stay at home Mothers should have to do every thing it takes to run their home? Or should the family help? Is it wrong for me to ask them for help! We have many pets to take care of too! 3 cats , 5 kittens, 1 lab puppy and 1 rabbit! 4 kids age almost 18 , 15 , 8 and 7! I have to do all the house chores! Pay all the bills! I take care of every aspect! No one helps me! Is is wrong for me to ask for help?
2007-05-02 04:09:33 · 63 answers · asked by Amy E 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Now my husband wants me to get a public job too! I have so much work to do at the church! I help with the kids schools! I dont know what will happen if I get a public job! What should I do! ?
2007-05-02 04:19:09 · update #1
I have been at stay at home mom for 18 years now!
2007-05-02 04:20:40 · update #2
Please pray for me! I am just wore out!
2007-05-02 04:32:41 · update #3
I pray for peace and unity in your home.
2007-05-02 05:26:23 · answer #1 · answered by robert p 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If they don't help around the house, how are they going to know how to take care of household things when they are out on their own? I never had to do chores when I was a kid and I had to learn everything the hard way. My kids (15 an 13) could most definitely take care of themselves -- and do it well if (heaven forbid) something should happen to me.
From the time they are 3 they are old enough to make their own beds, put their clothes in the hamper, feed the animals, put the silverware away from the dishwasher and make themselves a sandwich. By age 18 they should know everything it takes to run a household, such as cooking complete meals, paying bills, minor car maintainance, lawn care, making and keeping their own appointments, etc.
We have a chore chart in the house. Each day my kids have 3-5 things they are responsible for. It might be loading or unloading the dishwasher, taking the garbage out, sorting thier laundry, feeding the dogs, whatever. I can't pretend that they don't complain, but they know they are responsible for it. On Saturdays, I write down every thing that needs to be done and divide the list in fours. Each of us does our assigned chores. At times I have let them pick which chores they wanted, but lately we have used a chore wheel.
If the kids don't help with the animals, I would definitely consider getting rid of them (the animals, not the kids. lol)
2007-05-02 04:24:32 · answer #2 · answered by comet girl...DUCK! 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Definitely Not !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have to initially explain the matter to your husband, if you have not yet done so ! Since your husband is a Preacher, who is supposed to be preaching to all to be HUMBLE , SIMPLE ! GENEROUS! HELPING ! ETC. ETC. it is his first and foremost duty to get his children practice these virtues at home before thrusting them on others !!!! Otherwise he has no right to be a PREACHER at any cost. If he do not do this tell him that you will report these matters in the prayer meeting indirectly with a Prayer Request for getting prayers from the faithfuls in his PRAYER HALL or CHURCH or whatever may be so that God gives some solution ! I think that this will work and would be a very effective solution! Preaching alone is not enough to complete his devoted work as Preacher. He has too act as well wherever the occasion arises and that in his case is in your house.
So chop out a schedule according to the age and capacity and the spare time available of each child and also of your husband and put forward the same in front of your husband first and both of you decide and compell them to get them performed. After all you are a middle - aged Lady and besides when you see that all the rest in the family just eat, drink and make merry and go out, any human soul will feel depressed and degraded as well as totally lost as a down-trodden animal (donkey). This fact should be smoothly injected to your dear husband and I am sure that he will too will realize the urgency of an immediate solution for your present precarious enviornmental conditions.
With all the good wishes for your betterment.
2007-05-02 04:23:26 · answer #3 · answered by cabridog 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The children should have chores to do to help around the house. The boys should take out garbage, mow the lawn, rake the leaves, water the flowers, feed the pets, etc. The girls should help clean the house, do dishes, do the laundry & ironing, etc. If your husband is a preacher AND works at a public job, I would say that his plate is already full, but there is definitely room for the kids to take on some responsibility.
2007-05-02 04:16:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Most people don't realize that being a stay at home mom is hard! I'm 25 and I go to school full time, work 2 jobs, and I have a 6 year old, a fiance, and take care of a disabled mom. Everyone should contirubte the household in some way. Maybe it's time to teach your children responsibility with how to help mom when they are at home. Assign them chores to do and make sure that you stick to them.
2007-05-02 04:13:53 · answer #5 · answered by evil_soul0999 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's wrong for you to ask for help, as long as those you are asking have enough free time of their own to help you out. I raised five children, and there was a time when I stayed at home. I'll tell you, I was glad to get back to work full time, as there wasn't a minute in the day that I wasn't doing something!
I think one way to cut down on your work load is to evaluate what things that you are doing daily are really important. Give the kids some of the responsibilities in caring for the pets. Delegating is a wonderful thing and it may preserve your sanity! Have you given any thought to paying some of your bills on-line so you can eliminate those trips?
Good luck to you and try to have a restful week! Annie
2007-05-02 04:18:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
NO it is not wrong! I would start with the 18 and 15 yr.old! the 7 & 8 yr.olds can pick up their toys, learn to put dirty clothes and such in the proper areas.. the 18 & 15 yr.olds can clean house can't they?! They can also help take care of the animals. I would have a house meeting. You are only one person living in a home of 6...... YOU NEED SOME HELP! It sounds like you could also use some alone time.. A day all to yourself! I don't believe God made wives to be slaves... he made them to be a partner. Where is the partnership in this?
2007-05-02 04:17:50 · answer #7 · answered by Godlover 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
No, definitely ask for help. Your kids are old enough to help you. In order to get my allowance when I was younger, I had to do certain chores. No chores, no problem...just didn't get any money that week! Made me learn fast...
Stay-at-home moms are walked over, but you need to put your foot down. All of the kids should at least have one chore to do, and perhaps the older ones having more--like making dinner, once in a while to give you a break! Assign one kid one animal to take care of...or something. Be creative, have a family meeting and lay down the new rules...and make sure you tell your husband to support you. Good luck!! :-)
2007-05-02 04:14:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
You definitely need some help around the house. Your 18 and 15 yr old are more than capable of helping out. Even at 8 and 7, they are old enough to do small chores. My kids are 18 and 15 and they both help their mother out.
2007-05-02 05:41:31 · answer #9 · answered by BigJake418 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A job outside the home might be a pleasant experience for you. If in fact, this is the decision you make, I would call a family meeting together, with husband in charge. Have lists made out and in hand to pass out to every family member as to the "new" home duties for each. Your children need to know how to do these things...right?
If you don't choose to work outside the home, assign chores anyway. They can be rewarded for chores that are done, and privileges taken away for chores left undone. Just make sure, that you don't give in and do them. Demanding help...is for yourself and good training for your children.
It's a win, win situation, after the kids realize that this is the way it's going to be.
2007-05-02 04:38:14 · answer #10 · answered by kayboff 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm thinking the family should work as a unit . . therefore, everything should be done by everyone. I do think the kids shoujld have some specific chores and be rewarded for their efforts. I think the husband should die to to the wife as Jesus did for the church, so he should always help and cater to the wife with everyhting he is. I think the wife should follow the husbands lead and consider him head of household, not because she is inferior, but because she loves him.
I think it takes 2 to run a household. The motives behind you getting a job need to be within God's will. I say some deep prayer (and maybe fasting) should occur prior to you getting a job.
Agape Sister ♥
2007-05-02 04:36:09 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋