why is it so much easier?

Question

to be more open and honest with strangers than friends? I mean in general real life and basically in general. Like, it's so much easier for me to talk to someone I've just met rather than friends I see everyday. It's as if they listen to you more, huh? Idk, I must sound pathetic, sorry, but I can't help but wonder. Why is this so? Please no rude answers, thank you = )

Answer 1

because you have nothing invested with a stranger, you don't really care about their opinion of you after you tell them something juicy. With friends or family you are afraid of their judgement about what you revealed and you are afraid it will change your relationship with them.

Answer 2

I do the same thing actually. I think it's because when you're talking to your friends you afraid of how their going to judge you based on past expereiences with you, or of how they might percieve you in future situations. With strangers they have nothing to base your actions on. I mean sometimes if I have a problem with my boyfriend or something and I tell my best friend shes like well you said the same thing a year ago with so-and-so- and I just want a completely unbiased opinion. That or if you do sometihng your ashamed of, you know your friends are going to be dissapointed and you dont want that! Sometimes you just want sympathy. So you got trashed at a party and made a complete *** out of yourself by running naked down the street - a stranger would say wow thats funn y- or wow thats too bad. Your friends may know that u did the same crap last week and not be so amused...lol

But on the flip side - your friends know you better and can give you better advice- most times you just don't to listen to them becasue deep down you know it's true (if you have good friends that is)

Answer 3

I imagine it could stem from not wanting your intimate friends to judge the things you say or you may not want to think outside the lines of your peer group. For me, I have few intimate friends and obviously they started out as strangers, and I tend to let loose my personality/views on strangers because I have no fears as to how they will perceive me. Mainly, due to the fact that they're strangers and If I say or do something they find interesting then an already comfort level has already begun to grow. Did that make sense? In a nut shell, it's easier because you initially have nothing to lose, being yourself with a stranger, than you would normally with your friends. bye.....

Answer 4

It's because strangers hold no special place in your life, so you're not invested emotionally. They don't know your background and anything about your interpersonal relationships so they are not apt to make judgements or get angry over something you might say. For instance, you could tell a stranger, "I broke up with my boyfriend because he was mean to me." The stranger would say, "Ah, that's terrible, well, your lucky to be rid of him." But what if you broke up with your boyfriend because he was mean to you AFTER you poured sugar down his gas tank, stole money from him, and got him fired from his job." Your friends would know this info so they'd be more apt to say, "Well, yes, he was mean to you but look what you did to him first," You might find it more difficult to tell your friends these kinds of details because they would sometimes find fault on your part. As far as strangers listening more, they might because they don't want to be rude. But your best friend who feels more comfortable with you might say, "Hey, I can't talk now, I have to go to the store but I'll call you later." You don't sound pathetic, by the way! Hope this answers your question!

Answer 5

I think the answer to that is easy...no rudeness required!! LOL

We aren't so hung up on what strangers think about us. They aren't in our immediate circle of family and close friends, so opening up to them may seem easier for you. They don't know you, you don't know them, so they'll be less likely to judge you. Strangers also don't have any pre-conceived notions about us, so some of us may feel more comfortable going into the heavy stuff with them. Since they don't know us, we don't get the feeling that they are giving us that "look".

Answer 6

Well, usually when you tell people you know more, your afraid of being judged and labelled. They can tell others that you know, etc. and it's just more comfortable to be in a room filled with (nice-looking, no knives at your neck, now) strangers and to be yourself, than to be out with your friends, because there's more people, it's more peer pressure to go against. Strangers tend to have to be polite, too, so they won't make fun of you or something humiliating.

Answer 7

I think it's cause strangers don't have expectations of you, they don't know you, therefore you don't feel judged. Most people find it easier to open up to people they don't know. If you really want good advice along with a listening ear, counselling would do wonders (:

Answer 8

It's as Sunshine says--also you may be tailoring your personality to fit the person you're talking with in your friend-circle! I may be reading something of myself here, but as a young person, I felt I had to fit in with the people around me--to be acceptable to them. As I grew up and left that area, I discovered myself, my own personality and didn't really care if I were "acceptable" to people around me. It was SUCH a relief!! I was able to breathe! I'm sure your situation isn't as extereme as mine! No, you DON'T sound pathetic!! I realized how restricted I was growing up...when I left the area, I was myself and found that people that I liked, liked me!! I didn't pull in people who were phoney themselves or those who would use me!! Congratulations in finding your own true self!!

Answer 9

When you talk to strangers, you don't have anything to lose and you don't have to worry about them changing their opinion of you or judging you.

Answer 10

I don't find that!! I need to get to know a person before I'll open up about anything!!