help you moved on? You don't want to lose him but you have to let go...would hating him makes it easier?
2007-04-29 13:47:48 · 20 answers · asked by finding_answers 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i would most definately say yes...hate can replace love...only because that person has done something hurtful towards you...love and hate are just like boundaries...one foot here or there can make a difference
hating him can make it easier...but it doesnt make it go away...its best not to have hatred against anyone...it will never give you peace of mind...
forgive, forget move on...i have been hurt before as well...i did hate the other person for a long time...until there came a time...it didnt matter anymore...the other person has moved on...so should i...dont torture yourself...just go out there and have fun
although its easier said then done...relax take some time out...reflect...forgive him(dont have to tell him) smile and T.I.E (take it easy)
2007-04-29 13:55:16 · answer #1 · answered by Vincent K 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is a fine line between love and hate. You are still giving him his thoughts and energy. The best way to move on is too feel nothing. Hating someone can and will come back to bite you and could even destroy you. The best way to deal with this is success. The less energy you give someone the more control you have. The more energy you give someone: Hate, anger, revenge ext. The more control the other person has.
2007-05-04 21:38:48 · answer #2 · answered by flateach33 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hatred can replace love for a little while, but you don't want it to just sit there and fester. It will make you a bitter old woman.
I've moved on. I loved him with all my heart....unfortunately, he left after 11 months of marraige for a girl half my age (a teenager and former student of his). I hated him for a while, because it made it hurt less. But now I just pity him. If he has to be cradle-robbing when he had everything he could ever want with me, then sure, let him end up in jail. I'm much better off without him.
2007-04-29 20:54:47 · answer #3 · answered by BarbieGurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No....proper letting go is more appropriate than hate...hate is not good, physically as well as mentally...letting go is better. It is more peaceful to let go of someone that cannot meetd you own individual means through their lack of ability or want to change for the better....letting go is coming to that point where you are comfortable with the fact that they can't or won't change and you're acceptance of that fact.....that is a much better point to be in....better and easier for you to move on and rebuild your life w/ someone that can meet your needs...
2007-04-29 22:21:15 · answer #4 · answered by prouddaddy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Emotions like love and hate are very powerful.
If you know in your head that you must let go, the problem is with your heart if you feel like you won't be able to.
Thinking of the reasons for breaking up and remembering sad or unpleasant things might help you at first....Hurtful and unkind words can help you to stand firm and not give in.
But later you must not contaminate yourself with hate. It is poison and it can destroy you.
2007-04-29 20:54:25 · answer #5 · answered by Nena S 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No hating him would make it worst. You will have to some how let him go. You know the saying " if you love someone let him go . If he comes back to you , then you know it was meant to be".
2007-05-05 18:53:42 · answer #6 · answered by tanlaask 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing that will help you to move on is to forgive him for what he has done to you, forgive yourself for whatever you think you need to forgive yourself for ( staying with him, hating, etc). Some people think that they are withholding something from the other by holding on to the painand resentment. Forgive and move on. Holding a grudge is like eating poison and waiting for the other person to die.
2007-05-04 19:42:08 · answer #7 · answered by newyorktilson 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Indifference is the opposite of love. Hate can be in close proximity to love. There are several stages to loss. I seem to remember hate being one of them. You will find it somewhere in the self help section.
2007-05-04 15:27:53 · answer #8 · answered by PhilaBuster 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to have a real good reason to hate him not just a made up one or your gonna keep coming back to where you are. You don't have to hate them to move on just give it time -time will heal you I promise . It always does.
2007-04-29 21:07:06 · answer #9 · answered by lyttledarlin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it will have the folowing negative consequences..
What will be some negative effects of your hatred?
Because of your hatred toward a person or group of people, I find that I am:
never fully happy or content.
bitter and cold toward almost everybody in my life.
not sought out by others to be a friend.
socially isolated and lonely.
caustic, hostile, sarcastic, and cynical.
embittered, saddened, and desolate a good part of the time.
lacking in enthusiasm, energy, and spontaneity in my daily life.
cold, distant, and aloof in my dealings with others.
mistrusting, paranoid, and suspicious in my relationships.
stuck in my quest for healthy self-esteem.
guilty over the negative feelings that I can't let go of.
easily provoked to anger and my "hot buttons'' are pushed when the person or group of people I hate is mentioned in any positive way.
wasteful in the expenditure of my emotional energy by venting my chronic negative feelings.
prone to over-compensate by behaving in a completely opposite way from those I hate.
unable to get on with my life; I tend to dwell on or blame everything on my past.
touchy, highly emotional, or overly sensitive when my "hateful'' behavior is pointed out to me.
defensive about my right to hold on to my hateful beliefs.
more focused on those I hate than on myself and my personal growth.
closed to the suggestion to forgive and forget the past and get on with the present.
prone to lose sight of my personal power and my ability to chose what I want to feel or do.
overwhelmed by my bitterness and anger.
unable to be optimistic.
unwilling to believe that it is my choice to feel hatred.
stubborn, unwilling to accept that often people have done the best that they could knowing what they did at the time.
2007-05-05 18:03:33 · answer #10 · answered by Boston Bluefish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋