How can I calm myself down?

Question

I just can't seem to take things easy... I started taking up art because I like the idea of creating my own figures and am excited at the thought of making them beautiful like all those other artists draw them.

But every time I pick up a pencil and hunch over a sheet of drawing paper I start to get nervous... Every time I draw, I'm always erasing my lines. I spend several minutes drawing the same line over and over and over again.

My artist friends keep telling me that I'm being too hard on myself, that I shouldn't expect things to look perfect at my level, that I can't expect to improve overnight, yada yada. Nothing they tell me helps, their advice just doesn't sink into my subconscious and I continue to fret and fuss over my drawings to the point where I yell at myself and break pencils.

How can I train my mind to just accept making mistakes? I've always been trained to make things perfect so that obviously doesn't help me. What can I do to calm myself down?

I've already tried listening to music, drinking chamomile tea, watching funny cartoons and playing video games in an attempt to wash away my stresses, but I still turn red soon after I start drawing. Do I have serious issues or something?

Soadzombi: But that's just the thing, it's more frustrating rather than fun. I'd really like to someday be able to be in the same crowd as my artist friends, but seeing how I can't get myself out of a negative attitude toward learning something new, I feel it'll never happen...

Answer 1

This is what I learned in art school, from a teacher that first year students never took seriously. Ironically, he was perhaps one of the best teachers I ever had.

So here we all are, freshman in Drawing 1 class, each of us thinking this is going to be an easy A because all of us can draw (except for the Architectual and fiber art students) and in comes Mr. Morris, probably the first man I had ever met that made my heretofore untapped gay-dar go off. WHich is irrelevant but I am trying to paint a picture here...

And so he sets up our nude model, and tells us to start, and proceeds to go around the room telling all of us that we aren't doing it right. I can safely say that all of us were hunched over our tablets furiously trying to capture the model as lifelike as possible, painstakingly rendering every minute detail.

Needless to say, after a few weeks of him telling us "no" basically, we were all frustratred to the point that we began just scribbling lines that sort of mimicked the model and that is when Mr. Morris, a fashion designer and window dresser for Macy's and Saks and all of the big names in New York, back in the day when style meant something, jumping up and down (which he did often when we did something right) shouted "Yes! That's perfect!" He was also famous for saying things like "If they (the Art Directors) wanted it to look like a photograph they would hire a photographer," and "If you don't have references, you can't bullshit properly."

What I am trying to say with this anecdote is - you shouldn't be hunched over the paper. Go outside with a big newspaper print pad and a bunch of charcoal and go to town. Make mistakes - don't erase. Mr. Morris loved lines that had been gone over several times. Go to the mall (a favorite place Mr. Morris liked to take his classes) and sketch the people and whatever else is in your view. It doesn't have to be perfect, but you are making your creative self constipated by trying too hard. Art should be expressive, unless you are trying to become a medical or industrial illustrator.

Also, pick up the book "Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain" and follow the steps in it. It helps to give you a little boost of self confidence and a little understanding of how to see things.

Another thing you might want to try later on: there may be life drawing classes at your local college or community arts association offers to the public. You might want to consider taking one.

IMHO, it can't be very constructive for you to be isolated in a room somewhere tyring to make a go at it all by yourself. And definitely don't compare yourself to anyone else. Remember why you are doing what you're doing in the first place.

Answer 2

I've suffered from depression and anxiety for over a year now, and I've experienced the uncontrollable sobbing with hyperventilation.... It's called a panic attack. This may not be an all natural approach, but I found that the best way of calming down was Valium that the doctor prescribed to me. Yes, it can make you sleepy, but if you take a very small dose (such as 2mg, or maybe 5mg depending on how upset you are) then you will find that your body will start to relax without the drowsy effect. Valium is only a temporary solution to the initial panic attacks, though. I would definitely reccommend seeing a counsellor or a psychologist, because they will be able to console you and help you to work through your grief. See your GP asap to get a prescription and a referral..... And don't worry, you WILL get through this.

Answer 3

I think you need a bit of energy therapy :)

Emotional Freedom Techniques is great at helping people calm down, understand where their need for perfection comes from, why we are so hard on ourselves etc.

It is a drug free therapy that is a bit like acupuncture without the needles and the best thing is that you can easily teach yourself how to apply it so whenever you get stressed out or worked up you can sort yourself out on the spot without waiting for an appointment for a therapist.

So each time you are hunched over that sheet of paper you can easily get rid of whatever thoughts come up.

You can find out more from these sites below.

Answer 4

You're too concerned about getting it right the first time. Are you a perfectionist? There is no such thing in the art world. Work with the concept in mind that there is no mistake in art.

Intentionally make a drawing full of 'mistakes' (that's your homework young man!)and you'll see what i mean. And put away that eraser- that's only for drafting

Answer 5

In addition to cognitive therapy (traditional counseling,) try taking a cleansing breath. Here's how to do it:
Take a deep breath.
Hold it for 2 to 3 seconds.
Let it out slowly through pursed lips.
Repeat it 3 times.

Answer 6

Just breath, that's the secret to everything.
You should also know that as long as you get some fun drawing, you have acheived the goal of it.