I am 42 years old and have two daughters age 19 and 17 from a first marriage. I just recently married my high school sweetheart and am very happy. However he is talking about having children or at least one child of our own. I am healthy active woman with no real heath problems but I think we are both to old to be think about having a baby. I also was excited that both my girls were off to college and I could now focus on me and not so much on my children. He really wants one of his own and a part of me wants to give him his wish but it is not really what I want. Heck if I got pregant tonite by the time that kid would be 20 I would be 53. I think we are too old what do you think?
2007-04-26 11:55:18 · 16 answers · asked by nancy g 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Trying to Conceive
Yep I can almost add I would be 63 when a child concived tonite would be 20.
2007-04-26 12:08:08 · update #1
yes you are too old.besides you dont really want to have a baby.you and your new man should enjoy your life together without more kids.you will have grandbabies soon enough and that is a wonderful experience to share.besides sweetie if you had another child now you would be 62 years old or 63 when he or she turns 20.dont do it.just be happy! good luck to you and your husband.
2007-04-26 12:04:44 · answer #1 · answered by dixie58 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are a few things in life that it's never a good time but we do it anyways. One is when to get married. The other is when to have children.
There is nothing to say you still cannot focus on yourself and have this child. It really doesn't matter what people think is "normal". Who's life is normal? Did you foresee the end of your first marriage? My point exactly.
Look, this is between you and the man you are in love with. Put in both your perspectives. Yes, when that kid is 20 you would be 53. But how old will he be. I'm sure he thought about this. It will be the two of you raising this child TOGETHER.
BTW, my intuition says you're leaning to have this child. But that's just me. You just want someone here to flat out say it's a stupid idea. Otherwise you wouldn't be here asking, right?
Good luck.
2007-04-26 19:04:45 · answer #2 · answered by ntoriano 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not too old at all. But you do need to be on the same page as your husband, don't have a baby just to make him happy, but if it will make you both happy, then go ahead and try. Get a full check-up and start taking pre-natals before trying to conceive. A lady I know just had her 4th baby at the age of 42, her husband is around 42 also. Good Luck and Congrats on your happy marriage!
2007-04-26 19:02:34 · answer #3 · answered by nimo22 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im fearing that I may not even have my first by the time I'm 40. I don't think you're ever too old to be a parent. If you have enough love in your heart, who cares how many years you have on your bones. BUT, don't do it just because HE wants one. Somehow, someway, it will get in the way of your relationship. Talk about it, tell him how you feel, and if you decide to go ahead, Good luck! Age is only a number.
2007-04-26 19:01:06 · answer #4 · answered by kwidit74 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think 42 is to old just like i dont think me being 13 when i got pregnant was to young i did and even graduated high school the only thing that i would say hold off is your feelings if you really just want to slow down with the kidos running around then i would try to express this maybe go on a vocation with him a thinking vocation lol maybe you guys can talk it over and maybe you might even change your mind im 19 now and 2 1/2 months pregnant and wasnt really all that thrilled but now im on the sure road of happiness im ex tactic but now that your girls are off to college you might just have a bit of empty nesting soon what ever you decide good luck but i dont think its to old it just means the baby will have even smarter and wiser parents good luck again i wish you the best on your direction
2007-04-26 19:11:11 · answer #5 · answered by jessnluv69 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's ultimately up to you, but if you do decide to go for it, check out Toni Weschlers book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" It'll help you determine when and if you're ovulating each cycle. You're chances of getting pregnant will be quicker than without charting. And if you're infertile, you charting can arm you with knowledge that could rule out painful and expensive fertility tests.... Goodluck, whatever you decide! And remember the statistics about down syndrome increases with age.
2007-04-26 18:59:59 · answer #6 · answered by Sakmeht 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this answer has nothing to do with your question... BUT... 42 plus 20 is 62.. how did you get 53?
2007-04-26 19:05:43 · answer #7 · answered by kali 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you are happy in your life then get a check up from your doctor and see what he thinks...no way are you to old...a lot of woman are doing it now.
I am 36 with a 14 and 12...lol
2007-04-26 19:00:05 · answer #8 · answered by ChelYox 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know someone in the same situation that has a 17 and a 15 year old and now has an 8 week old baby.
She seems happy enough. You know what your getting yourself in for.............
2007-04-26 21:10:20 · answer #9 · answered by Boo Boo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think 40 is to old to have baby's because so much could be wrong with the baby and it's a health factor to woman over 40
2007-04-26 19:03:42 · answer #10 · answered by K.C. H 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋