Hey im 16 and my bf is 19. its just a 3 yr difference. He told me he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and I'm sure I want to be with him too. He is a national guard in the army. What do ya'll think about this? Please dont tell me that I'm to yeong or he is to old for me. I know what I want and I'm ready for this. I'm really mature about this stuff. so can you help me and give me suggestions please. I live with my parents in Ga but he wants me to go live with him in San Diego Cali.I would like to go except I dont think my parents would like the idea of me going all tha way to California though.I want to he is the sweetest and most romantic guy ever. We are in love and we want to be together. I know i'm not the only one getting married so yeong. there is a lot of teens doing it cuz their in love. I am sure that we will be together the rest of our lives. We want to be together and live in a nice apartment or house and have a baby one day. Can you give me any suggestions please?
2007-04-25 07:47:43 · 28 answers · asked by doncella c 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know you said that you don't want to be told that you're too young but it is way too early in my opinion for marriage. That is a huge step. How long have you known him? Have you even finished high school yet? You need to discover yourself and finish high school. Go to college. Get a good career and have something to fall back on because no matter how nice this man is, and I'm sure he is, there's always that "what if". What if things dont work out after 2 -3 years and you have to move back with your parents. Enjoy your teenage years while you still can. There's plenty of time for marriage.
2007-04-25 07:58:24 · answer #1 · answered by #1 Monkey Minion 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is a big responsiblity. It is not all fun and games and should not be taken lightly. First off how do you plan on paying for your house? Baby? Bills in general. Since you are only 16 you will probably want to finish high school first and it is not easy to work a part time job, school and a husband. And with working a part-time job you will not make very much money which will put a strain on your marriage. Ok so I sound like I am lechuring you now. Sorry!! My advice is to just wait a while and see how every thing goes. Since you two are so in love with each other than things will work out for you and there is not a need to rush into marriage. You are young and you might be mature but if you are mature than you will see that if you wait until you at least graduate high school that it will not be the end of the world. It is not easy or fun to have a long distance relationship but if you trully love each other as much as you say you do than time will not get in the way for you both. And once you get married than you will be older, be able to have full time jobs, pay for the stuff that you want. Good luck!!
2007-04-25 08:05:22 · answer #2 · answered by butterfly_2blue 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Youre ready? You mean you have a job a car a place of your own and can do whatever you want because you totally support yourself?I bet your parents are still taking care of you.I know a lot of teens marry and almost all of them divorce.What will you do in san diego when your b/f is sent to iraq or some other part of the world for 2-4 yrs and you cant go?Have you ever worked and supported yourself?What if you have kids and he is killed? Sure you might get some money from the government but who will help you raise those kids?Do you REALLY think you know as much NOW as you will when you are 25?I know it all seems so romantic and everything, but the truth is you are NOT ready for the RESPONSIBILITIES of marriage, just the honeymoon.Now stay in school, get an eduaction if he really loves you then you can get married once he is OUT of the gaurds.You dont know how lonely women get whose husbands go off to war and how many men and women cheat on one another because of this situation they place thierselves in.Use your head not your heart and listen to your parents.Having a bab y isnt like having a puppy.Once it can eat solid food you tie it up in the backyard and feed it once a day.A baby need attention 24-7.You arent ready for that because you cant support it if something happens to him.
2007-04-25 08:11:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're so ready why are looking for suggestions here? You already know it's not a great idea or you wouldn't be asking here.
What about your parents?Do you have their permission?You need that you know before you can get married.At 16 you truly have no idea of what you want.
Nothing in life is for sure let alone staying married forever.No one can make a promise like that and be sure it will come true.
What if you move to Cali.and things go wrong between you?Your parents will be in Ga. and you'll be all alone.And what if he gets sent somewhere else?Are you prepared for all this?
There's no way at 16 that you're ready for all this no matter what you say.Marriage is a huge responsibility.Not all fun and games.Sweet and romantic are just small things.They don't make a man.Responsibility,respect,honesty and caring are among the many things you should look for.
Right now you should concentrate on getting a good education and making something of yourself so you have a good future.Enjoy your life and be carefree as a child should be.There's lots of time for marriage and babies later on after you've established yourself.
Good Luck.
2007-04-25 08:08:39 · answer #4 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I got married very young, to a military man, and totally thought I was ready and I totally wasn't.
Being married young is hard. You have a lot of maturing to do and it's stressful on a marriage.
Being a military wife is hard. It seems like it would be all romantic but it's really lonely and difficult especially so far from home.
And finally:
Living in San Diego is hard. It's where I'm from and the cost of living is one of the highest in the country.I'm talking $900 to $1200 or more for a one or two bedroom place. And don't think you'll just live on base 'cause military housing is almost impossible to get into there. The financial stress alone could kill your marriage.
Wait a while hon. Do it for him if you won't do it for yourself. Don't put the burden of a young wife on this young man.
2007-04-25 08:01:00 · answer #5 · answered by nailgal2005 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Lets see...your really mature....but worried about whether your parents would be OK with it. Look you may think you know you want, but from life experience I can tell you that what you want when you are 30 is diff than what you want at 20, what you want at 40 is diff than 30, and so on. Think about it, do you think your parents were exactly the way they are when they were 16 yrs old? I can promise they were not. Youve got your whole life ahead of you why would you want to decide the rest of it so soon. If this is meant to be......it will still be there in a few yrs
2007-04-25 07:57:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
What music, movies, things do you like now? Did you like them all when you were 13? But it was only 3 years ago!
Life moves pretty fast when you're young, and odds are you won't feel the same way about anyone when you're 19, do you want to be married to some guy you thought was hot 3 years ago?
If you runaway (because you're under 18) to live with this guy in San Diego and he gets deployed he'll be off fighting for more than a year and you'll be all alone. You don't want to be alone, do you?
2007-04-25 07:56:24 · answer #7 · answered by Amy 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have a suggestion....wait until you are old enough and mature enough to make a decision this big. As we get older, our feelings change and some things we may have liked as children aren't as appealing to us when we're adults.You are 16 years old. Being a wife and mother should be the last thing on your mind. You should be getting excited about the prom and graduation and going to college. You should be hanging out with your girlfriends and going to sleepovers. I don't think marrying this young is going to benefit you in any way and if you really loved each other, you wouldn't mind waiting until you were at least 18years old.
2007-04-25 08:01:45 · answer #8 · answered by Shelly E 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why? even if it truly is a superb idea in the present day it will be a superb idea in 2 years at the same time as the 16 3 hundred and sixty 5 days previous is legally an human being! Why rush it? Scared the 16 3 hundred and sixty 5 days previous receives smart in 2 years?
2016-10-18 03:45:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The advice I would give to you is LIVE first! Your still a very young girl and you do not understand what exactly marriage is yet. Marriage is not a easy road to go down. It takes alot of work from both of you. Yes I probably sound like a nagging mother but its the best for you! just date the guy for about 5 more years or so and see what happens. i will be shocked if your still together!
2007-04-25 07:53:37 · answer #10 · answered by Mellycat123 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋