If two people are in love and truly love each other. But one was married, but had never loved their partner, should a divorce take place and the two in love be together?
2007-05-03 10:33:22 · 14 answers · asked by Monkey Dancer 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
For one thing. I'm a guy, so it's no ones husband.
2007-05-03 22:56:48 · update #1
And... I'm not married.
2007-05-03 22:59:20 · update #2
It can be hard to find perspective when feelings are strong, but that is when it is more important than anything - so asking the question to get some advice was very wise.
I'm no expert, these are simply my views - hope they are helpful to you.....
First, remember that there is a third person here, and a lot of real damage that could result. (I've seen first hand a number of people in this category and seen what happens. Putting yourself in his/her position how would you want to be treated?)
Love never fails. But love is not a feeling, it is a way of living which puts the other person first "your good at my expense". There is no situation that love cannot transform - even a marriage that is devoid of these kind of feelings. (This kind of love is more likely to save a marriage than conquer it - which may not be the answer you wanted to hear).
Faithfulness and integrity (doing what you committed to do) are key to any relationship. In marrying someone you commit to "forsake all others" for that person.
Ultimately, decide what kind of person you want to be - live and make decisions led by your values not your feelings.
The best book I've ever come accross in this area is the excellent "His needs, her needs". Read the first 35 pages and reflect on it to help you to think things through.
Best wishes as you work it out.
2007-05-03 11:00:04 · answer #1 · answered by Pilgrim 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Such a difficult question! Its easy to say that if you are married you should stay together whatever...but I don't necessarily agree. I was married 25 years, we married when we were both young but over the years I felt we had less and less in common. I did leave and met someone else. I don't regret my decision and although my ex now hates me with a passion, I think it would have been cruel to stay with him - he deserved more than I could give him.
As for the "new partner", you have to be 100% sure that you want to be with this person. My advice would be to live on your own for a while initially. Then make the decision before rushing into another relationship. Good luck and I hope that one day you find the happiness that I did.x
2007-05-03 10:53:26 · answer #2 · answered by MrandMrs 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the partner loves the man, then it's a really tough question. Because you may be hurting her a lot. But the person who is in love (the couple and the other person) should be asked one question:
Am I ready to grab a gun and point it at my head and shoot? If not, then I am not in love. It's a major point. If that person can do it, they love them. And the partner should be asked the same question (by anyone) would they do that for the person they love.
If the partner answers no, they should divorce and the couple who love each other should marry (if there are no children involved)
2007-05-03 10:43:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
is the married person telling the truth or does he or she like the best of both worlds if there is definitely no love there then why stay there get out and find true love good luck
2007-05-03 11:04:09 · answer #4 · answered by susan will of the wisp 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes true love can conquer all and anyway nobody should stay in a marriage where there is no love.
2007-05-03 20:38:54 · answer #5 · answered by valerie_adele 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if you are going with a married man and he has said i never loved my wife i love you he is lying and even if he does leave his wife he will do the same to you what goes around comes around stay away from peoples husbands
2007-05-03 10:40:43 · answer #6 · answered by cookie1231 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
In that instance NO. For reality they would not have married if they had no love for the person they are with. It sounds to me if this is you that you have a unhealthy infatuation with someone from your past!
2007-05-03 10:44:45 · answer #7 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
One should never leave their spouse for another love conquest.
Let the person who has the dilema, work out their problems and then if the marriage doesn't work, then that person needs to work on themselves to have successful relationships.
Why would anyone want someone who would cheat on their spouse? Don't you think they would cheat on you?
2007-05-03 10:39:21 · answer #8 · answered by lwheavenlyangel 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
no.love does not conquer all only you can make things happen love is just a feeling. you should have not gotten married if you didnt have those feelings for your wife. be repsonible and suffer teh consequesnces by staying married and cutting that other woman out of your life.
2007-05-03 10:38:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
well that person was once in lov with her/his husband and now all of a suden they rnt? and supposbley got true lov for someone else? am sorry to break it to ya but that dont happen that is not true lov for now its just lust and it will end later on just like it did for that persons significant other and u dont want that person to lose feelings for u and go thru all that trouble so leave that person and move on
2007-05-03 10:41:23 · answer #10 · answered by I_got_the_wow_effect 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋