Is it considered physical abuse when a man grabs a woman by her throat and pushes her to the wall --- if it's only "to get her attention"? Is it physical abuse if he throws her on the bed and sits on top of her to make her talk to him? Is tapping the phone "because we should have no secrets" a form of mental abuse? I think all of the above is true but he doesn't!!!! Please help settle this argument!
2007-04-25 10:29:54 · 23 answers · asked by candy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
any type of verbal confrontation or physical touchness out of anger is abuse.
I was married to a very abusive man for 6 years. Here is a list below what i see as abuse.
Mental abuse
1. tells you what you can and cannot do
2. controls who your friends are.
3. controls your wardrobe
4. wants an explanation if where you were every second of the day
5. tell you you are worthless and no one else would have you and tells you he loves you in the same sentence
6.tries to make you believe stuff even though you know it is not true.
7. and there are many more.
Physical abuse.
Touching you out of anger or touching you when it makes you feel uncomfortable is a sign of physical abuse, speaking from my own experience women do not stay cause they love him they stay with their abusers cause they Fear them, they will make up excuses for him, lie to you, tell you them bruises came from a fall. I left my Husband in the middle of the night in my pajamas and grabbed my son in his pajamas we left with just that, drove my car to a nearby store and contacted police, my husband put cigarettes out on me, put small cut marks on me and if he told me the sky was not blue even though it was, i would believe him cause i feard to disagree with him. anytime a person forces you to do something you do not want it is a form of abuse, if this is you that you are talking about get out now get a restraining order or protective order or pack up and leave the state you are in and never look back. We never get over what we go through in a abusive relationship but we learn to cope and we become stronger and we never let our guard down again.
2007-04-25 10:47:41 · answer #1 · answered by Sparky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already know the truth. And having an argument about it isn't good enough. Go to a local Women's Shelter and get information and pamphlets on the definition of abuse - and get out as soon as you can. It's abusive on all levels - physical, emotional, and mental, and it sounds like you could be in a lot of danger if you stay where you are! That doesn't mean that you have to abandon the relationship altogether if you think there is something worth sticking it out for, but get out for now and seek help in the way of counselling for him and you and counselling for him by himself (anger management?). As long as he has no boundaries and thinks you'll take it, he will not stop simply by answering an argument on Yahoo Answers.
Good for you for recognizing that something is not right - now do something about it! Good luck sweetie!
2007-04-25 10:38:33 · answer #2 · answered by Shannon H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already know the truth. When you doubt yourself on these matters, take a step back and ask yourself....if this was happening to somebody else, would I consider it abuse?
Of course this is abuse! Oh....and one more thing. It doesn't surprise me that he doesn't think it is. Most abuser, don't really consider what they're doing as abuse, and they also won't take responsibility for their actions. It's always "someone else" "making" them do whatever they do.
My advice is GET OUT....while the gettin's good. You cannot change an abuser, and the longer you stay, the worse it will get, and the more he'll be in denial.
2007-04-25 10:36:28 · answer #3 · answered by a_lot_smarter_now 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What's their to settle you already answered your own question. But if you need to hear someone else say it Hell Yes it's abuse and it's just a matter of time before it escalates. He is controlling you and what do you think is going to happen when he feels like he's losing the control? That's when it because a bigger problem.
2007-04-25 10:34:13 · answer #4 · answered by KH 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh yes it is abuse. No one should use any type of physical control to threaten or dictate to another person how to react, to get their attention or to make them listen. As for the phone thing, it's obvious he has MAJOR control issues and guys who have that, are very jealous.
Two cents worth of advice that is worth a lot more ... get away from him, NOW ... it will only get worse and worse and worse.
2007-04-25 10:33:56 · answer #5 · answered by John B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes-Yes...it is abuse. Physical and mental. If it has happened to you then I would consider getting some help before it escalates.
2007-04-25 13:33:21 · answer #6 · answered by susie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of the above mention is abuse. Get out now and good luck.
2007-04-25 10:32:22 · answer #7 · answered by Jewells 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All are abuse, no matter who tells you what, and very bad abuse at that. ! If you are in a realtionship with these kinds of actions, you better RUN now, it will only get worse with time.
2007-04-25 10:34:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of the above is abuse. My exhusband did the same thing to me and then some and he went to jail. If you don't get away from him now it will only get worse. There is no excuse for his behavior.
2007-04-25 10:37:21 · answer #9 · answered by jen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes that is all considered abusive. Or at least in my opinion it is. A relationship shouldn't be like that at all!
2007-04-25 10:33:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋