About a year and a half ago my husband came home from work late, told me he wasnt in love with me anymore and wanted a divorce, I told him he wasnt trapped and he could leave if he wasnt happy. Then he got a bag of things and left. I was 8 months pregnant. He was gone for 4 months in which he had an affair.
I did not know about the affair and asked him to attend marriage counceling while his affair was going on. He did go with me but lied about being involved with anyone when our counceler asked him. I allowed him to move back in, the affair still unknown. Later I found cell phone records, he was still contacting her. We have since moved states, no more contact.
Despite my pain. I decided to give the marriage some time. I read stories that sometimes affairs made marriages stronger. But over one year later, I am very unhappy. Every time I need something from him for my recovery it is like pulling teeth. He says I am demanding and that he doesent want to argue.
2007-04-26 05:33:37 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As hard as it may be, I think you should consider moving on and letting him go completely. Until, you are ready to do that you won't begin to heal. You need to realized and know that you were not the one who failed him nor your marriage. He was the one who decided to cheat and betray you. You also shouldn't feel guilty if you do for the choices he made. Utilized the time and space you have to grow. In the long run, you will be better off.....Best of Luck**
2007-04-26 05:51:30 · answer #1 · answered by Yvette D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce him. He's being intentionally difficult with you.
One of my exes (back in '94) cheated on me throughout the entire relationship. When she was exposed, we were through. She then cheated on HIM a few months later!
I'm happy I found out. I had always wondered what would have happened if this happened after we had married and had children.
Now I'm married to a wonderful woman, and my ex is still playing musical boyfriends (according to her friends who occasionally email me). She'd better make up her mind, because she's now past 40, and a big rack will only go so far.
2007-04-26 05:44:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been divorced since 1998 and have never regretted it. The divorce was an answer to my prayers. I was mentally abused for a lot of years. I had it pretty rough for awhile and did have to struggle but doing much better now. I have now remarried and been married this time for 3 1/2 years. The only thing that was worth all the years of abuse were my children. I had to live for them. You need to get a divorce and get a life without the man that you are now married to. There are better men in this world and you can do better for yourself.
2007-04-26 06:02:45 · answer #3 · answered by Nancy M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No regrets about divorcing a cheater (actually he divorced me and is now marrying her). A cheater WILL cheat again. I should have known---- my ex had a number of affairs on his first wife. I thought I was different and made excuses for that behavior because his first wife had an alcohol problem . My ex cheated on me with someone who was at my engagement party and wedding---She is in the newspaper business as is my ex and in her column just today she was touting her engagement. She will learn. They are both morally bankrupt though so maybe they deserve each other. They are brazen enough to tell everyone that our marriage was over before they got involved. Would have been nice if someone told me that---- I was living with him, sleeping with him, hanging with him going out socially with him. I thought that we had a good marriage and that he was the perfect husband right up until he came to me and told me he was in love with another person and refused to go for counseling. Overnight I didn't even know who my husband was anymore. I lived in a demeaning situation for months where he treated me with no respect at all. My counselor and girlfriends all said that what he was doing was the worst in terms of behavior that they have ever seen or heard of. Trust me it was----they don't even know it all. His attitiude was basically I'm going to continue to call her and still live here---- deal with it. Finally I kicked him out of his own house (the house he had before we married since I gave up my condo when we got married) Ended up with the house in the divorce because no houses are selling and he was desperate to be with her. : ) They only fool themselves with their "stories" about the evolution of their relationship. Of course all of their colleagues at their respective newspapers know the truth and are appalled from what I hear. No Regrets, No Regrets No Regrets If I ever do it again I will go for a true nice guy-----not one whose nice guy front is a cover for his narcissism. Remember cheaters always throw it back at you to make you feel inadequate and responsible for their bad behavior. I'm relatively happy now. Sure it gets lonely sometimes but it's better being lonely and by yourself than being alone in a marriage. Seven months of hell until he moved out proved that to me.
2007-04-26 06:05:51 · answer #4 · answered by alphageek1dp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my ex cheated
i love being single!
2007-04-26 05:36:54 · answer #5 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋