How do I get my my wife to stand on her own two feet?

Question

I make more money than my wife, but I feel my wife could earn more if she tried harder.
I have a medical condition that will only get worse and can't get life insurance because of it.
I want to look out for my family, but in all truth don't have enough time to set things the way I would want them to be. So how do I get my wife step up and do what needs to be done?

Answer 1

Hello. These days duel incomes are more important and needed. Give her the book "Rich Woman" by Kim Kiyosaki. It discusses the issues you mentioned and get women to think about their financial situations and how important it is that they control or at least understand certain parts of their financial lives. It's a great book that is more of a friendly, conversational read but offers great "real life stories" and advice tailored to women. Very inspirational.

Answer 2

You start out here telling us how GOOD you are and what YOU desire. ! That's Fantastic,in five lines telling us your story you have used ' I', 6 times, and' My Wife', 3 times, so its no wonder she doesn't earn the same as you , she is only " half as good". Its unfortunate you have an illness ,and its extremely honourable of you, to be looking ahead to the importance of your famil'ys future and well being. If your wife has read this question, she would have every right to feel in away 'put down' . If you really need her to earn more , begin by giving her a "reputation" to live up to. Make deposits in her self esteem "account ," make her feel IMPORTANT! someone, or something has made you feel that way, and you could be amazed at the results, if you can at least make your wife feel just as "worthy" as you. The very best of luck with your health and family.

Answer 3

I was in somewhat of ur wifes situation - my ex finace took care of everything -financially, house maintance, emotionally - I let him do it cause I was pretty much too lazy to offer to do it if someone else was doing it for me...My ex wanted to pay for me to go to school but I never did i think it was cause i didnt know what i wanted to do and cause i was scared -
what u need to do is a less dramatic thing that my ex did -

i am assuming u have talked to her and told her how u feel - if u didnt thats ur first step - tell u its gonna wear u out phy. and emotionally - - chances are if she is like me talking and asking wqont do much - maybe she will start to change but it wont last... so the next step is to almost scare the crap out of her - all the talking in the world may not change her - what made me finally rea;lize i needed to change was him telling meit was over and he wanted me to move out and that i did the day after - in my case it was too late - i wore him down so much i prob. cant get him back now - u need to maike her think that it already too late- that may be the only way she will stand up and do it -
dont let her get away with things - some people will take and take as long as ur giving - without knowing or really understanding how hard and bad it is for the other person- its not that she is a bad person or that she doesnt love u - she just needs to find the motivation - the idea of losing u may be what gives her that -
Has she ever been diagnosed with depression or anyhting like that - thats helps take motivation from the person and also makes it easier to not help out when they know deep down someone needs it -
i hope it works out -
I understand how frustrated u must be - please try at least talking and maybe hints that u may leave - if all else fails - leave her before u hate her and b4 its too late - it will kill both of u but it may be the lick in the butt she needs - I wish my ex had left me b4 he had nothing left - good luck

Answer 4

First of all you took that role of being the bread winner right and has your wife always worked? plus she just could be comfortable with the money she makes what are you trying to prove? or is this all show and tell for other people like friends and family? and im sorry but we all get comfortable in any relationship good or bad.

Answer 5

Communication.

Find out what her goals and ambitions are. If she is content working as she is, then it would not be good for her to try to change it. It may be frustrating.

Do you earn enough to support the household? If so, let your wife work as she needs to in order to fulfill her role as wife and mother. If she pushes herself in order to advance, she may sacrifice that which is instinctly important to a woman.

There may be some regret in not advancing one's career, but a bigger regret is a mother who had little time for her family.

Answer 6

Sit down and talk to her. She is going to have to pull her own weight eventually. Maybe she doesn't understand your concerns and doesn't take it seriously...talk to her

Answer 7

I think you should tell her just what said in your question.

Answer 8

you should just let her know .