We do it for 3 days straight and that is all he can do. He gets limp with the thought of having to do the deed when i am fertile. How can I change his mindset? I dont want to do it every other day, what do you recommend?
2007-05-03 06:55:32 · 17 answers · asked by Diggy 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
you gots ta spice up the sex life!
I'm talking whip cream, chocolate syrup with blindfolds, crotchless panties, edible panties, role playing, kitchen counter animal sex.
forget that your trying to conceive cuz he's not gonna find that a turn on, give him something to yearn for when he's at work like leave him sexy msgs. having a baby could be the sexiest thing for the two of you. just don't pressure him at all about it cuz guys are trained to think that a baby is the worse possible consequence of sex so you're gonna need to be patient with him. it'll all happen when its supposed to
2007-05-03 07:05:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The one thing I recommend is to relax. I understand the desire for a child is strong and you both want it as soon as possible but the more pressure you put on yourselves and each other, the less likely you'll be successful.
One thing he may be focussing on is what happens if we do it now when she's fertile and we don't get pregnant? Does that mean there is something wrong with me? these questions will put an enormous amount of pressure on him and impact his performance.
If you both try (on the days where you are fertile) to go into it with a similar attitude to what you used to before you were trying to conceive, you may find that he (and you) are more successful.
I wish you both the best of luck
2007-05-03 07:02:42 · answer #2 · answered by tyger_willow 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think its the pressure or maybe he is working to hard at work and dont have no energy. My husband work night shift and when Im ready he is tired and he hate it when I pressure him when he's tired so I wait and do it on his off days. He's not like this all the time but if we do have sex on the days he have to work he complains about how tired he is at night. Talk to him maybe he dont want to get his hopes up if you all been trying for so long he probably thinks its not going to happen. My husband also felt that way until I got pregnant which was a surprise and had a miscarriage. The day I had the miscarriage is when we found out. Now that he know we can get pregnant he looks at it different.
sending lots of baby dust!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-05-03 07:05:49 · answer #3 · answered by lovely 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Having to perform on a schedule can be a big turn-off for a guy! I can empathize with your husband, as my wife and I had a similar situation a while back.
The problem is, the object is suddenly about having a baby and, while there is nothing inherently wrong with that, it is not erotic or sensual. Suddenly, he is not the object of the passion.
My best advice is not to discuss your fertile times or conception in general as it relates to the actual sex act. Try to make it seem spontaneous and sexy.
2007-05-03 07:28:11 · answer #4 · answered by thedrewder 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you are having a hard time getting pregnant, use an ovulation kit to predict when you are fertile and then seduce him, dont make him feel pressured. If it isreally bad keep sex fun by having it spontaneously as well as scheduled for conception, or having it in a new, exciting place, likeon the couch or something.
2007-05-03 07:02:26 · answer #5 · answered by kaseysospacey 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well that is what they recommend, its actually not good to do it everyday because you are depleting the sperm count, meaning that aren't as strong as if you would just do it every other day. Sperm can live up to 5 days the doctors say, just use OPK's and when you are ovulating just make sure to have sex 2 or 3 good times.
2007-05-03 07:00:21 · answer #6 · answered by echc 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't do it for too many days in a row; it may be putting too much pressure on your relationship. Besides; his sperm count will be higher if you have "breaks". Get an ovulation predictor method in place and concentrate on seducing him when your fertility peaks. The rest will be fun.
2007-05-03 07:01:42 · answer #7 · answered by Rocky Raccoon 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Make it fun for him! Get some sexy lingerie or maybe some of the warming lube. Use foreplay or role play something to get his imagination going! Buy a sex game from Spencer's or the bookstore. Make him feel like its not his responsibility to just get you prego but make him feel like he wants to please you and that you are going to have a whole lot of fun doing it! My husband and I got a game from Barnes and Noble it should be the first one on the list at this website! http://search.barnesandnoble.com/booksearch/results.asp?WRD=sex+play&z=y&r=1&cds2Pid=9481 If all of that doesn't work then try Viagra!
2007-05-03 07:07:35 · answer #8 · answered by katsfamily07 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe because he feels like you are using him. It's stupid I know but men don't think like we do. Take the pressure off of him by making it more fun. Try things that you never would have thought you would do. I think you need to stroke his ego a little bit. Good luck.
2007-05-03 07:00:48 · answer #9 · answered by Jamie B 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
i dont see why u dont want to do every other day..the sperm can live up to 5days inside of u, so if u do every other day u can still have the same chances to conceive.
2007-05-03 07:00:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋