My 'so-called' best friend of 15+ yrs has been acting really odd lately. When I try to talk to her, she comes off as everything is fine and there is nothing wrong. Even when she hurts me, she acts like she did nothing wrong and expects me to be ok. She knows what she is doing, I have been friends with this girl for almost over 15 yrs, I am not reading into things.....or am I?
It all started about 2 months or so ago....my fiance and I finally set a wedding date....and she was the 1st person I called. Right off the bat she started telling me what she will or will not wear, that absolutely no-one will touch her hair/makeup...that she would cut off all her hair, the shoes, and everything else! I just sat there and was like....1st- I thought this was MY wedding...2nd-are you kidding me....it is too early to deal with this crap and she knows, or should know already, that I wouldn't let her stand by me as my matron of honor looking like a clown!.....story continues below.
2007-04-27 07:30:44 · 12 answers · asked by Mrs. Connors! 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
So I called her back later to discuss why she acted like that so soon, and more excuses came pouring out....about starting a family and might be on travel restrictions...so I told her if she doesn't want to be in the wedding that is fine. She insists on being in the wedding - but if 'I' choose to not want her in it over a dress, then I have to live with it. She even dragged her hubby in it and caused problems with him...meanwhile, we haven't even tried any dresses on, nor did I even know what I wanted the girls to even wear....she started jumping to conclusions and raised all kinds of troubles in the process.
I calmed her down and everything seemed fine...or so she led me to believe.
She came to my house previous to this discuss and proceeded to insult me in my own home.
One of our friends got married on April 14th...I was supposed to go with her. She kept telling me that she was staying with me, and that we would have so much fun, and we would check out dresses the next day
2007-04-27 08:02:14 · update #1
well, she called me a week before the wedding and said that I don't have to go to the wedding (after I bought a dress) - that she asked her mom to go. Not once did she say anything to me....all she had to do was call me and say "would you mind if I asked my mom to go with me" and I would've have encouraged her to do so....since she moved out of state she doesn't get to see her mom or me that much.
She said that we would still look at dresses on Sunday before she left, since there are no wedding shops near her.
She came to town on Thursday, never called and left Sunday without calling me once to say "Hi, I am in the area, don't have time to stop by"...nothing.
How can you forget to call you best friend when you come back in the area, and forget about the dresses? especially if you say you want to be in the wedding so bad?!
2007-04-27 08:07:15 · update #2
Oh, and she finally posted the wedding pics online.....guess who was wearing a deep neckline, shear sleeves, and strappy shoes! the same person who freaked out on me for liking similar styles!
I am extremely hurt by this....and I don't know if I should fight for this friendship or not. I mean....15 years.....it's a long time!
2007-04-27 08:09:08 · update #3
best friends accept each other for the way they r.... talk to her in a way ...nicely w/ your plans at another time & ask her if she thinks it would be ok if she would ....then tell her what you want.... sometimes you need to handle the situation w/ kit gloves. Stubborn people r hard to deal w/ but u need to try. Her unique ways r special ....thats part of the reason she is your best friend,....They r hard to replace so try to come to a joint solution together and don't be offended . She is your best friend other than the man you r about to marry. How does she feel about that?
2007-04-27 07:59:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Were you a brides maid or maid of honor for her wedding? If the answer is yes and this is how you acted, what goes round comes round.
I don't think this is the case so my advice would be tell her right up front you are disappointed that she feels she has the right to chose what should be your choice for your day. If you have not asked her to be your matron of honor...don't, until you find out where this hostility is coming from.
Something is not right with her.
2007-04-27 14:52:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like the so called "best friend" I used to have! She pulled so much crap over the 14 years we were friends it was ridiculous!
It wasn't till 2005 I finally had HAD IT!
I just stopped talking to her. She is a *****! Always has been and always will be!
It's just not worth it. I would rather have no friends than be friends with her.
Who needs enemies with friends like them!
2007-04-27 14:42:40 · answer #3 · answered by someoneoutthere 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's Hating! Jealousy can always ruin a relationship. Talk to her and be as open and candid as possible. Don't come off as a bridezilla though, just tell her how she makes you feel when she does or says things. Let her know that she is important to you but she is driving you away, if it continues then you have to let her go.
2007-04-27 14:39:54 · answer #4 · answered by E. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me as if she is very jealous. You can really tell who your friends were at a time like this. She should be supportive and happy for you. What a witch!!!
2007-04-27 14:43:54 · answer #5 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take qa deep breath, I know you're frustrated. I think you need to sit down and talk with her and see if you can save the friendship. If she's not willing, then you have your answer
2007-04-27 14:35:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My opinion she's either jealous, trying to look better than you or both. Tell her this is how it's gonna go. Are you here for me or you?
If she says that she's for you, then tell her shut the f*ck up!!
2007-04-27 14:39:02 · answer #7 · answered by twdy412 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs Prozac urgently!does she even know that it's not really etiquette to behave like a spoilt litle brat when it's not even her shindig,u need to let her know who is running this show!
2007-04-27 14:42:53 · answer #8 · answered by Mickey mouse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok soo this seems as though she is actually jealous. you should just ignore it and if it gets worse talk to her in private and make her tell you whats going on
2007-04-27 14:35:59 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs. Ochoa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
forget her, its your day not hers, she should be proud to call you her friend but apparently she is taking you for granted and you dont need someone like that at your wedding
2007-04-27 14:34:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋