how to help myself? a transition required!?

Question

i had feelings for my bro in law. we both had a great chemistry feelings..bond etcetc. our relation was on a roller coaster . At times i felt i enjoy more with him than my spouse.
not proud of it ..but this has been on since 5years .he got married off late ,. today i dont feel that much for him.. but i have to stay around family also be aroundthe ultrasounds etc that my sis in law needs( she is preg)
bil& i fight..argue ..i dunno y .. but im tired .. really.
i haveto bearound all the time we live together..all of us..moving out is no -no till another fewyears(reasons)
now..i need help. tell me how to adopt an attitude of a nice person with a reserved unaanoying...for me?>

im very (was) v jouvial with the bil.. and im fun loving etc. but how to help myself?

ty to all of you who answered!

Answer 1

Well, you can just think of your husband as a roommate, maybe that will relieve the pressure your putting on yourself. If you adopt the attitude of a nice person, it will become work to continue to be that way, so I wouldn't recommend going that route.
Sounds like you need some alone time to sort things out, maybe take a weekend with some friends so you can think clearly, while out of the situation things may look different or you can figure the best route for you.
But make sure while doing this, start planning for the future, life without him. This will also help relieve that trapped feeling.
Good Luck.