My daughters father is suppose to pick her up from school this afternoon. He text 9am to say that he wouldn't be able to pick her up because he has to do something, and then he's going to work and when he gets off he won't have time to get her by the time she gets out of school. He said that he can meet me tomorrow to get her.
I told him, that I have already arranged to work late for someone. He then said that he wouldn't be able to get her and that I would have to find someone to pick her up. I asked him why did he decide to go to work afterwards, (he has a job he can makeup the hours), he could pick her up first than go to work (desk job, no one would be around). He said that said couldn't get her. I told him it was his weekend and that if she's not picked up from school they will call CPS. He always wants me to rearrange my schedule when he doesn't want to pick her up. He could have done 'whatever' yesterday or tomorrow. Why the day he has to pick up our daughter?
2007-04-27 06:02:48 · 11 answers · asked by Ty 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
CPS has no jurisdisction here. Believe me, I know. It is hard enough to have a baby in my home that WAS abused neglected, abanoned, and CPS 'acknowledged' the events, but "weeded" the case out to social services. I believe a child has to be in danger for his or her life before CPS is going to do anything.
If you have custody, you can not FORCE the non-custodial parent to take 'visitation'. If you are the primary parent, no matter what, it is your responsibility to see the needs of that child are met.
I understand it is inconvienet, and rude of your ex, to let you know last minute, but....these things happen, and you are the one who needs to go get your daughter.
I know these things, I've been a single parent for 9 years. My son's father, 'legally stole' custody from me. I've been fighting in the courts ever since.
The baby is my nephew, and she was granted 4 hours supervisied visitation every two weeks. She has seen her (my) baby twice, a total of 8 hours this YEAR.
The courts give me baby that is not mine, yet won't let me have my OWN son back after it was proven Dad and ex-stepmom were skirting the law when they did what they did.
Regardless, you will be the one to look bad if you leave your poor daughter at the school. Document what happened.....
2007-05-05 04:35:36 · answer #1 · answered by inzbrkqt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you can certainly let the school call CPS to pick up your child. Or, do you have a friend or family member who can pick her up?
How long has this been going on? Is there a routine schedule or does it change week by week? You might want to talk with your lawyer about getting a modification of your visitation if Father keeps finding other things to do than spend time with his daughter.
Do you have a shared parenting arrangement? This works great for some people, but it also reduces the child support payment for the non-custodial parent and that can be a prime factor in having it put in place. Think about Father's motives for the custodial agreement you have.
Remember, the Court's interest in this matter is to have the best possible outcome for your daughter. Is this your goal, also? Or are you wanting to "make" the father do your will? Or is he wanting to control you still?
So many things to consider....
2007-04-27 06:14:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 2⤋
It neither of you pick up your daughter and CPS does get involved, then you are BOTH likely to lose custody and she will end up in foster care.
It could possibly be negligence on his part if he couldn't pick her up and didn't and just left her there and didn't call you or the school, then you could seek to supervised visitations only, but that is not what happened.
He informed you and if you don't make arrangements for her to be picked up, YOU are the one being negligent.
Simple solution is if he is not going to be, then don't rely on him to pick her up ever again in the future, make alternate arrangements with a daycare provider, an after school program, friend or relative or work out a different schedule with your employer to ensure she is cared for until you can pick her up. If you have to pay additional amount out every week for a babysitter, daycare or aftercare program to ensure she is picked up/taken care of until you get off work, petition the Court for additional child support from him.
Please don't let a precious child be caught in the middle of head games and power struggles between your and your ex.
2007-04-27 06:37:37 · answer #3 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
He's a total scumbag. Sounds like your daughter will be the one who suffers. You better pick her up. You can't just leave her at school. And CPS has nothing to do with dead beat dads. They wouldn't get involved unless someone was abusing or neglecting your daugter. If you both don't pick her up and then you call CPS they could take your daughter away from both of you. My advice: Don't call CPS. That will cause more problems. They are not a tool to use for vandettas against ex's.
Thumbs down me and ignore my advice and you will pay the price. I work at a law office. I've seen emotionally motivated parents make many many stupid mistakes. It WILL turn into a nightmare if you call CPS.
2007-04-27 06:10:05 · answer #4 · answered by Eisbär 7 · 5⤊ 3⤋
From reading your two paragraphs it is evident that you both have issues you need to resolve for the sake of your child.
If CPS gets involved, it is going to make it hard on both of you as parents. My advice would be to take the high road and find someone to pick up your child. Document the occasion.
2007-04-27 06:19:10 · answer #5 · answered by David C 3 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Wow! I am overcome by the love for the child! I imagine what that poor child is going through knowing that neither parent wants to be a parent first.
Have you considered giving the child up for adoption to someone who would love and cherish the child?
Shame on both of you!
2007-04-27 06:20:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
GO GET YOUR KID! If he can't, then you go, simple as that. Why get CPS involved? You are a parent, suck it up. He's not going to so rely on yourself. It's amazing you are grown up enough to have a kid, both of you!
2007-05-02 17:25:54 · answer #7 · answered by Rhode Island Red 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like hes just not wanting to be there much for her. you can complain about him to a case worker but im sure there is almost nothing they can do about this. not yet, atleast. just keep down the dates, times, and events that he says he will do something and then he doesnt. keeping a record will help later down the road in taking away some rights he has now.
2007-04-27 06:13:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Very simple resolution...you pick her up and have a great weekend with your daughter!! Dad will get the hint.....
2007-04-27 06:11:37 · answer #9 · answered by teddybears 3 · 6⤊ 0⤋
If you have primary custody, it is your responsibility to pick up the child. He is probably working overtime to pay the exorbitant amount of child support that has been court ordered. Make adjustments in your schedule to accomadate the child since you are the primary custodian.
You do not have control over your ex anymore. If CPS is called, it will be your problem
2007-04-27 06:11:38 · answer #10 · answered by rp 4 · 4⤊ 6⤋