Do u think i should go out of my way to help someone out when that person doesnt do the same for me?

Question

OK so here is the thing my cousin wants me to help her out get some free driving lesson with my instructor cause him and i get a long. Why should i help her when not so long ago i needed a favor from her real bad and she didnt care to help me out. I asked her to get me a job with her best friend george i told ger i really needed the job cause my family and i were going under really bad circumstances, she didnt help me she didnt mention me to her friend and now she wants a favor from me do u think i should help her out???
P.S: I cried to her that i needed the job bad to please help me out, and she didnt even care to tell him when she knew that he was hiring people.

I have help her out multiple times when she did not have a computer at home and she needed her important papers type and printed i would type it and printed every time, i have done soo many favors for her that it hurted when i needed something from her and she didnt try to help. It hurt soo bad.

Answer 1

Absolutely not!! What goes around, comes around. If she can't be there to help you when you need it then why should you have to drop everything for her when she wants it? Some people are very selfish and this is life, we tend to get used to it somehow.

Answer 2

I think that it will still go in a circle, maybe there was a time before you asked her for a job that she asked you for a favor that you didn't do so she paid you back by not doing a favor back. Stop this circle and go ahead and at least try and help her, there's no effort in it. Make sure to add to her that you're still looking for a job and that you'd really appreciate it if she could do that small favor for you too.

When small acts of kindness start, your life will automatically lighten up and become more meaningful, less bitter as you're making it sound, even though you're having a hard time. A small act of kindness will cheer you up and keep you up and energetic through the hardest of times. Stop the cycle of non-giving, and take this opportunity to prove your friendship and your love for her, even though she didn't do the same for you.

Only do it because it is so simple to just ask, you're not completely going out of your way, a simple asking to the instructor and if he says no, then that's fine, at least you tried when she didn't.

It's a great code of conduct to go by: if you have a opportunity to show a small act of kindness, take it and give it all your heart!

Answer 3

Here's the thing: what will happen between you and your instructor if you use him to help her? Will you still get along? Also, even if you talk to your instructor, he may not be able to offer free lessons. It would be unethical for him to do that, and depending on his boss or insurance policy, he might be risking his job. Up to a point, family should help family. But if it might hurt to help someone else, it's not the best thing. Go with your instincts on this one - I think you know what to do.

Answer 4

I think there may be two sides to your story, and I can see that you are angry about yours. But that doesn't change right and wrong. It is right to help someone in need, no matter what they did or didn't do for you. Be the bigger person, and set an example for your cousin. You will feel better about yourself than if you get into a revenge war with her.

Answer 5

hi by the question it is appearent that you are human being with soft and kind heart...
but to survive in this world at time you need to take firm and strong stance over afew matters...
look you have helped that person before and in the heart of your heart you are still willing to help that
person out but well the thing is we are no ANGELS atlast we are human being and there is TIT FOR TAT then i
suggest its about how you want to be an ANGEL or just like normal human being who expect something when he / she extend any favour to some one

Answer 6

well I'm not about you did this to me so I'm going to do this to you however if you keep allowing people to step on you you will eventually become their doormat, I personally would tell your cousin how you feel and if you really feel in your heart that you should or shouldn't help her then follow that, no one can tell you whats the better solution here. you'll find it inside of you, but look on the bright side if you did help her out it just shows your the bigger person I just wouldn't make a habit out of it once and that's it, listen to your heart ...pray on it god will help you in making your decision.

Answer 7

Ideally we should all want to help others in need. In this circumstance, however, I would let her know how I felt by saying something like this, " Why should I help you out____(her name)? When I needed a job, you didn't even mention my name to George." Let her know that you don't appreciate her asking you for help, when she has no interest in being there for you.

Answer 8

Sure. Why not. Somewhere, someone is noticing you helping someone in need.

I know that it sucks and you wish that she would give you he support like you do her, but, things will turn around. Stick in there and keep being that helpful person that you are being, and someone will take notice.

Karma--sometimes it is good sometimes it is bad. You have the good coming.

Answer 9

sounds like your cousin needs to focus on others, than just on herself, i would do what you feel is right, you should be the bigger person in this situation, she may not say anything , and she may not help you when you need it but in the end you know that you did what you should do and maybe she will change buit you cant worry about her changing, focus on whats important

Answer 10

For this sitution, you don't owe her anything and remind her why. She can pay someone to teach her to drive. Sounds like she is trying to take advantage of you. it would be different if she needed a kidney.