Hello,
I am with my boyfriend for 5 years(living with him for 4 years). We had our ups and downs and sometimes I've asked myself if I was with the "right one", but I've always took the decision to stay with him.
My boyfriend, is caring, honest, mature, we have a great relationship, we communicate, respect and love each other.
He popped the question in december and I said yes, without hesitation.
But, now that the wedding is coming , I'm totally freaking out!! I am questionning myself every day, I look at other guys, I'm even dreaming about my ex-boyfriends!! I so want to take the right decision! Is it normal?
2007-04-26 04:19:12 · 15 answers · asked by marlisa 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is normal, because one thing your not questioning the love you have for each other. What you wrote about him and the way you to feel about each is refreshing from hearing how someone treats them terrible. Focus on your wedding and if you love him and want to be with him don't worry about your thoughts.
2007-04-26 04:24:31 · answer #1 · answered by Krinta 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal. I went through the same thing about a year and a half ago. I had been living with my boyfriend (now my husband) for about a year before we got married. If you are sharing everything already it's not much different - you just have a ring on your finger and you are legally married. I began to think about my exes and wonder whether I was ready to commit my life to one person. But I was already living with him, and I wasn't even interested in trying to date again, so why was I so hesitant? I came to the realization that it is a very major milestone in anyone's life and it shouldn't be taken lightly. If you weren't freaking out right now I'd say you WERE NOT ready to get married. Relax, take a day for yourself soon and get pampered, even if it's just a haircut and a manicure. You'll feel much better if you do.
Congratulations and all the best for the future!
2007-04-26 11:39:48 · answer #2 · answered by Pink1967 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's very normal it is called "cold feet" or "pre wedding jitters" It's nothing to worry about.
Dreaming about other men, looking at other men is completely normal as well...I have been married over a year now and occasionally i will look at another man, i have even dreamed about another man but it doesn't mean i don't love my husband any less, and it certainly doesn't mean i want another man...You cannot help what you dream...
If you know you love your fiance and you want to marry him then do it, if your absolutely sure he may not be the right one then postpone the wedding until you can figure things out...
good luck
2007-04-26 11:28:02 · answer #3 · answered by Kasja 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please leave or postpone your marriage. You have no idea how hard marriage is and if your feeling like this now your going to get divorced. It's normal to feel a little nervous about something that's going to change your life but the fears and thoughts if this big now will grow to be huge once your married. If you don't listen to me then listen to your gut. Think about this seriously it's a lot harder to leave when your married. It's harder to tell people and if you have kids you will always be linked to this man. If you really believe in your heart of hearts that you love him and that you want to marry him but have doubts why don't you just postpone it for another year or two? Go to counseling. Don't just dismiss your feelings because you rather not feel these things. They will comeback up later on. Good luck.
2007-04-26 11:35:27 · answer #4 · answered by nm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cold feet are pretty common. You need to ask yourself whether your life is better with him or without him. It sounds like you have a great, loving relationship. Don't let go of him unless you feel like there's a really good reason for it, and if you're still together after 5 years, you must have thought he was worth it.
2007-04-26 12:28:05 · answer #5 · answered by cross-stitch kelly 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like ya got cold feet which is normal. I didn't have cold feet. I just got sick (literally). Make a list and give all the good qualities and bad qualities. The positive points of marriage and the negative. I got married at 20. We've been together 10+ yrs. My sis has been with her beau 14 yrs and refuses to "take the plunge". You gotta follow your heart !!!
2007-04-26 11:37:02 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is a heavy commitment to take
try to relax cos the end result is always a good decision
to have a life partner to face the horrible world together
2007-04-26 11:29:01 · answer #7 · answered by kimht 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tread careful. Do not get pushed into it by family/freinds. Cold feet is normal. No one can tell you yes/no except yourself.
2007-04-26 11:35:47 · answer #8 · answered by MATT B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are just nervous, if you have been with him that long and lived with him you know him well then he is the right one. Calm day once the day gets here it will be a piece of cake
2007-04-26 11:25:39 · answer #9 · answered by Eyes of Green 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is very normal. It will go away after your married, you will be thinking how silly it was.
2007-04-26 11:25:22 · answer #10 · answered by Patricia G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋