tried of bn treated like ****. ready to start anew. many yrs of cntrln attude,i have a luvly home ,3 grt kid, he pays all bills, but tells my that becse i dnt belve in god the same way he does i will nvr get any blessing unless it cms from him . i can't deal any more.
2007-04-29 02:06:51 · 14 answers · asked by mykids4me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Before you tell him, I'd line things up. I don't know your situation, but I'd sit down and talk with a family attorney to determine your likely situation regarding child custody, support, maintenance, property division, etc. If you need to find a job, I'd find one. If you need to find a place to live, find that too, even if it's temporary. I hope there's no physical abuse involved, but if there is, find a place to go where you'll be protected. If you're going to have to move out of the family residence, have a date set and a plan for accomplishing the move. After everything's in place, sit down with your husband and explain the situation. Then swing your plan into action as quickly as possible. Good luck to you. This is one of the most stressful and disruptive things that can happen in life. Tell us how it turned out. It may not seem like it now, but things will be better eventually.
2007-04-29 02:21:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seriously? Okay...first of all, if you;re sure you want to leave him, try to find a place to stay and what jobs you may be qualified for. My greatest worry would be the kids, and theres really no way of knowing how it will go.
I guess you have to decide whether or not your children will suffer more if you stay married or get divorced.
Whether not you're okay with and can live with either outcome.
Then try to plan out how you will survive (financially and such) without him.
Sorry, those are th most important things I could think of. other than those things, however way you tell him is fine (unless hes violent, then Irecommend doing it with a friend or family member close by).
2007-04-29 02:15:19 · answer #2 · answered by AD 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since he probably has no idea that you want out maybe you should cool yourself down and take this slowly. The problem here is lack of respect. Your husband has been able to dominate the marriage up to this point but it looks like you've just about had enough of it.
My advise is to have a concerned talk with him . Tell him you don;t feel he respects you as an equal in this marriage and that your faith should not be made an issue. Tell him you feel that the marriage is falling apart and that your patience is running out but you want to make an effort to make it better. If your marriage fails, you can tell him, he will look just as bad as you in the eyes of you religion. Tell him it's just as much his responsibility to make it work as yours and you are fast losing confidence in it.
Make this a shared problem not just yours or his. If you at least try you will have a better feeling inside that you are doing your best to solve a serious problem. If all else fails divorce is always an option. But let me tell you it's a very hard and expensive road to travel. 20 years is a long time invested in a marriage to just throw it away without trying to save it. I'm sorry for your hardship. Good luck.
2007-04-29 02:26:24 · answer #3 · answered by IveBeenThere 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many years of mental abuse has to be hard on you. Walk away and never look back but make sure you get some help because you will need it. Right now your self esteem is probably pretty low and you will need some counseling to get over that and you didn't deserve to be treated like that and disrespected for so many years. He will have to continue to provide for you and the children so you should be okay financially and plus your will probably need to work on top of what he will give you to make ends meet, but its better than sitting around and taking all that abuse. If you have no where to go you may want to start off in a shelter of some sorts but anyway good luck to you and hopefully things will work out.
2007-04-29 02:15:05 · answer #4 · answered by Pegi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is over, it's over. Just be carefull life gets very hard after a divorce. Good luck and God bless.
2007-04-29 02:13:08 · answer #5 · answered by Wild Bill 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't suggest writing a letter to him, he may not be able to understand it.
Well, just tell him to his face that you've had enough of being treated the way you are and tell him that you want a divorce.
2007-04-29 02:10:36 · answer #6 · answered by don't stop the music ♪ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you a sure this is it you must be honest with him and honest as to why... but before have a plan for getting out{money,place to stay etc,do you work]? you have to think alot issues through to get out with your kids ... just be prepared when you tell him you are done...
2007-04-29 03:21:53 · answer #7 · answered by MJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he should respect your way you believe in god me and my gf dont believe the same way either but its not a issue he must be very shollow minded you are probly why better with out him
2007-04-29 02:35:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, literacy skills are very important in the world these days. Are you sure you can find yourself a job or read the divorce papers?
2007-04-29 02:14:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
divorce papers baby u get half of everything now find a nice guy
2007-04-29 02:10:20 · answer #10 · answered by Mrblack 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋