He's 35 years old and still pulls his clothes from a pile on the floor every day. he has dressers (2) but doesn't use them. I can't stand the mess anymore, I just feel like screaming! Help! We don't have kids yet, but are talking about it and I don't want my kids to do what he does.
2007-04-24 02:40:30 · 20 answers · asked by Bren 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Talk to him
Who does the laundry?
Part of doing the laundry is folding and putting away the clothes.
If you do the laundry, why not put them in the drawers or closet?
If he does the laundry, explain that putting them away is part of the job. (and be thankful that he does the laundry!!!)
2007-04-24 02:46:36 · answer #1 · answered by hi_stk_n 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Welcome to the dresser of the guy, THE FLOOR.
This will not change. Why would it?
What is the necessary component that he puts his clothes away.
If you want them in the drawer, put them there. The floor works for him.Here is how this will go. You complain and he does what he has always done. Then you put them away in the wrong places. That only reinforces his desire to leave them out. It will result in his never finding anything to the point where he tells you "DO NOT TOUCH MY CLOTHES". Then he will do his own laundry on his own time and put them where he wants, on the floor. Do not touch them.
Give up the fight or be miserable. Do it yourself ,correctly, or let it be. Is this really worth the headache?
Why are you worrying about kids, you cannot handle living with your husband. Kids only make it worse.
I think you should divorce your guy and go find some metro sexual wimp who puts his clothes away. That way when you scream he will cower.
2007-04-24 03:17:59 · answer #2 · answered by Flagger 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Bren, I think I know how you feel, for almost 20 years i did all the washing and ironing of his clothes. Kept the house spotless and people do admire how I keep out house clean and all,but sometimes it will get to you. My other half thinks that because I'm the wife I will do everything for him till last year,I got fed up. We have 3 kids and I don't mind doing theirs because their my kids and they do go to school 5 days a week, to go back to what I just said, yes since last year I told him if he doesn't help me with choirs, things will not be the same anymore.
When I wash and fold all the clothes, I leave his down stair in our family room, till he learn to pick it up and put it inside his drawer. How about don't let him know that it bothers you the mess that he does, he thinks because your the wife you will do everything for him, but if you stop, don't wash and fold his clothes,see what will happen,it will teach him a few lesson not to be a slab...
2007-04-24 03:04:37 · answer #3 · answered by islandgirl06 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My late husband was that way. I started going through once a month and putting everything that was on the floor into garbage bags and sending it to the dump. If you cant afford to buy new clothes hide them in the basement. When he complains he has no clothes, say nicely im sorry, i thought that it was garbage on the floor so i got rid of everything that was on the floor on my cleaning day. He WILL get mad, so be prepared, but after a few months of that, he will or should get the idea that the behavior is unacceptable.
2007-04-24 02:51:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had the same thing i just left them on the floor when he asked where some thing was i said on the floor he would yell and say why didn't you wash them i said they were not in the hamper i am your wife not your maid if you can't put them in the wash i wont clean them it lasted about 3 weeks then i put a hamper on his side of the bed and stuck to it now after 23 years he is tell the kids about it and if they don't pick up the close they do get washed done!!!!!
2007-04-24 02:50:12 · answer #5 · answered by grmilet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'd better nip it in the bud now. You just have to re-train him. I know that's a bad way to put it but it'll work. After you do the laundry, leave it in the laundry area. Set up a new "spot" for his stuff in an unconveinent place, don't fold it..anything so that he sees that if he doesn't do it, you surely won't.
Let him wear a wrinkled shirt to work or out with friends, see if they comment on it. If they say anything to you you can reply with a smarty remark like, "I'm not his maid or his mother."
2007-04-24 02:46:10 · answer #6 · answered by Lisa D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing worse than a sloppy man. I have a friend who is like this and it's absolutely ridiculous. He won't pick up after himself at all. His girlfriend used to live with him, but she got tired of the mess and moved out. His apartment is always cluttered, with clothes everywhere, unwashed dishes, and a basically unkept house. If your husband is anything like this, you 'd better figure out what you want to do. I don't think I could live with a person like this, let alone have children with them. Best wishes.
2007-04-24 02:57:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know why he does this--it's certainly not for lack of storage. Have you spoken with him about it, and asked him to put them away ? If he refuses to put them away, put them away for him. Tell him that you also share the bedroom with him, and that you refuse to have them on the floor and be walking around them all the time.
On a more serious note, rethink if he is even ready have children and be a responsible father if he can't be responsible with the small stuff.
2007-04-27 13:59:33 · answer #8 · answered by Tweety 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you were not being disrespectful for asking, because it's part of his responsibility to help around the house, now if it's hours before he has to be to work, I don't see it as a problem, but if your asking him right before he's going to leave to go to work, then I can see why he got upset. Because if my wife asked me to do something like that right before I went to work, I would be upset. I would be more than willing to do it after I get home though.
2016-05-17 10:17:04 · answer #9 · answered by alex 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him what I told my husband. "If you want to show me disrespect, please leave a note, not clothing" He got the hint (mostly) and it's better now. If this doesn't work, start leaving a mess in an area of the house that he's neat about (his garage, workshop, recliner) maybe he'll start to understand. It takes about 30 days to change a habit. Find a habit you have that drives him bonkers and negotiate a change for both of you.
Good luck :)
2007-04-24 05:01:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men are mostly like children when it comes things like this. He probably knows it irritates you so he will keep it up. Act like it doesn't bother you and maybe even make a few messes of your own that you know would push his buttons. Or if your really irritated throw his clothes on the front lawn...
2007-04-24 02:52:59 · answer #11 · answered by Julie J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋