Child Custody/Support?

Question

my husband and i have separated. he's been dating and what not aand i was just waiting for it to work out...not gonna happen i guess. anyway, he told me that he was gonna go file for temp custody of the kids. he doesn't take care of them now and the only time he did, he kept my 5 year old son up till 1 am and then didn't take him to school. i don't want to make him pay a bunch of child support, but i can't let him get my kids either. any advise? where do i go to file for temp. custody? do i need a lawyer?

Answer 1

YES HIRE AN ATTORNEY NOW!!!!

Answer 2

You do not need a lawyer. But getting one will help! Make sure you two go to court before letting him have visitation. If he has them when he files for temp cust. the children will have to stay with him until the hearing. It's just in the papers that way. And it gives him a better chance to prove to a judge he is a fit father. My ex did this to me and kept my son for a year till the custody battle was over. I won and I did have a lawyer, but it took a long time. Whoever has the child when the temp order is filed will have to keep the child until the hearing. So KEEP YOUR CHILDREN UNTIL THEN!!!
and good luck to you! I've been there and wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy!

Answer 3

I would suggest you do get a lawyer.
Or stop by the child support division at the states attorneys office.
Explain the situation and tell them he's not fit. You can show proof that you can take care of them and have been. He can't file for temp custody the most he can file is for joint custody.
I think it's kind of different in certain states. Just call your Clerks office, sheriff's office. Or call a free consultation lawyer. Explain what's going on. He/she can help.

Answer 4

You need a lawyer. You can usually find one through legal aid if you can't afford one.
You don't need to let lingering emotions for your husband cloud your judgment about child support. The court will look at both of your incomes plus the amount of time you each care for the children and determine what is fair.
You husband's request for custody is probably so he won't have to pay child support. Don't let him get away with it!
If he's been a lackluster parent up until now and suddenly he wants to be Mr. full time dad, there is a motive.
One thing I can't stress enough, document EVERYTHING!
If he keeps your son up til all hours and fails to take him to school, write down what happened and when. Every time he does something improper, write it down.
If you go to court prepared it will help you immensely.

Answer 5

Get a lawyer. Depending on the state you live in, will determine your rights as a mother. Do NOT date anyone. Leave NO room for controversy in any situation you put yourself in. Do NOT drink alcohol, not even a little. Take care of your appearance and eat well. Make sure the children are clean, and in counseling if possible, check out your church for free counseling if possible. If you are not a member of an organized group or Church, GET PLUGGED in as soon as possible. These thing will show stability in your life, that is the main focus of any Judge. Be strict with your children's bed times, dinner times, hygiene and be very consistent with discipline. Keep a chart if you need to. Keep reciepts for everything! Do not Bash your husband in front of the kids or anyone else, just do what is right in the eyes of the law and God. You will be fine.

Answer 6

I live in Oklahoma and when I divorced my husband last year, I was told by my attorney, that 99.9% of the time in all states the mother is given custody UNLESS the father can prove her unfit... if you keep your kids fed, clean, clothed and in school, then honey, you should not worry too much, but yea, hire a lawyer and get to the court house ASAP!!!! and if he is cheating that will always look better on the non cheating spouse... good luck to you!!!

Answer 7

Yes you should get an attorney quickly, but for the most part if the children already live with you and he cannot prove you are unfit then the judge is more likely to leave the children in your home. However, if you think your husband is going to play dirty, get the best divorce and custody lawyer you can find.

Answer 8

You should talk to a lawyer, to make sure you've got everything in order. It's all routine for them, they'll know what to do.

I wouldn't hold the one time he had your son up late & didn't get him to school against him. If he hadn't been spending time with his son for a while, it's understandable that he would bend a few rules once he got a chance to be with him. Mom's in marriages *tend to* take on the parenting part of the partnership, just out of habit/tradition. Once divorced, you've got to give Dad a little time to work out his own routines (just like you did when baby was first born) and learn what's going to work for him & his child parenting-wise.

You didn't learn how to do it all at once -and- you had the advantage of society supporting you, telling you that you would be a good parent simply by virtue of your sex, to help you as you figured it all out. If Dad really wants to do this well & if you give him the same support, your son will be fine & get the advantage of great parenting no matter which parent he is with.

Answer 9

yeah you need a lawyer asap. try to work things out with ur husband before u result to that. maybe say you get partial custody for these days. bc having a laywer is expensive, messy and drawn out. i mean if ur reasonable about saying can we both agree to this... bed time at 8, dinner at 6, picked up at school, etc then you can resolve this without the courts. but no need to worry the courts always side with the mom, esp since he has been cheating hes not going to have a good case in the family court system.

Answer 10

Yes you do need to get a solicitor and when you do he will file for the custody of the children for you it is very un likely that you will loose the custody of the children as in most cases the court grants custody to the mother except in cases whear it can be proven that that the mother is unfit to rase the children when you go to see the solicitor tell him what happend when your husband had your son over night as you will have proof from the school by his attendance record also let him know if anything else happens as that will help you in your custody battle for your children try not to say anything about him in front of them as he is their dad and it can only hurt them to hear one parent running the other one down and they love both their mummy and daddy equaly don't stop your husband from seeing them as they need the both of you in their lives and after all you both love them TRY to remain on freindship baises for their sakes if not for your own as it makes it hard on the children when they feel that they have to take eighter mummy's side or daddies side which puts them in an aukward possition and will hurt them deaply I know it won't be easy as these sort of cases often can get quite messy and heated But for the children to feel secure and happy it must be done let them know that both you and their father still love them as much now as you ever did and that wil reasure them a lot

Answer 11

yes you need a lawyer, and what he pays in child support will be based on his income.....it isn't really up to you and remember it is for the kids and a lawyer can get you the best deal and your kids deserve that.

He doesn't sound like father of the year, it is a no brainer that you need to get custody, I did all the above, it isn't easy but it is possible. Be strong, don't fold.....I hope things work out well for you and your kids.....but stay away from thoughts of getting back with him, he isn't worth it.