My friend is pregnant and i found out she is doing drugs....?

Question

She has been a real good friend of mine since 8th grade and now we are in 10th grade. she's fifteen and pregnant with a 20 year olds baby. i also found out by my best friend that she is doing cocaine, crystal meth, and crack. she claims to love it and the feeling it gives her. but she is also on probation!! what should i do??? i can't let her have a baby that will have a huge chance of having some kind of medical problem. i am really disappointed and confused!! please help me!!

Answer 1

WOW!! That is a LOT for you to take on by yourself!!

First, realize that even though you care about your friend and want to help her that she is spiraling down a path that you not only DONT want to follow, but also dont understand! From the FIRST time someone uses drugs like meth, a chemical in thier brain changes causing them to become "instantly" addicted. She does NOT have control over the urges or the desire to continue to take these drugs. She also is not in her "right mind" and cant even convince herself to stop for the sake of the baby! It really is VERY sad and I am sorry that you are having to watch someone that you care about doing this to themselves.

I guess the question that I have is, Do her parents KNOW that she is pregnant?! If they dont then the first thing you have to do is go to her parents. You MUST be the "dreaded NARK" on this if you want to not only save your friend, but also her unborn child! You need to find a time when your friend is not home, go to her parents and tell them EVERYTHING that you know about her pregnancy, her drug abuse AND her boyfriend. They may not choose to believe you and they may get mad at you and kick you out. BUT you will KNOW in your heart that you have done what is right and if nothing else it will FORCE her parents to at least look at thier daughter and maybe begin to see what she is doing!

Unfortunately in doing what you MUST do, you are probably going to LOSE a friend... but keep in mind that you are doing what you have to do out of LOVE and that MAYBE one day she will see that and understand that. Chances are, however, that she wont.

Whatever happens just keep telling yourself that you are doing what is necessary and you are doing it all out of love and concern! Also DO NOT carry this burden alone. Realize that your friend made these decisions for herself and there is nothing that you could have done or said that wouldve made her choose differantly. THIS IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM! I know that it may break your heart and hurt a LOT but SHE is the one who is putting you in this situation, not the other way around!!

Take care and KNOW that you are a good, kind hearted, loving person who is trying to do what is right!! You'll be in my prayers!!

Answer 2

Report it to the authorities. There's nothing you can do on your own, you won't be able to talk her out of it, and she obviously doesn't care about what it's doing to her baby. If she's on probabtion, she's obviously gotten into trouble before, and the best thing you can do for her and her unborn baby, are to report her to the local law enforcement. She'll be forced to take a drug test, and the results will take care of the rest.....I'm sure you don't want your friend going to jail, but the drugs she may be using are going to do worse things for her than jail ever will, and her baby may never have a chance at a normal life if something isn't done right NOW!

FYI: Unless a doctor believes his client is taking drugs, or is a minor and the minor's parents request it, they do NOT test for drugs in their client's systems. Also, in most cases child protective services will do (can do by law) NOTHING for the baby until after it is born, so that is not an option, although there are many of us who wish it were. Teachers & school counselors are also a good way to go, as they are MANDATED REPORTERS and by law have to report anything like this, however, the best place to go is the local police or this friends' probation officer. You can do so semi-anonymously, however, they will still need to take down your name & contact information for if it ever goes to court. Sad to say, but this person doesn't sound like she's much of a friend anymore. Hopefully she'll get cleaned up and thank you later in life. If not, just know that YOU did the right thing.

Answer 3

You are believing a story you heard from someone else, not admissible in court therefore not to be believed. If you are so concerned, ask your friend about what you heard. See what she says, tell her you are concerned about her health and the health of the baby. Don't tell her who told you that would only cause more problems for YOU. If she denies that she is using drugs, look at the evidence, is she withdrawn from friends? Does she stay up all night and look like it in the morning? Are her eyes red and dialated? Does she eat? Is she losing weight instead of gaining like she should be in pregnancy? Weigh all the evidence before you believe hearsay from someone else. If it's true, call her parents, talk to someone you can trust like a teacher or minister who can then take the appropriate action or intervention.

Answer 4

WOW Im so sorry to hear that! Have you tried talking to her? Maybe she nees an intervention? please dont tell me the loser bf is doing drugs with her or supplying her with the drugs or has he left the picture. There is something a lot deeper going on with your friend as to why she is doing drugs. First off does she even want the baby? I dont think she does by the way she is using all of those drugs. Maybe you can try to talk her into seeking help for her addiction? Maybe you could discreetly talk to a school counselor and they can give you some resources where you can get your friend some help. To me it sounds like she doesnt have decent parents or they would notice or do something. Oh yeah satutory rape he could go to jail and your friend would be in serious trouble but at least she would get some help.

Answer 5

I feel horrible for you, but if this is mainly for the baby. I would talk to her. Then, you need to talk to her to try to convince her to stop. Tell her that she's not only messing up her life, but also her child's life. If she doesn't listen, tell her this. If you watch the news, it showed that they found a child on meth. The mother made it and sold it or something like that, and now she's more than likely going to jail. Also, doctors may notice a slight prooblem with the baby, and she's be arrested and never get to see her child again. If she doesn't follow your advice, I'm VERY sorry. I wouldn't talk to her anymore because if she gets caught, you might get busted too. Also, how is she getting these drugs if she's on probation...

Answer 6

You know that if you stick your nose in her business she will hate you. There is really nothing you can do but tell someone like a teacher or family and children services and then she will be in a world of trouble. If she does not want help then there is nothing you can do for her. I smoked marijuana when i was pregnant and i did not want to quit. My son was born and tested positive for it. The only way i quit was when family and children services were planning to take my child away.

Answer 7

If I was in your shoes and I really cared about my friend as I'm sure you do I would talk to the school conselor, call a drug abuse agency and talk to a trusted teacher. Look you can always have this secretly done so she doesn't neccessarily have to know that you told. If my friend was doing this stuff I would do anything in my power to help her. I hope you can get her help and hope things go ok.

Answer 8

Honestly, if she is on probation, do her unborn baby a favor and tell her probation officer that she is on drugs. I know that it is terrible to have to tell on your friend like that but, would you rather she have a crack addicted baby or possibly miscarry because of all of her addictions? The baby should come first. Once your friend gets clean, she will forgive you...and if she does not, she is not worth keeping as a friend anyway.

Answer 9

Turn her in! If she doesn't have enough sense to protect her baby then you are going to have to do it! Don't let it make you feel bad, feel good to know that because of you that baby will have a chance at a normal life!!! It has nobody but you, to look out for it! It will make things better for your friend as well!

Answer 10

have you talked to her about this? when it comes to someone with a drug addiction it is really hard to get them to help themselves, all you can do is be a friend tell her how you feel and it will be up to her in the end what she decides to do. as far as the baby, its really horrible but there is nothing anyone could do about that except her. it will be up to her in the end whether she has the baby or not, that is her right.