I'd like to show/tell him how proud of him I am. He's been thru some very rough times (divorce, moving a lot, death of loved ones, mental and physical abuse, not from me of course!!) and I want to tell him how well he's turned out after all he went thru!!! He's the 1st one in family to go to college!
2007-05-03 07:41:41 · 5 answers · asked by ♥bigmamma♥ 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hey Bigmama - congratulations to your son (and to you)! I think a simple sit down between the two of you either at home or over a dinner at some restaurant should accomplish your goal. If it is at home - have some coffee and use the morning or evening (your choice) when no one is on the "rush" or the "go". If you go to some restaurant an evening where the crowds won't show up, i.e. choose a Mon-Wed as opposed to a Fri-Sun.
Either way a simple momento that allows him to keep something to remember the conversation by - something that will last and be a special memory for him (these things do not have to cost a lot or be big ticket items - just something lasting - you choose as you know your son best and his likes or dislikes - consider even taking a camera to have the waiter or someone take a photo of the two of you, then YOU keep that photo in a special place to give to him after he graduates!).
Life can deal some hard blows to good people - glad to see we still have people that can rise above the garbage it can bring. A mere suggestion - as you congratulate him on his accomplishments do not linger too much on what he has been through but focus your conversation on him, his goals, how proud you are of him, and what the world will offer him as he leaves college later - tell him to take a couple of Spring Vacations with friends as well.
Job well done Mom! In the past things were out of your control - so NO BEAT UP ON ONESELF ALLOWED FOR YOU EITHER! Let him bring home his laundry from time to time, and ask him to share his most important papers with you - he might think this is corny now - but that little toddler you once held is the young man on his road.
Speaking from a little experience in this matter.
Best of luck to you and your boy!
2007-05-03 07:57:29 · answer #1 · answered by Gerry 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Did you divorce him considering which you had to pass to the bars or have a fling..or some thing like that? Or did you divorce him simply by fact he became insufferable to stay with? And why did you're able to pay baby help...he could have paid his share of baby help. You did no longer say why he had you put in detention center. i will permit you be attentive to this plenty...if he became abusing you....you're able to have no REGRETS approximately divorcing him..no count what YOUR SON SAYS. Did you place your son by way of hell...or became it your husband harrassing you that made it hell for him? I lived by way of an abusive marriage for 10 years. My remorseful approximately is that I stayed with him all those years. My existence and my son's existence could have been completely distinctive..and that i'm particular extra effective. yet you quite often think of issues are going to alter. they frequently basically worsen. might it have been extra effective in case you hadn't divorced him? I do remorseful approximately that my son did no longer have a father. He became killed in an twist of destiny some year and a a million/2 after our divorce. do no longer permit your son break the the remainder of your existence. He probably picked up an excellent style of "strategies" from seeing how his father dealt with you. You 'd think of he'd learn from it..yet no longer constantly. with a bit of luck your son gets married (if he's not already) and concentration on his new relatives. you're able to take this time for your self...to be reliable to your self. and end thinking you should be punished. you do no longer. in case you probably did...you have served your "time". reliable success.
2016-12-10 18:25:37 · answer #2 · answered by bednarz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him know that the trials and tribulations which he had to surpass all happened to make him the strong man that he has become. Sometimes we have to hit bumpy roads to remind us that there are good times ahead of us so keep on riding through the bumpy roads... You can't get stuck cuz you'll never get to where you must go...
2007-05-03 07:48:02 · answer #3 · answered by Please help 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
buy him a really nice journal as a gift and write how you feel in it. He can keep it forever and remember the rough times and how he made it so far. If he feels up to it he can express himself in it when he feels ready!
* Maybe stick a gift card in it to his favorite store as well!
2007-05-03 07:51:19 · answer #4 · answered by Namom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First to go to college! Hats off to him!!!!! You should be proud!!! : )
2007-05-03 07:46:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋