how can i be assertive to my parents without hurting them?

Question

for the past year, i have been working my fingers to the bone, in order to save for my very own car. my parents keep borrowing money from me, a few times without even asking (my mom knows my bank account password). since the first time, ive lent about 1000, or more, dollars to them and i havent been able to get past 500 dollars in my savings, no matter how hard i try.

how do i tell them how im feeling without being too harsh?

im an independent person and i want to be mature, and responsible and own something that i worked hard for, but i feel like reaching my goal of owning my own car is downright impossible right now

i will be 19, i will be in my second year of college, my parents both work and make ok money, and i have a job.

if any of that matters.

Answer 1

Um, taking YOUR money without your consent or knowledge for that matter is not borrowing, it is STEALING.No matter if it's your mother or not. Change that password ASAP!! What a horrible way to treat you,Geez. Print out a record of all withdrawls made from your account since theyre all going to be from her I assume, since she is calling it "borrowing" from you, you have every right to expect the money back. Make her a copy of the printout & keep one for yourself, that way you have proof of her helping herself to your hard earned money when you request it back. I feel badly for you because my mom did the same thing to me; I wasnt able to get my own car until 3 years futher down the road, when I was married & moved out from her house. Yeah theyre your parents & have taken care of you up until this point, so you may not feel comfortable to throw a fit about this, but I think she's just taking advantage of you because she knows you arent going to stand up to her about it. Change that password girl, and Never let her know the new one! Good luck on getting that car

Answer 2

Number one- change your password. tell them that you work hard for that money and you want to save for something that you can call your own. they are wrong to just take your money like that. I've been in a similar situation. hopfully by changing your account password they will get the message

Answer 3

You don't say what grade you are in, whether your parents both work. If your Mom knows your bank account password, sounds like you are underage to have one of your own...

Talk to a school counselor for suggestions on your finances...Perhaps they could help you with some options.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Hide the money. Get a new account. This is not that hard of a problem.

Answer 5

Change your account password then just tell them you don't have any money they can borrow.