i can go to bed all sexy and he will just keep playing his ps2 and the times we do have sex after he's done he'll just turn around and go to bed! i even tell him that i need to be pleased and he will play the part but he is not even trining to please me it gets to the point were i just get up mad and walk out and sleep in the other room! if he was trining then wouldent he go talk to me about it instead of just going to sleep?
2007-05-03 23:44:42 · 24 answers · asked by skylaa 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
(we have three kids we been together for years. but we just wanted to make it final
2007-05-04 09:25:43 · update #1
(we have three kids we been together for years. but we just wanted to make it final that why we just got married. also sex was great before and no i have 100% no thoughts of him cheating on me)
2007-05-04 09:27:21 · update #2
Start now to teach him that sex is for the woman's pleasure, not the man's. He needs to learn to satisfy you and that an erection is not required on his part. Take control now, take away the Playstation & lay down the law, sister!
2007-05-05 04:01:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I know that this sounds kinda stupid but bear with me as I sift through my thoughts.
He has you so now why bother?
Or could it be that he was not ready for marriage and he is still a little freaked out so he prefers his video game reality to real life because at least he has control over it where when it comes to the married life he has three kids and felt like it was time to do the right thing by you and now he thinks things will change (which they don't).
Maybe he has preconceived notions about married life where people who are married do not have sex often (read some other questions in this forum). So he figures he doesn't have to put out the effort because married couples aren't suppose to have sex.
I wish he would talk to you because only he knows the real answer to this question. I think his going to sleep is just his way of not dealing with the situation.
Treat him like a child if he is acting like one. Hide his PS2 and tell him that until he talks to you about this and you get a satisfactory answer he can't get it back, Maybe that will work.
2007-05-11 23:30:23 · answer #2 · answered by bobbijoslin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are walking out and sleeping in another room then he sure as hell isn't going to want to have sex with you because you have now made it a very uncomfortable situation. I believe you should back off a bit and see if that helps. He may be worried about his new life with you how he will provide, there could be stress...my husband hits the computer games hard when he's stressed...for hours at a time.
I also hate to say when it comes to sex you have all the power, have you tried going down on him while he is playing his game? Or just just started playng around with him when he comes to bed. Men don't talk dear, you can tell him til your blue in the face what you want and he won't care...take action and he will pay attention.
If that doesn't work then you may just need to CALMLY ask if soemthing is bother him.
2007-05-04 00:09:22 · answer #3 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I have had the same problem. For a long time it really started to affect our relationship. I knew he wasn't cheating but I thought that it was me. It caused many arguments because I just knew that he no longer wanted me or for some reason it was linked to me, but he kept saying it wasn't and he did not understand what was going on. I made a dr's appointment for him and what we found out was his cholesterol was very high, which can bring down your sex drive greatly, he also was diabetic and has high blood pressure. Once he was on medication and got everything straight his sex drive returned to normal. Make an appointment for him to get checked. Im sure it is something that can be easily taken care of. Don't get to alarmed and don't let it effect your self esteem. Good luck and best wishes!
2016-04-01 08:00:56 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, after sex any man falls asleep, who cares. It's the way he's treating you before sex. It's not only about sex either.
That is the way a husband and wife will show their love for eachother, so I would be curious as to why he's acting like that.
Confront him about this and tell him why if you are making love to him, he doesn't want to make love to you, should you go to someone that will? Ask, what do I do?
You should get more respect than that. Don't run out of the room. Without fighting, stand there with your arms folded and ask alot of questions, such as; Do you love me? Do you want something to change in the way I make love? Are you happy in this marriage? Why don't you want to have sex? There are so many questions, just demand an answer. Don't let him think he could take away your pride and something that important from your marriage. Marriage is not one person deciding what he wants. It's both partners deciding what both want to make eachother happy. Good Luck
2007-05-04 00:10:01 · answer #5 · answered by Very Honest 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married a boy, not a man. Anyone who chooses PS2 over sex with his ready and willing wife is ... well, not very ... mature (I'm trying to be nice, he is your husband).
I'm lost on this one, because I'm not addicted to video games (which it sounds like your guy is). My suggestion would be, and this sounds sooooo unromantic, but may be necessary here, for you two to schedule when you two are going to have sex. Yeah, I know, it sounds horrible. But on these nights there will be NO PS2 at all - not before, during, or after. On these nights sex and each other, and drawing close to one other, is the only focus. He has to be totally focused on enjoying you and having you enjoying him. No distractions about high scores, or next levels, or "wait, I'm not at a save yet!" It's time for him to give you that same intensity between the sheets. Tell him you're just asking for one night a week of total focus. And ask him to hold you for some bonding time after sex (very important, as you obviously already realize), so you can feel valued and not just a sex toy.
Good luck and I wish you good sex and a deeper love with your husband.
2007-05-04 00:42:11 · answer #6 · answered by Dino 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am going to assume all was fine before you tied the knot. So...why don't you try this before confronting him bluntly about it. Sit down with him and play PS2 with him. Show an interest in one of his hobbies. That may make him look at you in a different light.
Oh, one question. Did he enthusiastically agree to marriage, or was it a "yeah, ok, whatever" response from him? Maybe he feels confined in a marriage he didn't want and didn't see a need for.
OK, if playing PS2 with him for a few weeks doesn't work, then I would bluntly ask him why he is not interested. Then seek counseling. Good luck.
2007-05-11 19:08:59 · answer #7 · answered by Guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he has always done this to you and you are just now catching on. He still has some growing up to do . My husband would never leave me hanging like that. What you need to do is back off for awhile. Even if that means you go buy yourself a toy. Let him know you can do things on your own. Once he sees that he cannot get away with treating you like this, he will stop. Don't put so much emphasis on sex. You don't need to get down to feel loved. As for the ps2 if it were me I would sell it! :)
2007-05-11 14:01:14 · answer #8 · answered by flateach33 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
May i suggest that You stop satisfying him. Tease him even more with Your sexiness and bring him to the brink, and then say, "No more tonight!" If he tries to relieve himself, tell him to stop. You can put a male chastity belt on him to prevent any self-pleasuring by him.
Next time You "get mad" don't "walk out", instead, give him the spanking he deserves. You deserve to be satisfied by him.
2007-05-04 01:11:18 · answer #9 · answered by utob 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try ordering you some HORNY GOAT WEED it's all natural and slip it to him a few hours earlier and then go about it!!! But if you've been with him for awhile, has he always done this? if so.. Don't think marriage is going to change him. IT NEVER DOES!!!
2007-05-11 15:52:22 · answer #10 · answered by patsy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋