My hubby is mentally ill and physically ill as well, however he refuses to get any type of help and refuses to work-I just want out-any ideas?
2007-04-27 06:47:28 · 12 answers · asked by perfectmom88 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Call a lawyer. There are hundreds of them in Iowa and you can divorce a husband, because he is mentally ill or just because you don't like the way he watches t.v. all the time. There's no stigma attached to divorce so find out. Call a lawyer, today ... and most major cities have free legal aid.
2007-04-27 06:50:14 · answer #1 · answered by John B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can get out, if that is what you want, just find an attorney who will draw up the papers and you can have it. But you really ought to think about this before you make such a huge decision. A mental illness is no different than a physical illness, it is society that has made the inequality. Did his mental illness occur before or after the injury? Because often the two are linked. You have to understand, that this type of a blow is devistating to a man's ego. He is suffering from things that are out of his control, he might just be ready to give in to negative thinking that says "I have no value anymore. I am worth nothing, and now my wife doesn't even want me. There is no point in getting help, because I think everyone would be better off if I just ended it all." These kinds of thoughts are common to people who have suffered the trauma of illness. Why? Because society thinks you are only worthy if you are "contributing" either financially or emotionally. If you aren't doing that, then we will just shun you, and write you off. After all, you aren't even trying. In fact you are refusing to do what you should be doing.
These are hard words, but it is the truth. And people who haven't suffered like this or been on the receiving end of this type of criticism just don't understand. I realize how trying it must be for you, to have to be the provider and sustainer of your family, but when you married him, did you vow to love him in sickness and in health, or just health? If he is as low as it sounds, you getting "out" might just be the straw that breaks whatever he has left to cling to in this world.
2007-04-27 07:01:20 · answer #2 · answered by williams040906 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Here:
http://www.judicial.state.ia.us/Self_Help/Family_Law/Divorce/
2007-04-27 06:51:03 · answer #3 · answered by wizjp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure I am going to get slammed for saying this after so many people have advised you to run and run fast. But when you married your husband, and you looked across at him and said the words 'In sickness and in health', were you actually thinking in your head 'In sickness and in health as long as you don't develop schizophrenia'...? I am guessing you weren't. If you were the one that had developed this horrible illness, would you be happy knowing that he would cast aside the 'in sickness and in health' part so quickly? If you don't feel it would be safe right now to have children together, then don't. If you don't feel it would be safe to be living with him at this point, then don't. Your physical safety under the threat of actual harm should come first. But there are a lot of community resources and support groups that you can at least try first, that will offer support to you yourself. And if 'He does take medication and see doctors, but they seem to have a minimal effect'...Find another doctor! Try other medications! Exhaust every option! People, please don't bash me too hard. And OP, sincerely, the best of luck to you.
2016-05-20 15:22:12 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce is Divorce. Proving he is mentally and physically ill would be if you want control of his assets because he's not "capable" of administering his own affairs. However, since you want a divorce simply contact a lawyer and file for one.
2007-04-27 06:50:35 · answer #5 · answered by jay k 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Iowa is a no-fault divorce state so you don't have to establish grounds for divorce. All you need to do is contact a divorce lawyer and file.
2007-04-29 08:33:55 · answer #6 · answered by Kraftee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think anyone who is from Iowa has to have some sort of mental illness.
2007-04-27 06:50:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The obvious - call an Iowa lawyer.
2007-04-27 06:49:27 · answer #8 · answered by ra63 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look in the yellow pages, go use the free half hour consult most lawyers give,
2007-04-27 06:50:05 · answer #9 · answered by rich2481 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do need to ask you did you not know that he was like this before you got married?You can check with your local court house.
2007-04-27 06:51:37 · answer #10 · answered by hendersonswoman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋