How will the Democrats convince the terrorists to be nice? What's the plan?

Question

I have never heard anything from the democrats about how they would handle the problem of global terrorism. Do they know there is a problem?

Answer 1

Don't be so smug, Mr. Smarty Pants. We Democrats have a fool proof plan to live in blissful harmony with those innocent goat herders you so disparagingly refer to as "terrorists".

It is a well known fact that cute little puppy doggies can melt the heart of even the most hardened career criminal. That is why they are being used in prisons to mollify the incarcerated. We plan to take a shipment of cute-as-a-button puppies to all the jihadist hot spots, and their mercurial bad mood and vitriolic temper will melt like an ice cube in the desert sun.

It is also a well known fact that most of these pacifist-at-heart Muslims are crazy about Jane Fonda. In most Jihadist training camps, they have fotos on the wall of her from the movie "Barbarella", just like WWII sailors had photos of Greta Garbo and Jane Mansfield pinned up over their bunks.

I have heard that at the training camps, it is common to hear a jihadist whispering to himself at night, "I'd gladly break a few verses of the Koran to see what's under that burka!"

Jane is itching to make up for a grievous error she made with the North Vietnamese. Back in the 1970's, she tried the puppy approach over there, forgetting that the Vietnamese don't have dogs as pets, they eat dogs. Poor Jane.

So, Jane Fonda and a cast of Hollywood luminaries are going over there. Soon, terrorists from Islamabad to the suburbs of Baghdad will be cooing like little children, playing with frisky little puppy doggies. Jane plans to have a big hippie party, and they're all going to sing "Kumbaya".

So, Mr. Smarty Pants, as you see we Democrats have a solution that we are ready to implement. I guess this will end your derogatory snipes at us. We're not just a bunch of loonies and idle whiners.

Answer 2

That's likely because you don't read much about Democrats, based on your rhetoric. Their plan is to get out. Shut down the terrorist factory and training ground currently called the Iraq War. What is the Republican plan to convince the terrorists to be nice? I'll tell you: give more money to Halliburton so they can profit from the soldiers' deaths. Stage more photo-ops that waste the military's time and put them at risk. These plans are not very good, my Republican friend.

Answer 3

The republican plan will work - drop massive amounts of bombs on them, killing many of their family members and countrymen. That usually works to get people to like you.

I mean if Osama apologized for 9/11, we'd all get over it, especially if he said the innocents killed were unintended targets.

Answer 4

I think the key word you used is global. This is a global problem. It is also a law enforcement problem not military. So it must be a global solution. It isn't up to just the US to do this. My personal opinoin is your question is pretty lame.

Answer 5

Same as always. Abject subjugation ( not very practical see Romans) or middle class complacency (see China).

Answer 6

Yes there is a problem and it started the day Bush was elected into office.

But it can't be fixed at this point, it can only be delt with.

Answer 7

What none of you seem able to absorb is that there was not a "global terrorism" problem before bush. Just smatterings of impotent outbursts here and there.

bush CREATED "global terrorism."
bush gave it legitimacy.
bush gives incentive for recruitment.

It is preposterous for you to ask for "solutions" from us while you STILL have not assimilated the real data about terrorism, where TODAY's version came from, and bush's relationship to that data.

You all should be very proud.

Answer 8

they will give them lots of free aid, and replenish their equipment.

Answer 9

invite them over for dinner

Answer 10

THEY WILL TAKE A PAGE OUT OF SLICK WILLY'S BOOK. THEY WILL THROW MONEY AT THE PROBLEM. TYPICAL OF THE LIBERAL HOARD.