a Mothers Day gift for my 93 yr. old mother who doesn't need or want anything except to die.?

Question

My Mother is in very ill health and we don't even know if she will still be here Mother's Day. However, we plan a get together and I have no idea what to get her. She shows no inerest in anything.

Answer 1

Hello, My mother died almost 2 years ago..may 16th will be 2 years. All you can do is love her spend every moment you can with her, She will get tired of you saying you love her and my even get mad. But remember you wont be able to tell her no more when shes gone. I watched my mom take her very last breath and right before she was going I told her I loved her and ask god to take her so she wont hurt anymore. but she knew she was loved right to the very end. So my answer to you is the gift of love!! Nothing else will do!! And tell her to say hi to my mom priscilla when she gets to wheres shes going and tell her I love and miss my best friend dearly!!!

Answer 2

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Answer 3

Buy her a nice night gown, or a robe. Most older people are cold as their blood does not circulate well, so take that into consideration

Then do get together as you planned. Even though she is ill she will really appreciate it, and for a couple of hours she will not think of wanting to die.

Another suggestion is that a family member should take time out to visit her every single day. Even if it is for a half hour a day. You should all take turns. Those times that she has company she will not think about dying. We did it in our family. My mother was also 93. I have a sister and brother who lived an hour away, and they also participated.

We made a planned list for each week. Sometimes it was a child, or a grandchild, a niece or nephew.

I know when my mother was alive, I used to go to her every Sunday, and stay with her for a couple of hours. I would play music that I knew she enjoyed, and say prayers with her as she was a very religious women and always said her prayers.. She really did not know who I was, but one Sunday she said. "I like you". Some times I would even see her tap her feet to the rhythm of the music.

My son once told me. It is so easy to speak to grandma, as you don't have to think of anything new to say, as she forgets the second she finished answering you. Then you can repeat the story or the question over, and over. Of course it was just a joke.

Answer 4

Here's something creative that will be appreciated and you will have fun doing:

Make up a crossword puzzle and have all the hints be personal inside moments and jokes that only you two would know about. Put it on a poster board and add some clipart and some pictures to it!

The crossword puzzle could be time consuming and a bit frustrating ... you could do the same idea with a WORDSEARCH or WORDFIND puzzle.

Put your computer skills to work! Use Excel, get clipart from Yahoo Images Search, copy them, and reformat them, use a gluestick to put on posterboard.

Use graph paper, and pictures from magazines if you are not as good on the computer, and it will give it a homemade feeling.

This is a really beautiful poem too!
Women have strengths that amaze us.
They carry children, they carry hardships, they carry burdens but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up for injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without new shoes so their children can have them.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a new marriage. Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They have sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all sizes, in all colors and shapes.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world spin!
Women do more than just give birth.
They bring joy and hope.
They give compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have a lot to say and a lot to give.



http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/wome...

Answer 5

I had a similar experience with my grandmother; she was 94 when she passed away.
Material possessions are probably inappropriate, because as you said, she shows no interest in the things around her. On a practical note, it's just going to collect dust until the time comes and it'll be just another "thing" to deal with when you have to clean out her home etc.
That said...I like the idea of just having as many family members as possible gather with her, and have her tell stories (if she feels up to it) or simply tell her, in personal ways, what she means to each member of her family and what she's taught them etc. At least she can go out feeling at peace and surrounded by love.
Another thing you could do is pool together and make a charitable donation in her honor. Is there anything she believed in/was passionate about before she fell ill? i.e. children, the outdoors, pets, etc.? Did she lose a beloved family member to a disease? Is she suffering with a specific disease right now? there are tonnes of charities that deal with various causes; it shouldn't be difficult to find one that might mean something to her. She could feel like she'll be leaving something valuable behind by helping others. It might also show her that she has taught her family to be kind, compassionate and generous.
I hope I have helped. I also hope she makes it to mother's day and is as comfortable as possible. however, sometimes you just need to let them go. Is it possible for the family to get together asap? best of luck.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

Not mentioning the words "you want to die"?

I know that in adolescents, depression is accompanied by low blood flow in the frontal part of the brain. It's normally about 15% above the areas around it. In adolescent depression, it's about 5% give or take 7%. I read a study that shows that blood flow is affected by autogenic training, both during and after the training. Autogenic means self-originated. It basically means using yourself as your hypnotist instead of other people or societal pressures in general. I think that hypnosis also results in changes in blood flow too. You can't hypnotise anybody else. You can only hypnotise yourself.

I recommend prayer. Definitely no stress about trying to reach expectations. Whatever interests you will probably interest her.

I've done a few years of aged care. You need to take things at a slow pace and just making a cup of tea and arranging things around the place would help, I think.

Answer 8

Here are some great Mothers Day gift ideas:

1) Here are some designer flowers, even though us moms say don't get us anything, flowers will liven us up. Here are some unique type of arrangements you don't see everyday. http://shopping.yahoo.com/b:Designer%20Florals:784716779

2) Or how about a a special plant, see here: http://shopping.yahoo.com/b:Flowers%20%26%20Plants%20for%20Mom:784716800

3) A great gift is a digital picture frame. Upload any photos you think she'd love. I'm sure her heart will melt. They come in different colors too: http://shopping.yahoo.com/b:Electronic%20Gifts%20for%20Mom:784716805

You can find more unique Mother's Days gifts at Yahoo! Shopping’s Valentine’s

Gift Center: http://shopping.yahoo.com/b:Mother%27s%20Day%20Gifts%20%26%20Gift%20Ideas:784716694

Hope this helps!

Answer 9

I'm sure she has some interests. But it really depends on how much she can currently do. Would she want a material possession? Can she Speak? Can she Read/Write?

You could bring yourself and just ask her to tell stories to you, she might have tails you don't know about, tails of love or romance. Most "Older" People like telling there stories.

Give me some more information on what she can do and I'll try to come up with something.

Answer 10

I lost my mother eleven years ago today. You don't need to get her anything. Just be there with her and let her know you love her. Matter of fact, why wait for Mothers Day? Start now, and do it every day for as long as you have her. It will make her happy and give you future peace.