What would you do?

Question

My fiance was offered a senior position overseas. I agreed to the move and left a great job to follow him.

Now that we've been in the new country for 3 months, he's busy doing what he does best while I just can't find work. I have no friends, nothing to do... and I feel bored and very lonely.

He suggests that we should have a baby if I can't find work soon. We are comfortable financially, so money is not an issue. I am reluctant to have a baby right now because I've just graduated as a mature-aged student and want to pursue my career for a couple of years before settling down. He is 40 and I am 30.

If you were me, what would you do?
1. Go back to Australia to my old job (or find a new one) leaving him here
2. Find work in other country where there are more opportunities e.g. Vietnam, leaving him here
3. Just have the baby and become a homemaker
4. Keep trying to find work here for __ months before __ (please fill in the blank)
5. Any other suggestion?

We don't take having children lightly, it has always been our ultimate goal and that is why we have waited until we are at our age.

My dilemma is whether I should choose family life or career; or I have overlooked other alternative.

Answer 1

The first thing you need to do is meet new people. Go to the library, find a club that your interested in, or a hobby. try to find some group get together that is in the same field of work that you are in. Contact is very important, you will feel free-er and a lot more content. Those contacts will probably lead you to a job opportunity. Good Luck and Best Wishes to you.

Answer 2

You haven't given any good reasons for having a child at this time. Children are not something to occupy your time, they are your life. If you are unable to find a paying position, why not do volunteer work instead? It is a much more viable option for occupying your time if income is not an issue. Having nothing else to do is not a good reason to have children. And if you're willing to leave him, that's an even worse reason to think that having a child at this time would be a good idea! Hope this helps.