My mom is driving me nuts what should i do?

Question

i love my mom but we are just too alike. im sick of living unorganized and everyone says its jsut a phase im going through bcz im 16 but im so sick of doing everything her way. she is completely disorganized and anytime i try to do anything different then the way she thinks i should do it i get screamed at. i cant wait to be on my own but im sick of all the drama. i dont want to ruin our relationship over something like this. what do i do?


p.s. have i mentioned she is a control freak?

k the problem is that when i try to talk to her she says its back talk and backslaps me.
also i have tried talking to her and she calls me a selfish brat

as for money wise i pay for all my bills except for rent and water so on.. anything i need clothes wise and food i pay for myself and i pay for all my pets. so dont start with me on that.

also she knicks and picks at EVERYTHING i do.. she makes me feel inadequate. and blames me for things that go wrong. ilove her but im just so sick of her fake bull ****

Answer 1

talk to her.
tell her she's driving you nuts sometimes. I tell that to my mom. I'll be like "MOM! The more you yell the more stressed we'll both be"
tell her she doesn't need to yell all the time and freak out over little things. Reassure her that you are not going to screw up and let her know you're doing right. Tell her she needs to trust you and explain to her that you're being good.
Always let her know who you're with, where you're going etc... that way she'll feel secure.

my mom's the same way, I'm 17, trust me it works.
good luck!

Answer 2

Actually, it's great that at your age you are organized! That's a trait more people should have & fewer mistakes would be made. You know what you're doing, why, & where things are. She has to see that in you & maybe since she's NOT that way, it upsets her knowing you have it together but she doesn't. I would be proud of my daughter for being what you say you are. Are you sure she is a "control freak" OR is it just that being a mother, of course "we" tend to tell our children what or what not to do. If so, that's the way it's coming over to you that she's trying to control you instead of you taking it as corrective criticism or her just teaching you what to do or what not to do in your life. See if you can pick a time when things are "calm" & explain your feelings to her. Just tell her sometimes you feel you should be able to judge what's best for you, not all the time, but at least ask her to give you a chance once in awhile & tell her that's the only way you're going to learn. I don't think that is too unfair to ask. Don't wish your life away by being hasty in wanting to be on your own. I'm sure after going thru the hard knocks of life myself, I'd wished I was living back home in the "protection" of my parents...yea, believe it or not you'll wish that at least once in your life! Good luck & try to do it in adult way by discussion.

Answer 3

Have you tried overloading the system? If she wants control - give it to her. Ask her advice or her permission before you do ANYTHING? Should I take a shower now or later? Should I wash my hair first or last? What color towel should I use? Should I cut my meat into little pieces all at once or only one at a time? What do you think the weather will be tomorrow? Should I sleep with my window open or closed? And on and on and on. When she protests - in all innocence - say "But I thought that's what you wanted. You seem to want to control every decision I make, and our relationship is too important to me to be fighting all the time, so I'm just giving you the decisions."

See if that gets her attention.

Answer 4

I have a friend with some of the same problems. She and her mom get along fine now, but taking some alone time each day is really a good idea. You might want to spend some time with her just bonding together. Then you'll be able to appreciate her if you make a conscious effort not to argue with her.

Answer 5

Thank God that you still have your mother. And realize that when you have a child they will feel the same about you.

You can't wait until you are on your own, well starting saving every penny, like that you won't have to run back the unorganized mother to bail you out when you need money.

Answer 6

i have the same problem, my mom can be a crazy *A* hole to me sometimes, and i'm almost 19. she'll probably never stop, 'ive yelled at her and told her to stop, i even told her to shut up, i've tried to logically discuss it with her, but she's just a crazy rude person at times.......you'll just have to live with it unfortunatly........it blows :( but you should try to be positive and not let an occasional rudeness make you hate your mom, but don't let you're love blind you to her stupidity ;D

Answer 7

She's a disorganized control freak? That doesn't make sense.

Answer 8

Tell her, or just let her know that she can trust U! Let her know that U are nearly a woman and U want to act like one!

Answer 9

ha, every 16 year old thinks their moms are contorl freaks, just be your own person, show her your good at what you are, be yourself. She cant stop you from having you own personality.

Answer 10

try and resolve the issue by sitting down and talking to her and telling her how you feel. tell her not to yell at you and that you want to be organized and see how it goes from there