LONG STORY SHORT I'M IN LOVE WITH THIS GUY AND HAVE BEEN FOR 12 YRS..I'M 24 NOW. HES 29.WE HAVE NEVER BEEN IN A RELATIONSHIP ONLY SEXUAL.HE SAYS HE CARES A LOT ABOUT ME AND SAYS HE LOVES ME IN SOME WAYS AS WELL. HE SAYS TO ME I'M THAT GIRL, THE GIRL IN THE MOVIES AND IN THE SONGS. THE IT YOU LOOK FOR YOUR WHOLE LIFE.. I'M THAT. YET HES SCARED TO BE WITH ME IN FEAR OF MESSING IT ALL UP...HES GOT A LOT OF ISSUES RIGHT NOW HES HAVING TO DEAL WITH. AND HE TELLS ME HE WOULD LIKE TO THINK THAT WHEN HE REACHES THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN ..I WILL BE THERE...HERES MY QUESTION....WE ARE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP YET HE DID JUST SLEEP WITH SOMEONE ELSE AND IT HURT ME SO BAD...I AM FAITHFUL TO HIM EVEN THOUGH IM NOT WITH HIM. DO I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE MAD AT HIM? PLUS HE SLEPT WITH THE MOST NASTYEST PERSON I KNOW AND SHES 41 AND NOW PREG BY 1-5 AND HES IN THE LIST.HES PAYING FOR THE ABORTION..AM I CHASING A DREAM? IM SO LOST AND SO HURT....WHAT DO I DO..
2007-04-25 12:15:53 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You can be mad, but as you said you're not in a relationship with him, so he owes you no loyalty. Yes, I would say you are chasing a dream. Now wake up and start living your real life. You are young with your whole future ahead of you. Don't waste it waiting on something that may never happen with a person that obviously has no moral values and will keep you stung along as long as you let him. If he was really in love with you, and he really thought you were the one or you were "it" he would be with you and not paying for an abortion. He sounds like a player and he's playing you bad.
2007-04-25 12:26:58 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay, for starters, if you've been involved with him for 12 years, and he's still not ready to commit, he never will be. Some people are just not wired to be in monogomous relationships. There is nothing wrong with that. You need to ask yourself what you really want from him. It sounds like he really cares for you, but is afraid of committment. Maybe you two could try an open relationship- swingers. A lot of people try this and love it. Good luck!
2007-04-25 12:25:57 · answer #2 · answered by sunkissed4900 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, you have been together for 12 years yet he is still not ready to be with you and ONLY you? You have a right to be mad at him because he is playing with your heart. Im sorry but someone has to say it look at the facts. Men that really love their woman don't screw around on them because ''they're not ready for marriage'' That is not love. And it's not like you have to be married in order to be faithful to the person you love. In my opinion i think you should just leave him behind and move on you waited this long and besides sex what did you get out of this ''relationship''? Ask yourself that then the decision is yours to make on what you want to do. GL.
2007-04-25 12:40:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes be mad...why should he committ? He is already getting the benifits of a relationship without really having a relationship.... Dump the bum. BTW, I am available and would never take you for granted.
2007-04-25 12:48:31 · answer #4 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your what I refer to ( so does he) as a booty call, FWB, friends with benefits. This might be hard to take, but...he's done nothing but lie to you. You mean no more to him then that baby hes having aborted. He's used and abused you and its time you moved on and found someone that would trully appreciate you!
2007-04-25 12:27:27 · answer #5 · answered by tnf0920 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry that you are hurting :(
It kind of sounds to me like you are mad at yourself, but you would feel better if you had the right to be mad at him. I think you know in your heart the answer to this question...
2007-04-25 12:38:10 · answer #6 · answered by withrow_ag 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well you have the right to be mad.you put your heart into this guy and then he sleeps with someone else.to be honest with you i think you should find someone who really wants to be committed with you,because if you were that girl in the movies and songs he would've never did that.
2007-04-25 12:25:15 · answer #7 · answered by bunnyfoofoo93 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you have a right to be mad. Tell him it is now or never for a relationship.
2007-04-25 12:27:38 · answer #8 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋