What should I do about my mom?

Question

I was accepted to nursing sch at the last minute last fall, my mom agreed to keep my 6 y/o for the 1st school yr so i can get settled which has turn out to be a diaster. I have gotten him almost every weekend since I have been here I am two hrs away we either meet halfway or I go home. Here it is the end of the semester already, I have final for the next two wks then I am done. When he gets out of sch in June he will come and live w/me. My mom wentioned going to a wedding this weekend and maybe going to play golf Sun, all I asked her was how long she was goin to be playn golf b/c I have a final on Mon.and need to study, I cannot study w/him he is very attn demanding and she knows that. She went off !!!! She that there is always a prob when he has to come here and Blah blah, the only time I was irritated was when i had made plans to go out and she told me at the last min she wanted to work but he is MY son so **** it I couldnt go( by theway I never go out) So I talked to her earlier and

told her to bring him and she said OK. Now she is sayn nevermind and she was crying on the phone and I asked what was wrong she said nothing but I know thats not true, am I being selfish?

I know she is tired but Damn I will be done in 2 yrs she said she would help what the hell did she think I was exaggerating when I said it was hard to take care of him and go to school now she sees how rough it was for me. Now I feel bad and guilty for tryn to finish school, like I am outting my responsibility off on her she said that she would keep him now there is a problem!!!!!!!

I AM NOT MARRIED why would I need her help if I were married

Quit school Haha not even going to happen!!!!!!!!!1

Father is a deadbeat not going to happen I live here alone have no help!!!!

Answer 1

You maybe are being a little selfish - but there again - I applaud you for your efforts at getting your life for you and your son back on track.

I wonder though.

Do you show enough gratitude?

I am sure that your mother loves having your son around very much but don't forget - she thought she was finished with all this stuff - and as you said - your son is quite a handful, and she is a good few years older than you! Its not so easy running around after them at that age when you are feeling just that little bit middle aged!

If you were to pay your mother that extra little bit of attention and tell her just how much you are thankful to her and that her contribution towards yours and your son future is worth more than anything she has ever done for you - she just needs to hear 'thank you mum' - sincerely.

I think that you both need each other very much - but remember that you have a lot of stuff on your mind that takes up a lot of your time - she is left with a youngster and the usual everyday stuff that mums get landed with. And that is not the most exciting stuff in the world!

Just try not to be too hard on her. You may think that you have it hard - and i am sure that you have - but i don't suppose for one minute that she goes around dressed as WonderWoman does she?

It wil all work out in the end - she loves you and her grandson. Just give her a little bit of space and then get back to her and tell her how much you love her and thank her for all her help.

She maybe your mum - but she's only human!

Good luck with the nursing and everything else - I'm sure you will come through this with flying colours - all of you!

Answer 2

You are being somewhat selfish. Keep in mind you brought this child into the world and he is not your mother's primary responsibility. It seems she's helped you out a lot but she should be able to have free time. She's already raised her children. You should spend a little money, hire a babysitter or make arrangements with the father instead of totally relying on your mom.

Answer 3

Unfortunately, it sounds like you resent your son, and having him on the weekends. Your mother has taken him all week, and would need some down time for herself. From an older perspective, and babysitting a youngster myself, I know that it can be pretty draining. Your son takes up your free time on weekends, and you can't go out and enjoy yourself, that's too bad. Your only option, would be to study, when your son is asleep, and do the best you can with your finals.

Answer 4

This is not your mother's problem. It is yours! You are the one that had him. She has raised her children. I think it is great that you are trying to get an education. But I am sure there is a school close to were you mom lives, that you could attend. Why not move in with your mom get a part-time job and go to school part-time. Yes it will take you longer, but you made your bed. As of going out you need to hire a sitter. There are plenty of single mother's that do this. You need to quit thinking of yourself and start thinking of your son.

Answer 5

you are being somewhat selfish, it is great that you're going to nursing school and while your mom did agree to keep your son, she still has a life of her own and is entitled to still keep her normal life in-spite of the fact that your child is with her, just as you are wanting free time to yourself to go out etc, your mom needs sometime to do her own thing as well, you seems resentful towards your son because of your lack of freedom that you don't have, your mom is trying to help you out the best she can while helping you maintain a consistent normal relationship with your son even though you two are apart from each other, you should show her alittle more appreciation for what she is doing for you, you are just going to have to learn to balance out your life alittle better now since school a priority for you, but you have to remember that you son is also a priority for you as well and you are his parent, so it is your first responsibility to make sure that he is getting what he needs from you because your mom cannot fill your place all the time.....

Answer 6

Yes you are being selfish. Maybe your husband can take over the role of parenting, rather than your mom. Maybe you need to quit nursing school until your child is older or you make other arrangements.

Answer 7

sounds like your mom is overwhelmed because she has him all week. I'm sure you could figure out a way to keep your son occupied for awhile while you study. Hire a babysitter if you can afford it,if not you'll have to be creative so your son can keep his attention on something else.

Answer 8

yes u r being selfish and u r hurting your son too by not spending enough time with him , he is your son not your moms, other mothers manage to do it all ,u should have yourself an apartment and raise your son too and put him in daycare or hire a sitter

Answer 9

make a desk for him beside yours and let him study with you, you will have quality time with him and build good study habits for him. It is your child. Yes you are selfish. What would you do if your Mother was not available?

Answer 10

oooookkkkkkkk i have no idea what you said. sheesh why is this a flippen prob anyway? it makes no sense! tell her if she won't take care if him for a while for you that you will make her pay for a flippen daycare!