Dangerous attraction to an ex.bf??

Question

I have been married to my hubby 5 yrs we were college sweet hearts but have been having lots of problems.Hubby has issues at work we started of working for the same company just different branches making the same amount but over time i started getting promotions started making more money and my hubby stayed pretty much at the same level he started at.This is when hubbys irrational mood swings started causing fights.I was transfered 3 months ago to hubbys department as hubbys bosses boss.Things have been really silent around our home and hubby does not understand me or my goals.I have plans to quit my job at the end of this year and go into entrepreneur work for more flexiable work day.Problem is my new business partner is an ex.bf from highschool i am still very much attracted to and vice-versa.We think a lot a like have a strange understanding and i am afraid this could be dangerous since my marriage is on rocks?

I did not tell my hubby that one of my ex.bf was a new parnter because it will only cause fights.

Answer 1

Hun, you are walking right into danger!!!! Why are you quiting? Your husband is the one with the issue here. Why does he feel so threatened that you are higher up the corporate ladder? If he can't handle it you sure shouldn't give in to his negative feelings. You guys need to talk about it seriously. I mean sit down and really talk. Heart to heart. Work something out. would it be better if he left the company? And you really don't want to work with this ex bf b/c that will surely destroy your already weak marriage. Don't tempt yourself, especially if deep down you know you will give in. You working somewhere else will not solve the problem - the fact is that you would still make more money. And I'm sure if your husband knew about your feelings towards your ex bf he would NOT want you to do this. Think about your marriage and everything you guys have gotten together. Is it really worth it?

Answer 2

Have you ever sat down and talked to your husband about these issues? That is the first thing you need to do. Men need to feel respected by their wives. His ego may be seriously bruised by all your promotions. Are you rubbing it in somehow? He could be upset about something completely different, but if you don't talke to him, you will never know. Communication is critical in a marriage and it sounds like you haven't been doing any. You say you are concerned that going into business with an ex bf you are still attracted to "could" be dangerous. It's not dangerous, it's toxic. Does your husband know about these plans and who your prospective partner is? You either want to save your marriage or you don't. You need to get your priorities straight. You married that man for life. You took vows. Fix your marriage and let the new business wait.

Answer 3

To me you have already decided by what you have already made plans to do. Working with your ex and not telling your hubby that it is your ex is the first mistake. Maybe you should make your husband feel better and you should of respected him enough to not take a job in the same department way above him. I understand that you want to advance your career but you could of taken any other job then that one. How would you act if he did that to you?

Answer 4

Okay let's review: You are your husband's boss's boss which is a MAJOR shot to his ego, and now you're flirting with the idea of starting up a business with an ex boyfriend that you admit to having an attraction to? How is ANY of this good for your marriage? I was actually on your side until I read the part about you starting a business with your ex boyfriend. Clearly you're not a woman that puts her marriage first. So don't be surprised when you're served with papers.

Answer 5

Your ex is an ex for a reason (I'm sure you have heard that before). Five years of marrage is long. I think you may want to think this through. I personally think that you working with an ex will discomfort your husband. I wouldn't want my hubby working with an ex in which he is attracted to. Just don't let yourself stoop down to the every day marrage that doesn't last. Try to work with him and talk with him. Couples have their differences all the time. Some just take a little longer to settle.

Answer 6

It's on the rocks largely because you chose to go to work at the same place as your husband. As for the ex-boyfriend, I suppose telling you to stay away from it will be pointless as next month you'll probably be posting about some dilemma resulting from your having slept with him.

Quit your job and choose to so something that doesn't involve your ex. Otherwise, you won't be married long.

Answer 7

Doesn't sound like both of you effectively separated your marriage from work. I do not think your hubby will be very happy to know that you are going into business with an ex.

Talk about it.

Answer 8

UH, hello! If you have an attraction with this other person get some self control and REMEMBER who you married. OMG!! You will always come across someone that arouses you but you may not always have that chance to keep the one you married. Get your head and priorities straight if you want your marriage to work. Good luck.

Answer 9

Are you being fair to your hubby with this new busy deal? Work on your marriage or leave your hubby first.

Answer 10

My movie star weigh down, in a suitable little gown and a seductive mind-set, on a abandoned sea coast lower than the moonlight, and all she needs is me - and that i imagine i ought to bypass for that forbidden fruit! In different words, it ain't taking position, lol.