2007-05-01 11:22:21 · 14 answers · asked by Miss T 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
You guys are CRACKING me up!! This is great. I forgot to put my moment.. *LOL* It was actually me and my best friend.. very intoxicated at the bar.. and we decided to ask some guy to lay down on the ground and draw his outline with pool chalk.. after we did someone else came over and drew a drink in the outlines hand.. the bouncer then came over about 20 min. later and asked who did the outline and we all just looked at him blankly then the drunker people kept walking by and looking down very very confused..
2007-05-01 12:16:39 · update #1
Wasn't in a bar, but after the bar closed.
I was in a coffee shop around 2:30 a.m. after the bars closed. One of the local lushes was trying to make a phone call. I think he was trying to get someone to come get him because he was too drunk to drive.
Anyway, the phone rang and we could hear Jim say:
Hello! Hello!!!
Who are you?
After he got his answer, he said:
"Pardon me lady, but you done answered the wrong damned phone." and hung up.
Everyone in the coffee shop nearly fell over laughting.
2007-05-01 11:33:49 · answer #1 · answered by Doc Hudson 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was tending the bar one night and it was really dead. There was only one customer in the joint,and he was a cop. He just sat there brooding drinking his beer,and the quiet was getting on my nerves. As I was heading to turn up the music another customer walked in. Damn,another cop! So he asks for a beer and takes it to the other end of the bar.,to brood. The other cop signaled me for another oneso I take it to him and mention the other cop. Asked him if they knew each other. He said no. The quiet in the place was killing me,so I said;"Tell ya what,I'll bring you a pitcher of beer if you go sit by that guy and you two can get to know each other and talk" I mean, hell, they were cops,they had to have something in common right? So these cops are sitting together now right,and as I'm walking up with the beer I hear the first cop say.... I've got an I.Q. of 8 how high is yours? Other cop says 8. That's the funniest thing I've ever seen or heard in a bar.
2007-05-01 18:35:17 · answer #2 · answered by donelle g. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long story..A local bar has a one way glass by the entrance, you can see the entry, but coming in you just see a mirror. A guy we know came in, put a ski mask on in front of the mirror as we watched him, wondering what's he doing? He barged in and said it was a hold up, everyone laughed and threw drinks at him calling his name, he ran out and got free meals for a few years courtesy of the state...
2007-05-02 02:48:38 · answer #3 · answered by metoo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My whole table (ladies from our fastball team) was laughing when this fat aboriginal old lady in a long skirt was chasing this old man around the bar, she caught the old slim white old man and he was laying on the floor (he had a big smile like he was enjoying the attention).
Another time, this guy was bragging that he could drink this shooter that you lit up with a match (I believe the shooter is called flaming rear end or something like that). Anyway he was bragging when we saw him take the shooter and he panicked and his mustache caught on fire. The macho guy ended up being laughed at by the whole table.
2007-05-01 18:30:25 · answer #4 · answered by Emily L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was funny for us that a guy who comes into our bar always double checks his change and tries to make the bar staff look stupid.He always says"You can't be too careful"
One night on checking his £10 note it was found to be a forgery so the barman serving him had great pleasure in saying to him"Sorry Sir this is a forged note and it's illegal to give it back,you should always check them you can't be too careful"
It turned out it had been given to him in the Post Office of all places,and he had two more in his wallet!
2007-05-01 18:33:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Me and my brother were gettin' smashed and there was a mural painted on the wall,I told him to look at the deer in the picture,he shoved his stool back and yup he went a&& over teakettle there he was laying on the floor with his stool beside him and his beer all over himself and a few others that were sittin' at the table behind him.
2007-05-01 18:30:57 · answer #6 · answered by Tazz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I saw an intoxicated guy stagger over to another intoxicated guy in a full length mink coat and wish him a Happy Mother's Day---hee, hee, hee.
2007-05-01 18:25:40 · answer #7 · answered by Miss T 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A big tough-looking guy was wasted and accidentally threw up in a little wimpy guy's pitcher of beer. The wimpy guy didn't do a THING.
2007-05-01 18:28:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably the guys vertical smiles as they sit on the barstools! Lol!
2007-05-01 18:25:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
While vomiting I hit my head on the toilet so hard I was knocked out.
2007-05-01 18:28:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋