2007-05-02 06:00:35 · 15 answers · asked by Beka 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My initial instinct is to say no it's way too young. However, free will means that you have the right to make your own choices and reap the successes and learn from the mistakes.
You will change so much between 17 and 20 and between 20 and 25 and the change between 25 and 30 is enormous!! Now if you choose to go into a long term partnership at such a young age, do so expecting to grow together! The other possibility is that you will grow apart :-(
Change is the only constant and as long as you share the same principles and expectations you have a great chance of growing together. However, our expectations can and do change as we mature.
At 18 I wanted a relationship where I felt so loved and wanted I never had to even think about let alone fear my man would look at another woman. At 20 I was in such a relationship and felt smothered by the love and attention. I didn't realize till 8 months after I called off the relationship that what I needed was more room! Didn't know it at the time, so didn't know to ask for it. Instead I thought I was going crazy as I had what I wanted but wasn't happy.:-((
Life provides contrast to keep on refining what we really want! Best of luck in whatever you decide to do.
2007-05-02 06:38:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes and No. Sure it is "ok" and technically you could get married, I think you would need parental consent under 18.
But let me just give you my experience. I was 18 dating a 17 yr old, we were dating for 2.5 years. He was my first love, my first everything. We thought we would be together forever. Everything seemed so perfect, and I could never imagine my life without him.
THEN I went off to college (which I suggest you both do, seperate or together) I went seperatly-as my bf was still a senior in HS. We stayed together that first year, but I grew up a lot. He got involved with the wrong crowd, started using drugs, got very possesive and jealous. We had a long conversation one night and ended things. It was HARD I thought about him for a long long time wondering if I had done the right thing.
My senior year of college at 20yrs, I met my now fiance. The absolute love of my life, my love at 18 was a form of 'puppy love' this love I feel now, is everlasting, unconditional, can picture sharing the rest of my life with nobody else love. My life would be incredibly different if I had rushed into marriage at that age.
My advice to you is: if you love each other enough to get married now, then get engaged. BUT have a long engagment, do not get married until you are 22 or 23.
Even though it doesnt seem like it now, you have a lot of growing and learning to do. But if your love is meant to be, then you will still be able to be married in a few years. There is no reason at all to rush.
Good luck to you both
2007-05-02 14:03:33 · answer #2 · answered by Katie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's okay. But you'll probably wish you could change it in a year or two. I got married when I was 17 but the main reason we got married was because I got pregnant. But that didn't matter then we loved each other for the time being. I had plans after I graduated, I was going to live with my sister and be totally crazy and be with the man Ive loved since I was 15 and now I think my husband is cheating on me. Actually I'm pretty sure of it. I don't regret my son but I regret the man he was conceived by.
I think you should think about all your differences and even try living together (without parents) to see how things go. If I could do the marriage part over again I defiantly would. Good luck!!
2007-05-02 14:03:57 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Possibly ...... providing you are a girl and the man is older and you love each other. If you both were asked to write out what love means would you both have the same answers? If so you will probably make it but are you both the same age? I married my wife when she had just turned 19 and this has lasted for 25 years so far. But I am quite a bit older than her. If the man in the relationship is 17 or 18 I doubt it will last very long because 17 or 18 year old guys have not got the maturity to deal with the problems of provision and sacrifice needed to care for his bride. Trust me.
2007-05-02 13:20:21 · answer #4 · answered by pwwatson8888 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's easy to get married but be sure that your in it for the long haul and not just looking for a place to go.
At such a young age a person is not mature enough to handle a committed relationship ( it's probably why there are so many swingers around). It takes a lot of practice (relationships) and finding the right person to truly understand what marriage is all about .
A person changes a lot from 18 -25yrs of age. If they are married and cannot keep up with the changes of themselves and their spouse, the marriage will not make it. Marrying early is a recipe for disaster but it can work. It all depends on how hard your willing to fight for the marriage and if your both up for the challenge.
2007-05-02 14:34:15 · answer #5 · answered by trojan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you will be two completely different people by the time you are 25-30. There are some natural life changes that occur at 21 (after college) and at 25 (after a few years working a real career). If you are meant to be together, why rush into it now? Wait until you are 25 and if you are still together then get married. You shouldn't get married until you have developed as individuals (outside your parents' home), and are financially stable to live on your own.
2007-05-02 13:58:28 · answer #6 · answered by Christina T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's OK. You are of age at 18. Personally if I was 17 I would wait until I don't have to have mom and dad sign papers because it would be my decision alone.
At 17 you think that this is something that you want, but by the time your 18 you could change your mind because you would be a little more mature.
2007-05-02 13:11:56 · answer #7 · answered by Been There Done That 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know many people who got married this age, and they are doing just fine. The secret is being truly commited to one another, and be ready to work on the relationships problems, because they will certainly come.
I personaly think you should be a bit older, as you need to be really mature to deal with the circunstances. But yes, can be done. However, if you're not 100% sure that's what you want, WAIT!!! - if you go ahead and get married, whenever the problems kick in, you automaticaly is going to blame the other person and resent him / her for your frustration.
The passion is just a phase. Only love last forever, and true love comes with time.
2007-05-02 13:32:21 · answer #8 · answered by liellys 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its ok to get married but are you sure that is what you want. It is a little young, but I got married at 18, so did most of the women in my family and all of my friends, granted most of us are now divorced(myself widowed at 23) but if you think you are ready then go for it. If not, slow down and try to enjoy some of your life first.
2007-05-02 14:19:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Legally, maybe...depending on your local laws. But...honestly, at that age, you are not prepared to understand the meaning of such a commitment. Even at 20-21, you really have not had the chance to experience all the things that life has to offer. If the two of you are truly 'in love' then it won't matter if you wait, eventually you'll take the 'plunge.' It has nothing to do with 'knowing' that you are in love, it has everything to do with 'knowing' what life is all about.
2007-05-02 13:22:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋