Why ae people so shallow?

Question

I have never been a particular handsome guy. I am 30 years old and I still occassionally get acne. I have a somewhat peculiar looking face, and I am slightly overweight. I am married to a wonderful beautiful woman though. I was made fun of in school, but this kind of stopped when I got to college. Recently, I have discovered that many people were talking about me behind my back, about the way I look and the way I talk (I have a speech impediment too, and went to speech therapy for years, which helped as much as it could). I know I could lose the weight through working out and I don't want to get plastic surgery for any of my features. I am wondering why people are so mean and shallow. It really has hurt my feelings to know that so many people, even people I trusted, hold looks in such high accords. I cannot change any more of me the way I am, and I have always suffered from depression because of it. What should I do?

Answer 1

Hi. I have discovered in my years of life that people talk about other people because they can't deal with their own insecurities and it make them feel better to pick on someone elses. Basically, they pick at what they view as your obvious flaws hoping to keep their secret ones hidden. If you are satisfied with your looks and life and your spouse is satisfied, then to hell with what other folks think. Don't let these small minded people control your life and by worrying about what they say and allowing it to affect your life then you are giving them power. All you need to know is that you have a good wife and are happy the way things are and if anyone has a problem with it tell them to kiss your happy overweight ***.

Answer 2

People are shallow. You have to brake every thing down. The science of this will every thing you are comes down to really just having kids, that's why you wake up go to work, even if you don't have a kid or never plan to have a kid. Your work makes the world run, every one together working is making a better world for the kids to to take over. You don't look at a woman and think wow I bet she could make 9 or 10 kids but you should because that's what good looks come down to. Any kind of weakness like the way you to the way you take to the person you are(depression).
I would say that you should stop thinking about what people want you to be. Do stuff that makes you happy, be happy. Go do some thing to raise you self image. And what I like to tell every one stop eating fast food.
lots of love and good luck

Answer 3

If you are happy with yourself, then that is all that really matters. I know it sounds cliche, but it is true. People talk about other people to make themselves feel better. Everyone is self-conscious, self-aware, and self-serving. This is not necessarily a bad thing all of the time, but sometimes we hurt others to achieve our own self-satisfaction. It sounds like you have a loving wife, and a level head. You've got a lot more going for you than many people. Don't let other's insecurities get you down!!

Answer 4

it is people like that whom end up shallow in the end. looks do not last forever and no matter what they all wake up in the morning and put their pants on the same way you do. one leg at a time so no matter how good looking, how smart or how much money anyone has its your personality and heart that will make you feel good about yourself. in the end we all are the same people.....it just takes some people longer to figure it out.

Answer 5

speak slowly and you might get over your impediment

people are shallow because looks are what people first see. well-rounded people should know that everything isnt as it seems. and every does want their things to be bright and shiny and fit. i guess shallowness is almost like greediness in a way because you want things all in your own way and not accepting it any other way because its not ideal. but someone is ideal to someone else. and we all think differently. at least you found someone of your own that understands/doesnt care what is wrong with you, but cares for what is right!

Answer 6

How about jogging? You know, you lose the weight, the depression and find that runners are better looking, smarter and happier. I tried it when I was younger, and it does work. Yes, I know its shallow, everyone is-wish I had a good answer for that.

Answer 7

First of all, i want to say im sorry u have to go through that. I understand how much it hurts when u find out people are talking about u behind ur back. its very hurtfull. but as much as it sucks, not many people care about other peoples feelings. i myself dont judge people by looks or how they speak. i live by the quote "treat others the way you would want to be treated" and as for your depression, its understandable that u would be depressed about it, but like u said, u have wonderful wife, who im sure loves u dearly. so when im depressed about what people say about me, i just shrug them off and focus on the people in my life who love me. dont waste ur time on the shallow, self-centered jerks, trust me, their not worth it! :] as long as ur comfterable with ur looks [which u have no reason not to be] then ur fine. be happy with urself and be proud!

Answer 8

People are not shallow. Appearances are the first things we go by when meeting someone, of course. That's how it is unless people are blind. Just take care of yourself and wear nice clothes, and you'll be fine

Answer 9

just be confident and be yourself! honestly, i think everyone is shallow in a way, it's just some people express it and others don't. society also effects this, i mean where i live, the ideal beauty is "california style"...you know? the beachy casual look? so just love yourself and respect yourself, don't conform to anything!

Answer 10

just seriously-get over it...gosh life is way to short to be cool u know? so just lovers yourself! be happy with the way God made u,o well that they talked about u,it does hurt..but u have a beautiful wife ,and she should encourage you ,but babe dont take it personal..just move along -and remember .life is to short to be cool