to take control of the situation because no one is going to do anything for you but you. If they are your true friends they will understand and if not and they get angry for you being honest then they were not your friends to begin with. That will mean it is time to move on and find people who will want to be around you for who you really are. Sometimes the truth hurtsbut it weeds out the fakes.
Good luck.

Answer 8

Oh, sweetie! I am sorry! Friend problems are sooo hard!
I think honesty is the best policy. It sounds like you are a good and sensitive friend to notice when others seem "down". Not everyone is good at that. Maybe when you are feeling bad - you could ask your friends if you could share what's bothering you. Most likely, they will say yes, listen and try to help.

You sound like you have the gift of empathy - and not everyone does. But on the other hand, friendships should be two-way, and if you listen to their stuff - they should listen to yours. Maybe you need to share that you would like them to be sensititve as they can be to you. You have to ask for what you need, you know what I mean? Good luck

Answer 9

Well....I guess that these two girls really do care but in their own way. I think that you should tell them how you feel. It seems like they are tying to make you feel better by telling you how bad their lives are, even though that isnt a good idea. It seems like they love you and are trying to help. Maybe you should make yourself feel better instead of making yourself upset ALL the time!


EVERYTHING YOU PEOPLE SAID WAS WRONG! I AM STEPH APPARENTLY AND THIS ISNT HOW LIFE IS FOR US!

Answer 10

Talk to them about it. Tell them exactly what you just posted on here, let them know how you're feeling. Sometimes even when your friend does realize you're upset they may wait for you to bring up what's making you upset because they might think you don't want to talk about it. They may be thinking well I can see somethings wrong but I guess since she's not bringing it up she doesn't want to discuss it. They may try to instead talk about THEIR problems so that you can take your mind off of yours. Really my suggestion to you is to say to them "hey, why aren't we talking to each other about what's bothering us?" "why aren't we supporting each other like best friends are supposed to?" Talk to them, tell them how you feel, if they're your true friends, you'll be able to sit down and talk about it and figure things out.