Would you file for divorce if your spouse cheated on you?

Question

I know if I was married I would in a heartbeat! I think people these days are stupid for not getting a divorce when the time is right. Anyone who cheats on their spouse is not worthy or marriage as far as I'm concerned. People don't seem to stay together very long these days and I guess thats sad. Although I don't have a wife that does not mean I can't be happy. I cannot understand how people think that marriage is the beginning of happiness. Some of the most miserable people these days are married people. And sluts and man whores seem to like to attempt to play the game of stealing someone's spouse for a good time. Many marriages are corrupt or even perverse. It kinda makes you wonder if there is anyone out there for you at all. When your friend is asking you to have sex with his wife I think that can very well be classified as "Sick" or "perverse". People are too open to sex and mind games these days. I think a person is better off single.

People who mistreat their spouse or their children are just as bad as the worst serial killers. They deserve to be miserable. And in most cases after they have burned all their bridges; THEY ARE! And no need for a prison because they are in their own prison.

People like this deserve: "NO MERCY!" and no compassion or sympathy whatsoever.

Its not a phobia! Its called "COMMON SENSE!". It used to be about love. Now its about sex and competition. Many single women love the challenge of trying to take a woman's husband away from her. Or more less; destroy their marriage. And vice versa.

Well abby your right!!! I have a zero tolerance policy. In my world cheaters always lose! When people choose to hurt others its always best to give the cold shoulder and let it snow in hell before you ever speak to them again.

Answer 1

Well, my ex husband cheated on me and I filed for divorce. To me, no reason is good enough to cheat on your spouse and excuses like "I was drunk so I cheated" are the lamest excuse I've heard yet. You ALWAYS have a choice to cheat or not to and if you choose to cheat, you should be willing to face the consequences as well. I don't believe in giving them a second chance, but that's just me. Trust is broken and even if I tried hard to regain it, it will never be like what it was before, so it's better to just leave.

Answer 2

I don't think that all married people are miserable, well at least I know I'm not and my husband and I don't have an open relationship as far as having sex with other people go I think that when people get married you should stay faithful to your spouse and even if they say I don't care if you have sex with someone else you shouldn't. I think that people just look at things a lot different then 15 or even 10 years ago. Marriage is supposed to take place between two people that love each other and that are willing to work problems out when the come and not just ditch out on the first sign of trouble, if you have a lot of problems within your relationship that should tell you right there not to marry the person cause it will only make it worst. I also don't think that people have to be married to be happy if you don't think marriage is for you then that is fine to. I know in my marriage things aren't also perfect but that's life but me and my husband work out the things we need to and move on, plus we stay faithful to each other and if he every cheated on me he would be out the door. And your right there are tooooo many people that are way to open with sex and mind games.

Answer 3

Well, aren't we on a high horse today? You can't say what you will or won't do unless you are married, friend. Have you ever heard the saying about walking a mile in someone elses shoes? I am married, have been for 15 years and have two beautiful children. I was once very stubborn about the cheating/divorce thing and felt like if my hubby did cheat - there would be no doubting what I would do - leave him. I felt so sorry for women who did stay with their husbands who cheated for not being stronger and they were so stupid. BUT - when an affair did hit my marriage - It made me see a completely different side to it. First, an affair isn't the problem, it is a symptom. If someone was completely happy - they wouldn't stray. If you can take an honest look at your relationship and see why an affair happened and how you can repair your marriage - then divorce isn't the answer. You add children to the picture and pretty soon you are trying to make the best decision for ALL people involved. Your children's happiness or misery falls directly into your hands. At one point, I wasn't sure we would survive the affair. My husband was very "confused" about what he "wanted" with his life - meaning did he want to lose his family and be with this homewrecking whore or fly straight and work it out with me. I tried and tried to do everything I could to make it work. I loved my husband, but I knew I could make it on my own. I chose to not go down that path. I went to counseling, dealt with my share of pain, started the slow road to recovery and came to a point where I told myself that if this marriage was going to fail - it wasn't b/c of the choices I made. I wanted to be able to look in the mirror and into the faces of my children and know that I did everything i could do to save our family. Maybe someday you too will be lucky enough to be married and have a family and I hope for your sake you won't go thru the same process as I did with saying what you would never put up with becoming a reality.

Answer 4

I didn't file the first time my husband cheated was married 11 yrs and 2 children I knew my sister n law was after my husband and I didn't know what to do to stop it. We'll it came out and I knew she was more guilty then him but still was wrong and we did forgive but he did end up cheating again and I did file for divorce. I feel you can be happy in a marriage but both people need to work at it and its not easy more people need to learn to give rather then think of themselves and some need to know married couples are off limits to even try to break them up also if love is true in the heart then the spouse should have never cheated in the first place I was married 19 yrs he was my first and I never once cheated on him to get back it was just plain wrong I did love him very much just couldn't trust him or believe him no more.

Answer 5

I agree as once a cheater always a cheater and with today's society if you have kids you would understand a bit better but, the problem is this, remember when the moms use to stay home and raise the kids well, with todays society both parents are forced to work no one to keep an eye on their kids so they run wild or the parents will buy them anything they want just to shut them up. No more Morales or values taught to them as parents do not have the time (sad) isn't it. My kids are in high school and what is really sad is it use to be the boys that were the pigs, sorry but the girls are now the pigs and in 9th grade when std's and pregnancies are happening makes you really wonder what is wrong with the parents, do you know high school girls can have babies kill them and get away with it because (they didn't know what to do) explain that one. I know all to well what you are saying at least I can be happy about this, I raised my kids with the same values & morales I grew up with. :0) ps yes I would file

Answer 6

i've been with a serial cheater (sex addict) for 14 years and let me tell you that it is a rough road to go through. I love my husband and a part of him loves me. This last time has killed something deep inside of me though and there are good days when we are talking alot and getting through this and playing together and being a family. And then there are those days where it weighs heavily on me wondering if he is cheating again with some chick down at school or work, if he is really serious even if he is in therapy, or if he is just biding his time waiting to do it again or going to find the one that he thinks sparks his delight and leaves me. It has been tough on our kids too. He is just now understanding that although his kids love him, they are VERY angry at him for all the **** he has pulled while i bend over backwards to make him happy. And god help the last chick or any other he tries to get with cause my boys already want to rip the last one to shreds. For all those whores, men and women that cheat or get involved with cheaters you need to stop and think about more than yourself! you ruin lives! you really screw up your spouse and your children all because waaaaaaa your not happy. Then fix it and either move on or be happy with your spouse and stop this sneaking around crap and hurting people.

Answer 7

Well, yes, and I would have a lot more than that on my to do list!

I am happily married with a healthy family life. I am no dummy either, neither is my hubby. Known eachother 2 year, knew I was gonna marry for 1 yr, we talked about getting married for over 1 year, then he asked. Been married 7 years, one 5 yr old girl and one who passed at 3 months.

Too many people have a lack of moral sense to begin with. He and I are the same, cheat on me and see how long you will live! Too many people don't treat marriage for what it is, and then people don't communicate.

We are all sinners but we still make choices, choose to live a married family life or stay single, but can't do both! And sex freedom etc, lots of problems with that. A healthy sex life is one of the pillars in a foundation of a lasting marriage (along with communication and trust/honesty and God)

We both work at it, and we both stick with it, but it works for us.

And yes, some people are very warped and create sad sorry situations for themselves getting involved with an unhealthy relationship.

Answer 8

There is nothing more damaging to a relationship than a cheating spouse but a lot of the time the person being cheated on takes it personally. I mean they take that act and turn in on themselves as if it was something you did wrong that caused it and it IS NOT. A cheating spouse is a person that is dealing with their own insecurities and the reasons can be dozens of different things. If your spouse is worth working through this hurt then i would definitely suggest lots of therapy and lots of communicating. I'm sorry for your hurt and wish you much happiness.

Answer 9

You don't have to be married to be happy. My husband & I are soon over 4 good . He doesn't know it yet but his paperwork will be served shortly. The marriage has been over 4 a long time . He desserted me in all ways . Yes he cheated on me & now that was the last straw. Thought he was finding himself but found out he was wanting others. I;m Ok withit now b/c I finially realized the whole concept of marriage was not there. Wanting to share your life w/ w someone you loved .. He thinks he loves but all he can do is lie & not share his life . He'll never be happy . Serves him right . His problems run to deep but he used his pride to escape that instead of letting me help him through love and sharing . He'll never be able to give of himself 100% .. but he'll always be the staring role pretending too. I have to move on now b/c I was w/ someone after all those years, who never found true love. It is true ya know ... LOVE IS BLIND. And now I see the whole world is bright again. I'll be single now but will still be looking for the love I shall have one day. I hear his woman is young . Im glad for him that he realized his youth will be in her . Her ... she can have him . Maybe she will be able to fix what I could not . Something tells me she will turn out to be a bitter person... one day and that is where I feel sorry for her but ....LIVE n LEARN. I do believe it is sick someone would want that {to sleep w/ thier spouse} or in that way it could be a way to get rid of her so that you didn't want to be a man about the issues. THAT is something that my husband would do . And it goes back to the deep set problems he has and the pure wickedness he is all about. . We all have problems but some of us choose not to see them and deal w/ them...

Answer 10

I've been married for over 19 years, if my husband cheated on me once, I'd probably try to save the marriage. Especially if it were a one night stand type deal. However, on the 2nd time, he'd be history, and I'd be filing for divorce. But I've got a lot of my life tied up with his, and I've got alot invested in this relationship with him, and our family.

However, if he had done it when we were first married, I'd have probably left him right then and there.

However, I seriously doubt he'd cheat on me, we've got a pretty good marriage. I don't think everyone who is married is miserable, I know I'm not.