how do i forgive myself?

Question

did some dumb things in life. i believe God and the people harmed have forgiven me, but still carry the baggage because i am unable to forgive myself.

Answer 1

A friend recently called me up and we were discussing this very issue of guilt and regret for past deeds. She teaches English Lit and was sharing a quote from Macbeth (yes we did actually make reference to Shakespeare in a phone conversation) where he talks about washing the blood off his hands but finds that there is no body of water large enough to rinse his hands clean. We spoke about how often it is that you carry your guilt, regrets and memories with you - often reliving them. They become part of you. The only thing I could suggest is to learn from your mistakes and do good works. Your regret is there for a purpose. Help others. For God has consigned all men to disobedience, that he may show his mercy to all' Romans Chapter 11, verse 32.

Answer 2

If you cannot forgive yourself, then there is some guilt left. Feeling guilty usually means that you secretly think that there's still someone somewhere who hasn't forgiven you. There is no use assuming that people have forgiven you. Call them up and apologize, in person if at all possible. You may have to endure some verbal or even physical assault. Turn the other cheek. It's the ONLY way to unburden yourself. As for God, He works in mysterious ways..

Answer 3

I can relate. I have done many things in my life that i regret.
Have you talked to the people? From my experience it really helps to reach out to them and tell them how you feel. If they have already forgiven you, maybe talk to them about how you cant forgive yourself. They will most likely reasure you that there is nothing to worry about. Set aside some time to think about what you did, and why you did it. Once you have clearly established this, think of ways that you can prevent doing anything similar again in the future. Try as hard as you can to not make the same mistakes again, and live your life with no regrets.

I hope you can find peace with yourself.
Good luck :)

Answer 4

heres the best thing you can do.
when you ask for forgiveness its not just from others, you have to want to be forgiven. if they have forgiven you then do what i do..say to yourself.."im sorry I've done this_________, and i will never do it again."
now let it go. the next time it enters your mind think only about happy things.
remember don't sweat the small stuff. if you've done something that can be forgiven by others then it must not have been so bad. learn from your mistake and move forward. you'll soon see how much stronger things like this will make you.
good luck to you!

Answer 5

That's really hard because you can't say i'm sorry to yourself and expect yourself to answer you back and say you're forgiven and then feel better about it. Stop blaming yourself, that's the key. All of us commit mistakes, you're not the only one who did a wrong thing here. Unfortunately, I can't say anything that can help you forgive yourself. Only you can do it, at the right time. I suggest that you wait till you don't feel too bad and too guilty then just forget about it and be happy.

Answer 6

Your mind is keeping you in the same groove...rethinking, rethinking all the "stuff". It is possible to pay attention to when the mind starts a 'drama''...if you don't feed more thoughts in, you will find that the story fades away.

We create a lot of our own misery because we allow the mind to take us on ramages. Most people do not realize that they contribute to their own suffering by 'feeding' the mind more thoughts...be alert, don't do this!

For awhile, it will feel like you've turned the TV off...the chattering mind will be more quiet. You need to change the habit of churning things over and over again! Develop the habit of a more quiet mind. You will be happier!

We, in a strange way, like our suffering....we are used to it...it is 'comfortable' and only we can notice and change this behavior.

Answer 7

Inorder to forgive yourself yo have to realize what you have done right your wrongs and then ask yourself if you feel as if you did right. You have to see the positive outcome and you have to keep telling youself it'll be alright and life will go on things will get better. If you already know your forgiven by others you have to build the strength to forgive youself.

Answer 8

Sounds like you might have some extra thinking time on your hands and it might be best to think of other things. Everyone has done bad or dumb things they regret ,however they will look back no to down themselves but to think of it as a learning experience. You wont do them again and thats what really counts. Put the time spent on thinking of your dumb moves to persecute yourself toward thinking of ways to help others.Spending time with family can be really rewarding for them and in return for yourself. Best wishes.

Answer 9

Tough question...Very good question!
Sometimes, we're our worse enemies when it comes to forgiving ourselves. You'll need to "come to terms" with yourself and realize that your a very special person. Why?? Because, the people who have forgiven you(along with the Big Guy)love you. It's pretty simple when you become "enlightened" with this. You'll see the transformation not only in your thinking, but also your spirit will soar with joy because your back loving yourself.

Answer 10

Forgiveness is unnecessary. The key lies in not blaming the self and to stop punishing the self.

The secondary issue is making a decision not to do to others again what lead to the guilt in the first place.