why are we so concerned with what other people think?

Question

even in posting a question i was thinking, hey does this question sound ok? did i word it right?
why do i care so much?
even with little stupid things like that

is it just me? it's ok if it is.

Answer 1

It's not just you.

relax.

we may think/say that we don't care what others think---it's a lie. We all want to fit in and most of us feel like we, uh, don't.

welcome to the human race.

B

Answer 2

Because we mamals are social beings. We play together, fight together, grow together. We form clans - neighborhood, town/city (go to a sporting event sometime) state and country. The more unsophisticated the more we trust those we know and distrust those we don't. Therefore we want to appear within the the "norm" of our clan so we can be recognised as belonging to the clan.
This behaviour can continue all through our lives, generally beginning with four or five friends who live in close proximity during middle school years expanding to the entire country sometimne between high school and a few years after college.
The clan is looking for "staus quo" where everything is known and acceptable. Therefore it is easy to recognise who is a part of our clan and who is not.
The famous playwright, Henric Ibson once said that society will think the "artist" mad because the "artist" is 10 years ahead of the masses. When 10 years pass, society will understand the "artist" and then proclaim him /her a genious for the previous 10 years but now a mad man - because he's still 10 years ahead of the masses.

This is the value of the few who are apart from the masses. THey are ahead (sometimes behind) like a squad scouting the future and showing by example variations on the status quo that the masses either can adapt for their betterment (or worse) or discard.

Answer 3

Lack of self confidence. If you really believe in yourself
and your lifestyle, then people will generally admire this
quality even though they may not agree with it. In my
experience, I've found that nobody really cares what you
do as they're too wrapped up in their own lives. To dwell
on the possible opinions of people you have no real
connection with is to stifle your creative spirit and put
the kibosh on the momentum you need to get on with
life. Trial and error is the best way to grow, especially
if you're young. You want to do the best thing for
yourself, but don't always know what that is. By finding
out what it's not is the key.

Answer 4

Humans are herd animals, or a better way to say it is we're tribal creatures. Even in this "modern" age any one different, "out of the box", is teased, put down, and really, just feared. It starts early on the school playground, etc. The result is we become conditioned to fearing difference, even within ourself.

Of course, it's always been the ones who left the tribe (whether ostracized or curious) that evolved humanity. Dare to be different, and if it's difficult, at least be more accepting of those that are different than you.

Answer 5

Humans are animals with a herd instinct and a social drive. We are meant to be part of a community; it's how we've survived.

For a group to survive there must be uniformity among its members. Therefore we have an instinct to try and be like the herd. Any herd.

Everyone identifies with something and someone who thinks and/or acts the same way they do. No matter how large or small, everyone's part of a herd.

Answer 6

It's not just you. Our culture is concerned to a fault with what others think. I was just writing in my journal this morning that I am taking conscious steps to stop the annoying and useless habit of caring how others see me. I want to be my authentic self. When you are busy changing yourself to adjust to your imagined perceptions of others, you lose authenticity.
Really, we don't know what others think anyway! So why bother. LOL

Answer 7

i am like that too. we are bored of being unnoticed i guess. i do get fed up of thinking of all these unnecessary stuff. i think i'm going to change that now.
glad that u asked this question. you made me realise how important not to care about what others think. we shouldn't care.

Answer 8

I am personnaly appalled that a person as intelligent as you, would consider preoccupation with correct wording and phrasing as 'a stupid little thing' (even as a figure of speech) . Please trust a little more your restless psyche

Answer 9

I think it has to do with how self center we are..for example:
Some people really care what they look like, other don't.
Some cared how cool they act, again so don't.

I know for me its spelling. I don't people I know to read my work but people I don't know... that I can live with.

Answer 10

it's not just you. we are social creatures. no matter how we claim to rebel or be different or independent, the fact of the matter is that we are a part of a society, and we all strive to fit in in our own way. the important part is deciding which parts are important, and whose opinion matters to you.