Tips on how to get rid off Jehovah's witnesses????????????

Question

They won't bug ger off

Answer 1

- Put some red light bulbs into all lamps near the door.

- Befog your house a little, also inside.

- Arrange some bones in the front garden.

- Paint your face white. Dress up with a black cape.

- Install a microphone, connect it to your computer, install a voice changing software, set it to "satanic" and turn it loud.

When they ring open the door and say the words: "I WAITED FOR YOU!"

Answer 2

At times, a question such as this will elicit dozens and dozens of elaborate schemes to spare a householder an unwanted conversation with Jehovah's Witness door-to-door ministers.

All such schemes are a complete and utter waste of time!

Many of your neighbors have figured it out, and it's really quite simple:
1. Open the door
2. Smile (optional)
3. Ask "Jehovah's Witness?"
4. Receive affirmation
5. Say, "Thank you, but I'm not interested"
6. Gently close the door (slamming is rude, but your prerogative)

Please recognize that Jehovah's Witnesses are not primarily interested in converts, but in working to obey Jesus' command to preach (Matt 24:14; Matt 28:19,20).

Learn more:
http://watchtower.co.uk/e/jt/index.htm?article=article_04.htm
http://jw-media.org/people/ministry.htm

Answer 3

just say: Hi. Glad you're here. I'd like to see if you are interested in attending a function at my church next week. (Doesn't matter if it's true.) Make up some even, time and date and let them know if they show up, you will get points for magazine subscriptions and will help your kids or friends to attend a summer camp. When they say no, just say: ok. Thanks and close the door.

Answer 4

As a J.W.. I and my brothers and sisters want ' to save your life'.
We knock on your door because of;
(2 Peter 3:9) Jehovah is not slow respecting his promise, as some people consider slowness, but he is patient with YOU because he does not desire any to be destroyed but desires all to attain to repentance.

But once you know this and still insist that we do not call, then that is YOUR decision, AND WE AR NO LONGER "BLOOD GUILTY" for your life.
All you have to do is notify your nearest Kingdom Hall and advise them you wish to be placed on the "DO NOT CALL" list, and you will no longer be approached.
However, keep in mind that people change residences. You may. If you do would you be considerate enough to advise the Kingdom Hall, or the next J.W. you meet, and let them know.
If you do not let them know, do not be offended if one of the elders knocks on your door about every six months to check on whether there are new tenants or not.
They will not be chasing you.
They will be giving the 'possible' new tenants the opportunity to save themselves.
As cited...2 Peter 3;9.

Answer 5

Invite them in.
Be nice at all times.
Make them cuppa, insist if they refuse state it's a sign of dis-trust after all they want/impose themselves on you.

After ten words from seating really best to wait till they have drank the tea/coffee. tell them your religion is about not forcing `my`religion on others or forcing opinions on others in your eyes is the worst thing one person can do to your belief/religion system and is punishable by being force feed laxative tea after they have just drank the tea you first offered(without the laxative of course).

You will not see them again

Answer 6

keep a packet of alka seltzer handy and some green food colouring. When they ring your bell simply put the alka seltzer in your mouth and a drop of food colouring. Open the door and shout 'Be ElzE BUB am IIIIII' allowing green foam to fly from your mouth.

Glare at them hard and then shout an obscenity and slam the door.

If it doesn't work at least it will be pretty funny ;)

Answer 7

A lot of sex offenders, or potential sex offendersd answering today, as appearing nude in public is not conisdered a sex offense in most state. Also a few who want to ask for Satan's help.

The best way to learn what to do to stop JWs is to contact a synagogue and talk to the Rabbi.

Ask him how the ancient Jews got rid of the Christian Jews when they went from house to house telling their brethren that the beliefs, rituals, and holiday observances that they have followed for hundreds of years was no longer valid?

I’m sure they had ways to get rid of the Jews, who from their point of view, was a cult started by a Uneducated, Jewish Lower Class Carpenter, who was executed for cause by the governing authority. The only education he got was from his low class parents, Mary and Joseph. These followers were also uneducated Jewish lower class individuals, such as Peter, a failed fisherman, and Matthew, a hated tax collector.

Lacking any kind of education, let alone advance religious education, it was clear they were easily brainwashed into believing that the uneducated ex-carpenter was somehow the Messiah, which was clearly false as it was commonly known that when the Messiah came, he would destroy (Armageddon) the enemies of the true people of God, as foretold.

Saul of Tarsus, a highly educated individual in the religious arts, repeatedly proved they were a false religious sect and cult, creating their own scriptures (Bible) instead of relying on the Holy Torah, which had been used by the Jews for hundreds of years. Saul often stood by as the true believers of God stoned these so-called Christians for their door to door activities and spreading of false doctrine.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saul_of_Tarsus

Now, I would not recommend stoning, but they may have had other methods that worked to stop the house to house work and the spreading of false doctrine . What worked for them against the Christian cult may work against the JWs. At least you will be in good company in doing so.

Answer 8

There is one certain and simple but very effective way of making sure they never even knock do what I did in my last house ( in a tower block that had them calling on a 3wkly basis ) I hung a crucifix upside down on my front door and strangely they never knocked again

Answer 9

Tell them you're Jewish.

They won't even bother arguing the toss with you then, they'll just walk away. Works for my mother every time.

Answer 10

Yes as another person said, answer the door nude. I actually know somone who did this and they never came back.

The christian doctrine is to spread the gospel to as many people as they can. The bible commands them to do that. But once they tell you that fulfills their responsibility and all you have to say is that you have heard the gospel and have choosen to reject it.

I have also told one that I worship satan and another time I got all pissed and told them I was Roman Catholic and I am not going to let some door to door salesman shake the faith I have based my life on.

They all have worked well for me.