I recently found out that my boyfriend took some vicodin pills out of my medicine bottle. I take it sometimes when I am in pain. Now, he admitted that he has an addiction. He says that he's been addicted for about one year. I don't know what to do. I have a 4 year old daughter. The thing about my bf is that he is the sweetest, smartest man I have ever met. He is in college right now getting straight A's, he has a great job, and he is completely normal. He treats me like a queen, he is very patient, and he accepts the fact that I have a disability (he has taken care of me when I was sick). BUT, he did lie to me. He does have an addiction. He did steal pills from me. He only takes 3 pills a day, which shouldn't minimize his addiction, but I don't know what to do. He has never put me in any kind of danger, and he proved to me by his medical records that he has been getting the pills legally. Should I break up? I love him, but I have my daughter in the picture too.
2007-04-27 10:15:04 · 22 answers · asked by chickenbeansoup 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Another detail: he always supports me. He has helped me with my car and rent payment in the past and NEVER asks for anything in return. This would be an easy decision if he was a jerk, but like I said, he is the sweetest man
PS: For anyone who is wondering, my disability is Cerebral Palsy (I walk with the assistance of forearm crutches).
PS:HE EMPHATICALLY WANTS TO QUIT, BUT through outpatient help.
2007-04-27 10:15:30 · update #1
If you love him, why would you leave him? He stuck with you when you were sick. Also he is only taking three per day, that's not a big deal.
2007-04-27 10:26:33 · answer #1 · answered by Kari R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a wonderful man; you shouldn't give up on him...remember all the times he's been there for you? Now it's your turn to be there for him...
First off, lock up all narcotics, and never, ever let him have the key. It would be better to keep the narcotics at a trusted friends house, if possible.
Then, insist he get treatment for his addiction. There are fantastic counseling services out there...he needs professional help to get through this.
He also needs to talk to his doctor about this, to find a non-narcotic pain reliever that will work for him.
Addictions have a tendency to get worse...it's only three pills a day (which is quite a bit of Vicodin, btw) but next year, without proper treatment, he could be taking a whole lot more pills a day. Then, he could get snappy and irritable without them, and he could threaten you to get more Vicodin. It doesn't sound like he is nearly that bad yet, but he's on his way...
If he honestly wants to break his addiction, is willling to seek treatment, and you are willing to help him through this and compromise by keeping your narcotics away from him, then there's no reason to leave an otherwise perfect man.
That's just my opinion, though...you should talk to an addiction support group (families of those with addictions) for better advice.
Edit: after reading other's answers...this isn't a reflection of how much or now little he loves you...he might love you so much he'd die for you, but he can't control his addiction...he lied to you and stole from you because he's addicted.
2007-04-27 10:21:47 · answer #2 · answered by rita_alabama 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he wants to quit, stand by him and support him. Three pills a day is not much - some people take as much as 50 pills a day (or more); now, THAT's addiction. It sounds like he might have a very good chance of recovery, please help him if you can. Of course, he may be lying about the amount of medication he takes; there's no telling - addicts often minimize the extent of their problem. But I think the least you can do is try to help him face it, and be as patient with him as he was with you. It doesn't sound like he is a danger to your daughter or to you - please give him a chance. Start by having him see a doctor, and go from there.
2007-04-27 10:27:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel like you have opened the pandora box. Now that he has stolen them from you ones he is apt to do it again. Now that he is infact stealing them it means his adiction is getting worse. That is a controled med. You can only get so many a month and no more. By law if you run out a Dr can not refill before 30 days. What happens if you run out and yo9u trully need the meds. He is now putting your life in danger. He sounds like a great guy but this kind of addition gets the best of them. I work in the medical field and I've seen alot of great people get addicted to pills and it is awful. He is taking more then 3 pills a day. He would not hit your supply if he was taking them as perscribed.... he would not run out. You have a mess on your hands and he needs help. It is a long hard sad road and I feel for you.
2007-04-27 10:24:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you love your daughter enough to stand up for what is right, and you love your man, then tell him you understand his addiction...it's an illness. You suffer from an illness (cp) too. The difference is, you didn't chose yours. He did. Now he has to chose to stop. Tell him that he needs to get on it pronto (the breaking his addiction cycle) or you will have to remove yourself and your daughter from the situation. I can understand you not wanting to walk out on him with him being so supportive for you, but you also do not want your daughter to think this is acceptable behavior. Also, addictive personalities usually start with one thing, and go to something else when the feel good feeling from one thing wears off. This needs to be nipped in the bud NOW. He can get help as an outpatient in this case, but I'd almost insist he go to weekly group meetings as well, to let him see how ugly something like this can become.
2007-04-27 10:25:17 · answer #5 · answered by a_lot_smarter_now 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is your problem girl Like i told you before he helps you then you should help him that's what real couples do . If you want to go over something like that then go but your not much of a person and just using the guy for what you can get out of him . Vicodin aren't all that addicting and easy to get over the addiction
2007-04-27 10:31:24 · answer #6 · answered by dad 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I strongly suggest that your BF should seek help from some drug addiction rehab or what you can do is start your own rehab program and make a plan and follow that plan it is not very hard to get rid of addiction only IF you make a good plan and follow it. Try to decrease the usage amount slowly and seek some medical help
2007-04-27 17:46:51 · answer #7 · answered by Ginder2000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well from what it sounds like you don't want to break up with him. It sounds like this guy is perfect save for his addiction to vicoden. You should talk to him about it, and get him to realize his problem and then the both of you together can seek outside help such as counciling or something to that effect, or maybe a 12 step program.
2007-04-27 10:23:49 · answer #8 · answered by Mearah M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him a chance to prove to you he doesn't want to be an addict anymore. Stand by your man so long as it's not going to hurt you guys.
Sounds lame, but is an addiction to vicodin really that bad? What does he do? Just mellow out?
2007-04-27 10:31:59 · answer #9 · answered by Dr. Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yikes. Addictions are frightening. the certainty he needs help is a sturdy difficulty, if he's telling the fact. He desires to chat to his physician approximately it and get a referral. different than that, there are places you will desire to call to get help. i do no longer understand the place you reside, yet there would desire to be some style of help. look contained in the yellow pages, contained in the County government pages under wellness & Human centers. There would desire to be some style of Alcohol & different drugs Prevention variety which you would be able to call. additionally attempt looking up Narcotics nameless or Alcoholics nameless contained in the white pages. And contained in the yellow pages under Drug Abuse & habit advice & therapy centers. sturdy success! And word which you would be able to help him in his efforts, yet provided that he's easy, and purely he can paintings on his restoration. you are able to no longer do it for him.
2016-10-04 00:23:37 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People who are addicted to drugs will do anything to keep their supply going...and I mean anything...He is gonna do anything to keep you happy, no matter what....I am sure he really goes out of his way for you, but deep down there is a reason...Vicodin....
Don't be fooled...try saying you have given up the drug & see what happens...this will be the only way you can prove it too yourself.
2007-04-27 10:36:33 · answer #11 · answered by Kerilyn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋