Did I make a mistake?
I got married in may of 2005 to my high school love. Everything was fine. She told me she was talking to another guy but nothing happened. I believed her. Then she became pregnant and My son came which I love 2 death. I bought a house and had the perfect family which I wanted. Them I found out she cheated on me and broke my heart. I also found out before I got married that she did have sex with that guy and the courts asked for a paternity test but I denied it bec that is my boy I know it. But did I make a mistake marrying her? we are in divorce court now bec she wants to be with the guy
2007-05-02 08:31:37 · 25 answers · asked by dirbe22 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would not consider it a mistake because you have a wonderful son who love with all your heart. I would consider it a life lesson. Learn from it, become stronger, and this way you will be a better person when you are ready to marry again.
Best of luck
2007-05-02 08:37:53 · answer #1 · answered by Scott O 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You didn't make one mistake, you made many mistakes. Get the paternity test done as soon as possible. Even if you want to be the kids father. What if he isn't yours, but is this other guys? You want to pay for his kid, even though your soon to be ex would rather be with him than you? What if she gets custody and moves. Are you going to go through all the hassles? And, what about your next love? Are you going to be able to afford going out, wining and dining another girl, while your paying child support for this one? If you are the father, you are no worse off than you already are...but if your not the father, better to know it now, rather than going through half your life, only to find out later, when the child needs medical attention or something, and you are not a match.
2007-05-02 08:37:25 · answer #2 · answered by auditor4u2007 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
to err is human.i am sorry for the pain i know you feel but dont be even dumber, get that paternity test! if he is yours you will know and she cant play head games with you or the other guy! if he is not you need to know that too! if it turns out that way yes it will hurt but its not his fault you can still be a part of his life without suppoting your ex and her lover.if it is his child or anyone elses you should not be paying child support.my husband wishes he had asked for paternity test from his ex during the divorce proceedings but he didnt.now he is stuck paying child support till they are 18 or graduate high school first.we got a lawyer later and asked for dna testing their mom refused and so did the judge because we dont know who the father might be or where he is .it is better to know the truth than be forced to live a lie! good luck.forget her she has just used you, you can do better but dont let her use you anymore.
2007-05-02 08:50:55 · answer #3 · answered by dixie58 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you should get a paternity test to make sure. Otherwise you'll be paying child support for a child that may be his. That was your only mistake. Marriages don't always work out. At least you tried.
2007-05-02 08:37:10 · answer #4 · answered by denise804 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you knew for sure she was the one for you with no doubt, then u made the right choice, but if u had doubts and denied it, you made a mistake. you should have been sure there was nothing going on with her and that guy. im not saying u were the only one who made the mistake though. She should have told you that she wanted to be with that guy instead of taking the zig-zag road and hiding it. You should let her go because obviously, your not meant to be.
2007-05-02 08:37:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a hard situation, kudos to you for being strong and handling it as you are. I don't think you made a mistake marrying her because you were not aware of what she was doing. It was her own fault; she should've told you she wasn't ready to marry. Now it's just a matter of ending it and moving on with your life - I wish you well.
2007-05-02 08:36:56 · answer #6 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did not make a mistake she did by cheating you thought you guys were OK and now she did this to you! Find out if your the father and let her go your better off good luck!
2007-05-02 08:35:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Live and learn. It's an old expression, but it's very true. There are things you just need to experience in life. No, you didn't make a mistake. You have your beautiful boy. He's not a mistake.
2007-05-02 08:35:46 · answer #8 · answered by true blue 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, man, you followed your heart. Sometimes that leads us to places we don't want to be. But you did not make a mistake marrying her, for how could you have known? You hang on to that little boy. You are his father because you say you are, and from the sound of it he is lucky to have such a decent man for a father. Good luck to you.
2007-05-02 08:39:00 · answer #9 · answered by John Timothy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry to hear that.
That really sucks.
At this point it won't help dwelling on whether or not it was a mistake to marry her, that seems to be over now. Just try to get things said and done as quickly as possible and then go on with your life.
Good Luck to you!
2007-05-02 08:36:09 · answer #10 · answered by Mom Sparrow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋