Car accident changed life, need help?

Question

I was in a severe auto accident & it ****** up my back/neck & left leg. I've been & still am being treated for my injuries. I'm only able to work part time now, unable to ride my motorcycle now, hard to walk/stand very long, can't run, have chronic pain, have had to give up my position as Asst. Chief of a search & rescue team & stop doing all calls with them. I'm still a member, however can only do executive work only now. Ive been told I will have permament damage from my back & will have sciatica for the rest of my life, as a few vertabraes including the one causing the sciatica can't be fixed do to a previous spinal fusion/implant surgery. My question is, I am having a really hard time coping with the loss of function & not being able to be active like I was. I'm only 23 & don't want to live this way. What can I do for that I can feel better about being partially disabled for rest of my life, when I've always been active? My problems are from the car accident, not my back surgery.

Answer 1

this is exactly what im going through. I just turned 24. Have you been tested for fibromyalgia? I have fibro, sciatica, arthritis and spinal stenosis from my MVA in July 2003. I know what its like to have your life cut down in seconds. I was home on leave from the Army when I got hurt. Try to see a pain management specialist, and maybe even a therapist or support group. Add me if you want- you can talk to me any time on IM.

Answer 2

I am sorry for your loss of mobility. When I was young I could not be very active due to physical limitations but I worked within them. Lots of pain and suffering. Easier for me as I had it from birth. Much harder lesson when you loose your ability to be youthful and vigorous. May I suggest instead of feeling sorry for your condition, count your blessings,: You are not paralyzed, you r are not blind, you have a certain amount of function. Make a list of all the positive things in your life and work on that. Choose something each week or month to work on. Look around and find someone worse off than yourself, then be thankful you are not in diapers and cannot use your limbs. This is not a criticisim just a way to help you feel better. MEditate and do biofeedback. See your injuries healing, see yourself becoming more active. 30 minutes per day imagining these things. Do light exercises to strengthen your back. There is an electronic pain device that works miracles call MVT wand. I have one. Also the B Vitamins and CAlcium and Magnesium with C and D help.
I had end stage Multiple Myeloma (Worst form of bone cancer possible with unimaginable pain) this helped me tremedously. I lost all my thoracic spine and lumbar discs...So I can relate. No I am not a kid anymore but it still hurts.
So do these things and you will feel better..All the best

Answer 3

I can relate. I was in a near fatal car accident about 20 years ago. Like you, I suffered serious, life changing injuries. But I was only 16 at the time. I was as level one as a level one trauma could get...barely alive with only a miracle to save me. Obviously, I did survive but I still have problems to this day.

My internal injuries resulted in type 1 diabetes. I have problems with my knees and my back. I had memory problems. My face, abomen, knee and back are scarred. I have to have extensive plastic and dental surgery to put me back together. I will never have children.

Aside from all of that, I put my life back together, overcame my injuries and moved on. It was really hard. It was an extended recovery and at times I didn't think I would make it. I got very depressed. The pain and frustration I went through contributed to becoming a heavy drinker and ultimately, an alcoholic. I'm happy to say I have been sober for 15 years. I'm fortunate that I did not abuse drugs.

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that while your recovery will be hard and frustrating and slow, you will be able to eventually recover to a level of function that you can live with. No, you may not be as physically active as before. You may have to make a career change. Over time, you will find new activities that may be even more fulfilling. For instance, I substituted water activities, weightlifting, hiking and fishing for the downhill skiing, volleyball rock climbing and white water rafting I used to do.

I will also add that I became an EMT AFTER all of this. I can meet the physical requirements and I love what I do.

I've been really lucky. I recovered my life...maybe not to the same extent but it's a life I'm happy with and is fulfilling to me. I hope the same happens for you. Take your time. You might want to think about counseling. I did seek it and it helped.

You can email me if you want to talk...from one accident survivor to another.

EMT

Answer 4

Hi,
To use the old stand-by...sorry about your back, etc. Now for some real facts.
1. Sciatica is NOT permanent! When the swelling goes down the pain will stop. I have had it on and off for 21 years after a fall on a marble floor.

2. You will ride your bike again, it may be awhile but it can happen.

3. Chronic pain needs a pain management specialist, they are God sends.

4. You are only as disabled as you want to be.

5. Part time work is better than none at all. Without you doing the Executive work what would your team loose out on? Your still part of a team that needs you.

For now find things you can do...
..volunteer at school and tell little kids about your exciting life doing search and rescue, one of them may follow in your footsteps, who knows who they may save.
...learn to cook
...do what you did after your first back surgery
...get a service puppy for a year, all that walking will do you good and training him\her will get your mind on other things

Answer 5

There is always something you can find. The best thing to do since your long range mobility is limited is to find a hobby that will keep your interest and keep you going. It could be anything from models to learning an instrument. Don't get into a rut, only depression will come from that.

Answer 6

First, you can be a bit more respectful when referring to you back and neck injury. Not everyone uses that kind of language and it is quite inappropriate.
I think you need to be thankful that you are alive and not in worse condition. There are many who live on life support and are unable to do anything for themselves. You state that you can do some work. Be thankful for this and work on your attitude. Many people of all ages have things happen that are not fair, but we have to live with them and live and work with limitations. Good luck.

Answer 7

that lady meant that it changed her life in an emotional way (her perspective of life). the one's you're saying are changing life in a physical way. i don't think many people get emotional over a bowl of cereal or peeing... that would be a bit strange... and the forever part is just a saying to mean 'for the rest of my life' May i ask what movie it is?

Answer 8

well.. i know this isn't going to help, but in the long run, what is done is done. I would recommend getting counseling and/or rehab (if it will help at all).. furthermore, try finding something you enjoy doing.. I'm very athletic and love sports and i cannot even begin to imagine being in your position.. greatest sympathies go out to you man