Caught my wife(married 18 years) cheating. Found out for sure when I walked in on her doing two guys at once several months ago. She admitted she started doing pot and other drugs with one of the new "friends". I work long hours and she has not worked the past 2 years while being the one watching our disabled son. He is at school during the day so she is free to do what she wants -which is other people. She said she was sorry and would not cheat again - I forgave her- and caught her again and again with different guys. Then she admitted that she had started sleeping with women too.
She been an uptight prude who pretty much insisted on missionary only. Now she has become wild in bed pretty much up for anything, fullfilled every one of my sex fantasies including sharing another woman. Problems though... I think she devalues us entirely now. I still love her but feel she does not love me anymore. I want the drugs and the cheating to stop. I don't think she will
2007-04-30 02:31:05 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes I realize that I should not have taken advantage of the situation and her offer to bring another woman to bed. She has used that and the other things she did with me in bed as a tit for tat when I try to push her on the drugs and the cheating.
2007-04-30 02:33:31 · update #1
Wife's cheating should make you mad enough to want to get rid of her for good.
2007-04-30 02:39:30 · answer #1 · answered by Daiquiri Dream 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion she is not good at all, Im very sorry that you have a baby that need both parents but there is nothing you can do with your wife, she is the only one who choose the life that she want to live , there is no way that she can change, you must know that you can do everything for her, but that won't make her to see the way you see things, you do not derseve a person like this in your life cos its look like you will suffer through you whole life, you just need to take your time and think about this considering all the facts. Wish you good luck and hope your decision that you will take will be the best one.
2007-04-30 02:49:54 · answer #2 · answered by NUNU 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds to me like there are a few things that need to be addressed here. First your wife sounds like a sex addict and no that is not like what everyone thinks as a good thing. She is using drugs and sex to cover up pain or frustration, lonlieness, being overwhelmed, and anger instead of working things out with you. She needs to go to therapy and seek help for her drug and sex addiction. You need your own therapy to be able to understand what is going on and work through your anger. I know that living with an addict and being a codependent sometimes we enable their behavior because we just want to make that person happy. It only makes it worse because then the behavior becomes more and more worse and we feel like crap because it doesn't feel like they truly love us for what we're trying to do for them. I hope this helps and know that the pain and anger and all those raw emotions are going to have to be worked through and it will take a long time to do this.
2007-04-30 02:49:43 · answer #3 · answered by wilfeistykitten2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man, this is unhealthy to the max!! is she willing to seek marriage counseling and drug rehab to try and save y'all's relationshIp?
she is not only cheating on you with people but also with drugs...believe me, i have been in that type of relationsihp before and until she wakes up to her own self abusive behavior it will get worse...if she's not willing to stop the drugs then the rest of it is moot-it ain't gonna stop either. right now, she is totally in love with the "high" of drugs...
yeah, you were wrong to take advantage of fulfilling a sexual fantasy by monopolizing on the situation...but its not a lifestyle that you want to incorportate into y'all's lives...be honest in telling her that. its just not safe with all these diseases out here, and condoms dont gurantee protection from all of them!
if you give her an ultimatum you gotta stick with it..that toughlove stuff....otherwise it will be a hellish life of heartache and pain continually....
the choice is hard, espeically if you're married and you love this person...i wish you the best....
2007-04-30 02:42:57 · answer #4 · answered by D.... 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her go. If this is the life she wants now, she will either drag herself down with this, or both of you if you don't leave now. Drugs and wild sex only lead to death or disaster. Not a good path!
2007-04-30 02:37:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yup now u got urself into a deeper prob.
u shouldnt have bring another woman to bed, but its nvr too late, tell her straight up or she stop doing drugs.and cheatin or the marriage its over...u dont want to be with some1 that will be always cheatin on u. so stop that now before u get more hurt.
2007-04-30 02:36:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, im really sorry, but the only advice i could give you is to make an ultimatum. she either gets therapy (drug and marriage) or you leave and take everything. you dont deserve to be treated like this, especially by someone who promised to spend the rest of her life with you. either she gets help and you fix your marriage, or you leave and find a quality woman whom wont do this to you. good luck and prayers.
2007-04-30 02:37:55 · answer #7 · answered by kosarsosar 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Drugs, cheating, what's next? Dude, get out. Save yourself.
2007-04-30 02:40:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave her and for the kid go to court and have him living with you i been tro your situation she cheated on you alot of times i think after the 3rd time she did it should be the last
2007-04-30 18:02:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its time to make an ultimatum.
I'm glad you saw your mistake, either she stops or you walk.
Divorce shpuld never be the first option becuase its always the last - so try to get her help first.
2007-04-30 02:34:53 · answer #10 · answered by INDUSTRYkurt 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋