if a man sulks to get his woman to "give in" to sex, is this abuse?

Answer 1

First of all no one should make you do what you dont want to do. It is a form of emothinal abuse.
Second be strong. Dont give in to a guy like that. They are never worth it.
Third never let a guy guilt you in to do something you dont want to do. Be a strong women that you are. Good luck.

Answer 2

Depends how the couple is playing it. Maybe the man feels like this is the only way to get some physical attention. Are you active together or is it always him initiating the sex? Does he always have to beg and sulk? Does it only happen about sex or are there other instances in your life together where he acts childish to get his way. Maybe it's just a habit but not meant to be manipulative.

I mean, think about women, how when something is wrong we usually don't come right out and say it, we sulk and sigh and make our man work to get it out of us.
No, we don't do that all the time, but the reason we do it is because we want to feel that the man is putting in some effort to find out our feelings--not just going through the motions.
Or when we want something done or bought for us, we throw hints right? Sometimes we get pouty if we don't get our way.
How is this different?
It's just another version.
People are only crying foul about someone pouting for sex because it's sex and people automatically feel defensive about it.
Seriously, it is childish, yes, and it is manipulative, yes, but in the end, it is not presenting the woman with no alternative--she CAN say no.
How is this different than a child pouting to get a candy or a toy?
It's not.
Sometimes it is just easier to say yes and give in, but you know that if you do, then the child will get the message that it's okay to do it, that it gets them the result they want. To stop a child from whining and begging and pouting you have to be firm EVERY time and don't give in. You may have to do the same with the man.

Now, reasonabley you have to think, it involves sex, and there are so many stereotypes about marital sex. So many women feel like it's their "duty" to give in, even if they don't really feel like it, or else their man will be disappointed or even mad, or that he's going to tell all his buddies about how b**chy his wife is.

Besides, perhaps she's playing along with it too, even if she doesn't realize it, like the thing with making him ask her over and over what's wrong before she tells him--even subconciously, she's making him work for it. This may especially be true if she's not getting what she needs out of the sex experience.

I'd say, turn the tables some, be the initiator and pursue him for sex, but make sure it's when he's tired and irritable and busy with something else, so atleast, you can have a few things on your side, like timing and be a little more in control of the situation.

Now if you're not just playing games, if this really bothers you, and you're not afraid of your man, then tell him to grow up, that it's a big turnoff. Explain the whole thing about the child pouting for candy and how HE wouldn't give in to the kid would he?

Also, do you end up getting taken care of during these sessions or is it just all about him? That makes a difference too you know. It shows if he's wanting sex as a way to be with you or if he's just wanting to get off and is too lazy to do it himself.

So, no I don't think it's necessarily abuse, but you should think about your role in this, if it's really something you're using to your advantage, and decide if you want it to stop. If so, then be a good parent and just say no.

Answer 3

Im not sure if I would call it abuse but it is definatly childish behavior. I hate when men do that and it doesnt work with me. The more they sulk the less ill give in and probably wont give in the next time either.

Answer 4

Showing your feelings is not abuse.

I thought communication was supposed to be wonderful. Or are you only allowed to communicate when you don't want sex?

Now if he _pretends_ to sulk trying to get her to cave, basically intentionally refusing to be cheerful, I guess that's manipulative, but really, its stupid, because most women respond so poorly to sulking in terms of sex. They find it repellant.

He'd be better off dumping her. Which would be apparently the noble and not=selfish/manipulative thing to do.

Answer 5

It's not abuse, but it's really pathetic for anyone to have to stoop to the level of sulking in order to get sex.

Answer 6

I wouldn't call it abuse, but childish behaviour, yes. And a total turn-off! Who wants to have sex with a crybaby? I want a man in my bed, not a spoiled three-year-old in a man's body. NOT something to make you feel receptive. I wouldn't ever feel like "giving in" to the sulks...just like giving him away!

Answer 7

My husband always sulks, so he must want it quite a bit. I just laugh at him, it's a natural reaction, you would think he'd know me by now.

Answer 8

Is it abuse when a woman nags to get her way? Or withholds sexual favors because of something he did. No. Immature yes.. on all accounts. Just ask... if you get a no, deal with it.

Answer 9

I've never thought of manipulation as abusive.

If I sulk to get my man to buy me that new Coach bag I can't afford to buy myself, is that abuse? Hell No! That's ingenuity!

Answer 10

No. Immaturity, but not abuse.

It is the equivalent of a woman using her sex to get what she wants. It's just not as fun if a man does it.