Sleep after fight?

Question

Today my husband seemed to have an attitude since I got back from the store, right after he got home from work, so basically all day. Ignored me, was short with me and angry and even with our young son. He just seemed to have somthing wrong all day, and ignored me and invited friends over. And like usual they didnt leave until midnight and he went to get in bed right away. I followe him and tryed to confront him but letting him know that he really hurt my feelings with some of the things he said and the way he acted. And I had a really long day and needed help and he was just an *** all day. But I tryed to talk about it and he got mean again and made it all out to be my imagination and/or my fault. Anyways somehow trying to talk about things turned into a huge fight and I ended up in tears in the livingroom. I have a hard enough time falling alseep as it is, but how do I go back to sleep(in our full size bed) sad and unhappy, wanting nothing more than to cuddle and have him apologize.

Reading previous question might help... But also, what should I do tomorrow, since nothing with get "solved" tonight?

I understand everyone needs their own space. But I did not go into detail. Here's the detail. There is someone here everyday. Frome between the time he gets home to right before our son goes to bed. (never after like i request) and stay until at least midnight in the garage smoking pot or drinking (i dont need any lectures now, so please spare me) until he's ready to go straight to bed. at least 6 nights out of the week.

He didnt have a bad day at work. I brought him lunch on hisbreak and he was having a great day, and Im already a slight insomniac as it is... so sleeping in itself is hard, any ideas how I could go to sleep faster n worry about this tomorrow or sothing?

Answer 1

think of all the mean things he said to you.then you get angry where u don't care if he's sleeping with u or not.If u did nothing wrong and he's being a jerk for no reason,he'll realize it. Sometimes you gotta turn off the emotions and say this too shall pass,P.S tell him it's your house too and you are fed up with the constant company,and under no circumstances should he ever take his bad days out on u and your young son, as for the drinking and smoking,maybe he should cut back, for the sake of his family. good luck to u

Answer 2

i know this goes against every instinct, but i try to apologize first. it's impossible to sleep on a full sized bed when there's an issue (i know: i have a full sized bed and an ornery, sometimes grumpy husband too.) even if you believe you did nothing wrong, he could have thought that there was some intention behind something you did innocently. try to talk to him by saying, "babe, did i do something wrong? are you upset at me about something? what can i do to fix this?" like i said, it's the LAST THING we want to do when they've been a pain all day, but it really works for me. it's not until i've apologized that he's able to say where he's gone wrong. call it male pride, call it what you will, but you know very well that he can steam all night and ignore it while you lay there uncomfortable. the issue needs to be resolved before you sleep... that's probably the best marital advice someone can give. :)

Answer 3

she is learning how to be comfortable in the big outside world. She was very cosy and warm in her familiar womb.. now that she's out, she doesn't yet know how to stay asleep. here's some ways that may help her to stay asleep: - play white noise (radio between stations) or soft music on a cd. If she has the same sound playing when she falls asleep while she goes through the different cycles of sleep, it will soothe her. - pat her and teach her to self soothe. When you put her to bed, roll her on her side and pat her bottom or her lower back LIGHTLY until she stops crying, then roll her back to her back. if she cries, roll and pat. if she wakes up 15mins later, roll and pat. only pat until the crying stops (try not to pat her to sleep!). she will learn that you are there for her, you will come if she needs you, that she is safe falling asleep in her cot/crib/bassinette and that she can fall asleep on her own. - swaddle her. wrap her tightly in a baby wrap, with arms and legs tucked in tightly (always leave loose around her shoulders/neck however). swaddling helps baby feel secure. it stops the startle reflex, and helps keep baby snug, warm and feeling safe. best of luck :)

Answer 4

I had same problem too, but I found out once a person in a bad mood no matter how hard you are trying, won't work....just leave it, it take times....let it go first, wait until he feel he was really bad, things will be better, and for yourself?~ We are women, ok? Love yourself more, if you don't sleep, you will get really urgly face in the next morning, at the same time, you feel in a bad mood too.....so better sleep first, don't think about it first, sleep is the time to recharge yourself and relationship. (If you don't want to you can sleep by yourself in the other room : )

Answer 5

This is sometimes hard to hear, but from a guy's point of view, sometimes when a guy is having a rough day, just hangin out with friends helps. I wish there was something I could say that will make it go away, but I feel that sometimes a guy needs a little space with friends to get his mind off of what's bothering him.

Answer 6

Let him cool down then approach him again when he's already level headed. Maybe he had a problem at work and was upset by it. Main thing is get it resolved once and for all. You don't want this issue coming up again in the future when you have another fight.

Answer 7

When you see him, give him a hug and a kisss and tell him you hope he has a great day and that you love him. Let it go. We all have bad days. If he does it again, then go off on him. Tell him you're trying to be understanding but that doesn't give him the right to take it out on you when you haven't even done anything wrong. Communicate!

Answer 8

I think 80% of your problems are drug and alcohol related. Drink some OJ and eat something sweet, that'll bring you down.
The other 20% of your problems are from neither of you two growing up yet, expecting instant rewards. Part of the reason your have drug and alcohol issues. Your insomnia may be just a side effect.

Answer 9

You have difficulties sleeping because you have thoughts and worries going around in your mind. Having a row with your husband just before going to sleep certainly doesn't help but I think men aren't bothered that much as us women do to loose their sleep over some row.

Answer 10

your husband may have other issues that he is upset about, they most likely be work related, I think he takes his frustrations out on you and the family...lt allows him to vent, even put blame for his issues on you...then he ends up being able to sleep better...which unfortunately leaves you all worked up and unable to sleep...you need to convey this is not ok with you...by going to bed and cuddling , its saying its ok..nothing is going to change...why not get a bowl of ice cream and settle in the living room and watch television until you fall asleep....he needs to know it bothers you...even if it takes you to do something out of the ordinary.