How can I ever get over being called stupid by my father? He called me stupid and I know he was just projecting his insecurities about his own intelligence, and several people have told me that I AM intelligent, but....I still feel that people will call me stupid. It takes a lot of guts for me to even post a question or answer here because I'm afraid some thoughtless jerk will tell me how dumb I am. It's already happened today, which brings me to where I am now. I feel like living like this is no life to live, and I wish I could die.
2007-04-25 19:36:56 · 16 answers · asked by ? 6 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Know that you are NOT any dumber than the rest of us....as a matter of fact, you are probably brighter than most. Simply questioning your insecurities shows that.
It's time you get over the insecurity and take responsibility for the way you think and feel. You know that you are not stupid, now move on. Set your goals in life, and go get what you want. Accept responsibility for your success' and learn from your failures. Someone much brighter than me once said that if you haven't failed at something, you haven't tried anything.
Build your life, its fun when you realize that you have complete control over your own destiny.
And, I hate to be the one to tell you this...but we are ALL stupid sometimes, specially those of us who try new things...but then, that's what makes life worth living. If I always made the correct decisions in my life, it wouldn't be much fun.
Smile baby, something dumb is gonna happen and set your plans back today. You're gonna have to fix that and move on towards your goals.
How could ANYONE wish they were dead?? That's waaay to easy, and not much fun, I hear. If ya need someone to talk to Im on yahoo i8thr2 but usually invisible.
2007-04-25 19:53:21 · answer #1 · answered by i8thr2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you are too sensitive. So your father called you Stupid, there are other worse things he could have called you. Frankly speaking, the fact that someone calls you stupid does not mean you are. Only we allow ourselves to feel that way. Stop taking it so personally and just think how lucky and better off you are compared to others who have to withstand continuous verbal abuse, worse than the one you mention. Forgive your father and that will help you deal with the anger and the pain. And pay no attention to answers by dumb jerks, that is the price we pay for posting questions, after all it is a free forum and everyone pretty much answers any way they please. If you find an answer too offensive, you can report them and give them a bad rating.
Your life is too valuable to waste on petty thoughts and petty actions. Dying is not the remedy. When you can, talk to your father and tell him that although he is entitled to an opinion, you find his offensive, and that you are definitely not stupid, why? because you are his child and his reflection.
Good luck
2007-04-25 19:52:03 · answer #2 · answered by Karan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well lets see...I've been called stupid by my sister, a high school teacher, my supervisor at my first job, the owner of the business at my second job, a customer at my second job... and the number of people who said it to me in a more round about way... countless. The effects are lasting. I dont think they ever go away.
I know I'm stupid. (NOT SAYING YOU ARE) And all my life I've felt useless. Untill Last June. That's when I decided I was gonna do things that make me feel good about myself. I helped fix up my inlaws house. I watch a baby for free. I watch my niece for free. I give a little girl a ride to preschool because her mom doesn't have a car. Last week I helped supply food to a "celebration of life" gathering of a 32 year who died in a car wreck. Good thing too because only 2 other people thought ahead and brought food. The poor family had enough on their mind, They didn't need that added weight. My point to this is that you have a purpose in life. If you haven't figured out what your purpose is yet, make a purpose. Let you be happy with you.
2007-04-25 19:56:44 · answer #3 · answered by Just Jane 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah that word seems to pop out a lot from peoples mouth.Plus sometimes they say it because they want to say it, or sometimes they want to make people feel like they know everything by calling you that way. Girl you are intelligent, live, forgive and forget, yeah may sound easy, but if you don't try then what to expect.You need to live so you can help others maybe in the same situation. Good Luck.
2007-04-25 19:50:48 · answer #4 · answered by ivette 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not dumb. Merely frustrated with Your situation. If You know all these things about Your feelings, and the motivations of others, and can reason Your way through them to a logical conclusion, why then would You require My (Our) input. Are You seeking justification for Your actions, reinforcement for Your beliefs, or permission to more on to the next stage in Your life. I take it that You are a sentient rational human, with all the usual failings of Our species. But do You posses Humanity's greatest gift, the one thing that raises Us above the animals? Hope, and a positive outlook towards the future.
So there You have it . You are not as dumb as You have been lead to believe. Now get on with the rest of Your life.
2007-04-25 19:50:56 · answer #5 · answered by Ashleigh 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The point of living is to prove everyone, especially your dad, wrong. If you think you are stupid, just go on believing it, and make your life miserable. If not, crawl out of that hole and live your life the best way you can. My ex used to call me stupid, useless, and anything else you can come up with. Since I left him, my life has improved so much, and I'm doing better in every possible way then when I was with him. I'm not stupid, and neither are you. When you realize it, others will as well
2007-04-25 19:47:42 · answer #6 · answered by sharkgirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What's the point of trying to live life when you've been emotionally abused?
You live your life, because you want to live it... nothing else...
you might be wondering why is that so...
There are forms of abuses... physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, social... You just had only one...
let us say it is a rape victim... she was abused physically, mentally and emotionally... physically penetrated by someone she doesn't want to... mentally trying to erase it from their memory, but can't... emotionally she shuts down because of the abuse and she will have a very hard time to regain full control of her being... it will be hard to process and answer the question "why?" it will scar her for a lifetime...
let us say your have an impossible boss... you are abused mentally, emotionally and socially... mentally he eats eveything you have to get the deadlines and other needs not necessary for the work, emotionally you are stressed and cannot find the time to do the right things, socially abusing you by barking at you and telling you what a dumb a** you are...
now, let me see... you just do not like to hear those things from people you are supposed to trust right? you do not want to hear that from people you have been with for most of your life... these are the people who are supposed to be the ones who will appreciate you everytime and not bring you down...
Well, I have news for you... they are just humans like you and me... you have to remember, they are in a state that is not equal to yours, they judge things based on their past, they didn't know any better, we are more informed now... we have a lot of things they never had access to... they were given different choices in their life... we are more liberated to choose, because we know more... think of that... and you might see that you just forgive them and love them... that is the only thing you can do... accept them... give your best to them... they will change gradually... impossible? you make it happen, not the other way around... it is YOU!!! your responsibility and you choice...
Good luck my dear friend...;-)
2007-04-25 20:55:38 · answer #7 · answered by DEADPOOL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question! I'm glad you asked instead of acted upon your thoughts which by the way are permanent solutions to a temporary problem...please stay with us!
Sometimes we have to give in to the saying that "WE HAVE NO CONTROL OVER OTHER PEOPLES ACTIONS ONLY TO OUR REACTIONS TO OTHER PEOPLES ACTIONS!" this is soooo true! We can let things/words (which as you said yourself are usually projections of insecurities) get to us or we can let go and "LET GOD" ! If you simply ride it out you will see a lot better view of your surroundings and probably help some others along the way which always leaves me with such a great feeling!
Hang in there!
2007-04-25 19:47:36 · answer #8 · answered by wantu2luvme 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You probably will never completely get over your emotional abuse, but you will learn how to deal with it. You are already learning to deal with it because of what you said about your father. Give yourself a pat on the back. You deserve it. As you grow older, you will gain even more insights to your fathers abuse. There are a lot of thoughtless jerks on this site. I am glad you are not one of them. You are better than they are.
2007-04-25 19:48:17 · answer #9 · answered by starflower 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well nobody should bring u down specially ur father..hey hey he might be ur dad and all but that gives him no right to call u that my dad is sometimes like that he calls me fat and sometimes i feel like if he means it which probably he does but if u die ur just going to make him life like he wants it don't let that "person" win over u
2007-04-25 19:50:17 · answer #10 · answered by Charlotte 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋